Well, there are some people nowadays, who identify as transparent with who/where pronouce, it doesn't mean I can't see them. It's just another social construct like religion, there's no science in it. Same with nature vs nurture concept, it doesn't work because your inner self can't win against nature, you'll just cease to exist. At one point you nurtured your inner self to believe you're "cisgender man", at another point your inner self modified your nature to become less of a cisgender man, because you didn't like what masculine nature did to you. Constant interaction with nature and nurture, you see. =D The fact that you find some of your feminine nature features pleasant means that they're natural to you now and the fact that you don't feel dysphoric about them, means you're at least NB at this point in time. The moment when your inner self decided that your masculine nature = ugly and your feminine nature = attractive might have triggered it all, but I bet there were more signs of gender diversity even before that.
At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is what we are right now, and you are a far deviated from cisgender norms organism atp, both in nature and nurture. =D
