i'll never get my self esteem back

[isishearmyplea]

People just trying to say its better to be bald and rich rather than bald and broke. Both situation sucks, it sucks some major balls. .everybody here knows that, they are just telling people whats the best you can do now, now that male pattern baldness has decided to **** you over. Dont think for a second that people are not able to appreciate your POV or rather as you mention "Society's" perscpective. I think you are not able to digest what you yourself have just said, most of the people have done that here . .at least to an extent and trying/suggesting others to make the best of the things, of whatevers thats left anyway.

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Accept the fact that you will have to get things for yourself in another way. Clinging to how pretty you were with hair will get you nowhere. And dont think that you will never be loved, because love is an illusion, just a game of fulfilling some need, for somebody.

Ouch!Its not good to be 100% honest. haha

 

[maher]

No. I'm just being fair.. Its obvious you know nothing about women.. or life. Ever been in long term relationship? lived with a women? got engaged? everything that you think you know about women comes from you little sociopathic experiments you perform on your dates.
I dont like this misogyny environment you're trying to force on this forum. Its not what its all about. I know that you blame society for everything, but this is not the proper reaction how to deal with that.

 

[maher]

Fred, this thread is not about YOU. Why do you have to rape almost every thread?

 

[EvilLocks]

Fair? It's that so... I just turned 25 and in my life, I've been on 30 first dates, kissed 27 women, slept with 17 women, have been in a relationship for a year in total, have been with up to 3 women at the same time, and my last relationship lasted 6 months. These are facts, and I'm not bragging. You can take or leave what I say about life and women based on these statistics.

You actually count how many women you've kissed and how many dates you've been on? That's weird.
Do you keep a log and all? xD

 

[2bald2young]

Fair? It's that so... I just turned 25 and in my life, I've been on 30 first dates, kissed 27 women, slept with 17 women, have been in a relationship for a year in total, have been with up to 3 women at the same time, and my last relationship lasted 6 months. These are facts, and I'm not bragging. You can take or leave what I say about life and women based on these statistics.

I virtually lived with some of my girlfriends and I hated it, it's never healthy to spend all your time with one person, you wouldn't do with a friend right? So why do it with a woman? Obviously, that's why I will also never get engaged or married. Any man wanting to get married nowadays is out of this mind, there is nothing for us out of this deal.

Most of all this as a bald man in his early 20's. So I think I can safely say I know a great deal about women and how they operate. Call this sociopathic if you want, and it may be to an extent, as most men and women will talk about true love or whatever fairy tale BS, but baldness and its harsh reality forced this lifestyle and way of thinking on me.

When you're bald, suddenly, there is no true love anymore, girls are not proud to be seen with you and will try to hide you from their friends. Because you do not look like the prince charming they manufactured in their little entitled princess head.

Now that I'm slowly getting my hair back, maybe women's attitude will change, but what difference does it make now? I know their true nature, and I'll never be able forget their hypergamic behaviour and how some mocked me and attacked me for being bald.

We blame society, because society is the problem, not us. As hellouser would say, who automatically finds bald men repulsive, desperate and pathetic? The blame is not on us.

secretly you are .

 

[2bald2young]

Actually, I think my stats are quite low, I feel I could do way better than that but I've been so insecure about my baldness these last years.

Nowadays, I almost never approach women in real life for example. It all happens on online dating.

That might also change with my new head of hair coming. To get back to the topic, if you really want to crush your self-esteem, try to hit on hot girls with a NW4+.

But don't forget, it's all about confidence! This guy gets it:

This picture feels so awkward and inadequate.

sigh, I feel bad about saying this but it looks more like he is her father...

 

[bilboswaggins]

sigh, I feel bad about saying this but it looks more like he is her father...

well he is close to 20 years older
plus its easier to be confident if you are a wealthy, famous movie star

 

[DoctorHouse]

Fred, I hear you and I understand where you are coming from. It is not about confidence. Its more about self-esteem. The major problem with humans are we tend to have low self esteem usually based mostly on our looks and sometimes based upon our accomplishments. The main theme of this forum is people with low self esteem. People with low self esteem not only judge themselves physically and mentally but they judge everyone around them in the exact same way.

How many of you honestly can say you enjoy being around negative people with low self esteem? I certainly don't. If you do, its understandable because misery loves company. I sometimes use the misery of this forum to make me feel better about myself. Unfortunately, even though I was blessed with a full head of hair, good height, and good looks, I always lacked self esteem. That was my downfall and because of it I developed all these limiting beliefs just like so many here have especially about the subject of women. I lived a life as a loner and still do because I opened my eyes up and realized there are very few people in life that are "real bargains". I have yet to come across gorgeous women who don't have some type of self esteem problem. As long as we have envy, we will have self esteem issues. That is another one of my biggest flaws and so many of you have the same flaw of envy. You envy all the NW1s and think their life is perfect. I got news for you first hand, it will not doing anything for you other than make you look more youthful and maybe get some more attention but it will not in no way shield you from envy or low self esteem.

Fred, the fact that you have slept with 17 women makes a statement right there. You obviously realized that life has value to it when you use it to your advantage. And sometimes it means taking advantage of a situation where you did it only because you made it all about you. To most here, on the surface you seem like a real stud. But from your actions, I realize you are really hurting deep down inside. Your self esteem must be suffering because somewhat because of your hair situation. Your confidence has always been there but can you say you are truly happy living in a society that bases everything on looks. I know I can't. Our society has created this "monster" in all of us. We did this to ourselves. We took the value of marriage and placed it at the same level as divorce. Easy come, easy go. Today, more people are single than every before. Marriage is now just for those who are religious who feel that is the only "holy" way to bind yourself to someone for life. To me marriage is just a business agreement that requires a lot of discipline and sacrifices that most humans don't have the stomach for. Its not the white picket fence fantasy we learned in movies and from our parents or grand parents. Now we see movies based on divorce, revenge, and deceit.

Hellouser's posts are great. He knows we have become victims of society and the media. He knows what makes our self-esteem sink to the level that this place is a safe haven to come to and express our pain. But it is no safe haven, as even in here people are attacked for whatever they say. No person can just say, I see your point and you are entitled to your opinion but I just don't share the same perspective and leave it at that. No, instead they give them a red star(neg rep) and say F**k YOU!. It takes a lot less energy just to ignore them and their posts. But conflicts are ways to try and boost your self esteem so the flame wars fire up.

And Exodus, for you, a person whose self esteem is at its lowest because of society's standards, all I have to say is you have the most courage on here. You are the most humble and deserving of attention and support because you one of the biggest victims here. I commend you on being noble enough to reach out for help. However, only you can help yourself better than any of us. Read and educate yourself on how to survive in this world we live in. Education is your greatest asset in life as it teaches you how to survive in this "hell" we have created. I have used it to my advantage and it helps me to realize no one here is better than anyone else. We are all equals from the start. Its what you do in life and what you accomplish in life that will matter more to you than anyone else. You still got your youth. Your lack of hair is not going to take that a way from you. Learn from Fred to take advantage of life and do what makes you happy. If you don't want to be a virgin, then find someone who will help you with that. Yes, we have people for that too. If you want to stay a virgin, then that is fine too. That does not define you. In life,its all about survival. Nothing wrong to take advantage of a situation as long as you can accept the consequences.

 

[EvilLocks]

But don't forget, it's all about confidence! This guy gets it:

This picture feels so awkward and inadequate.

Damn, Billy Zane used to be such a handsome guy. He still would be, if it weren't for his baldness.

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But kudos to him for not trying to hide his baldness although he is a known actor.

 

[2bald2young]

Indeed, how can denialists still hold the discourse that hair loss when you can clearly what it does to someone's looks:

They simply don't want to believe that they are fu**ked. Look at destiny for example. The game isn't how people thought it would be and still you have people in denial. They just didn't wanted to accept that the game indeed s***ked and that they got ripped off. Denial is simply just the rejection of the truth because you DON'T want to accept the truth.

 

[Lollerme]

EL, why do you even bother with these two. They know nothing about women, their opinion on the subject is irrelevant. AAMOF, its ridiculous. And CF quoting Fred in a signature... Enough said.

So true.

 

[bilboswaggins]

Indeed, how can denialists still hold the discourse that hair loss is no big deal when you can clearly what it does to someone's looks:

billy zane is actually one of the few that look decent bald because of his nice head shape and good features. (ive seen pictures where he is fully shaved and looks heaps better than in the pic above)
even then, as you said, these "lucky ones" still look so much better with hair

 

[Wolf Pack]

If he trimmed his horse shoe to grade 1 or just complete shave, he would look much better. Not sure why he is letting it grow out.

 

[EvilLocks]

If he trimmed his horse shoe to grade 1 or just complete shave, he would look much better. Not sure why he is letting it grow out.

Here he is with close shave and it looks much better indeed. But still not close to looking as good as he would have looked with a full head of hair. I think we can all agree on that there is no denying hair loss is the #1 thing to hurt your looks, especially since most other flaws can be fixed. Big nose? Get a nose job. Bad teeth? Get dental veneers. Fat? Pale? Get a tan. Lose weight. Small boobs for girls? Boob job. Big boobs for guy? Surgery to get rid of them. +++ A hair transplant is not an option for everyone. And for the love of God, a hair piece is not a fix, it has never been and will never be. Anything but growing hair from ones own scalp is not a fix.

 

[jksl]

Exodus, get some good and useful college education ASAP, being bald, short AND POOR is just suicide and the saddest life ever. Being bald and somewhat wealthy is OK, many of them eat at my restaurant and seem to date decent women.

That is my plan. My life is never gonna be awesome, it can only be okay if my career succeeds.

The saddest life would be to be short, bald, fat, poor, humourless, lack intelligence, and have a small penis.

 

[hellouser]

Indeed, how can denialists still hold the discourse that hair loss is no big deal when you can clearly what it does to someone's looks:

There's a reason why we don't see him in movies anymore... his career left him when his hair started to go. There are countless other actors who's careers went to **** (John Travolta) but people would rather make idiots out of us and tell us stories of the few successful bald celebs.

 

[jksl]

I think all bald men should thank James Cameron for making him wear a wig in Titanic.

Imagine if he left him bald in that iconic movie every young girl has seen, we would have been doomed.

I remember watching that film in the theatre and I was hoping Zane would shoot DiCaprio. To death. But, he missed!

Well, at least he froze to death not long after.

 

[Exodus2011]

damn thanks for the support guys! ill rep when I can. I know these are all just words but its reassuring to know I'm not alone. I wanted to friend some of you on Facebook but I'm not sure if any of you would want to do that. Private message me if you do. It wud be nice to have someone I can relate to to message quickly.

I'd say really thats another **** aspect of baldness. You cant relate to anyone. not your friends. not the full head of hair protagonist in every fiction ever. not anything. just the weirdo, the villain, the creep, etc.

Also the identity thing Fred mentions is another unsung issue. YOu are just known as "the bald guy". I remember a few months ago I joked to someone saying my musician name wud be "DJ Lizard". he said that it shud be "DJ 8ball".

OUch. Baldness even destroying my fantasies -_-

**** just knowing that you cant be anything but "the bald guy" wud be enough on its own. But then you have all this other stuff like reduced attractiveness, harder to get girls, make less money, to overwhelm you totally 0_0

meh at least right now, in my room, with my nice laptop or playing my xbox it doesnt matter. no matter what it is still an aesthetic issue and we are still functional. I try to be thankful for that

 

[uncomfortable man]

People just dont realize how badly balding fvcks up your self esteem. Not to mention all the insults added to injury that inevitably ensues, driving us even further down. We are the unwilling victims on the wrong side of a socialy contracted double standard.

 

[Lollerme]

So true.

a woman hater negged me for this comment