How many of us on these forums deal with anxiety?

[zeroes]

I have the same problem Law, most people don't care what you or I do, they only care about themselves. They will only care if you hurt them. It's all a mentality thing.

 

[uncomfortable man]

i hate to be the one bringing the bad vibes (or love to).

but

how baseless is this bdd or reclutance in case if the person really does have visible defects in his appearence? such as being bald, which is a very conspicious feature.
there a lot of folk out there willing to hate on you for the smallest reasons, so maybe this fear of interaction is a valid one, not just delusion of one's mind?

you might say one must learn to disregard them , but someone who suffers from anxiety won't be able to just ignore the reactions.

I can vouge for this ^, someone can look totally normal (handsome even) but with BDD think they look like a monster. It is in cases like this that the problem literally resides in the afflicted's own mind. Other people don't see a monster or a freak when looking at him or talking to him.... NOW, take someone who does have a glaring physical defect that is universally viewed as unattractive (apparently a crime these days) like advanced male pattern baldness + BDD = WORST FEARS REALIZED. Why? Because everyone see's a monster when they look at you and you can't just ignore other peoples messed up reactions to your appearance and not let it affect you. It is one of the worst social punishments a man can face, going bald. In this case the problem doesn't solely reside in his mind, the problem is societies perception and prejudice combined with the fact that he is bald.

 

[Thom]

Who actually looks at a bald man as a monster though? Just less attractive, but most times that happens with age anyway.

 

[uncomfortable man]

I've been gawked at like a monster many, many times. It's a terrible feeling having social anxiety disorder and then having your worst fears realized everytime you leave the house without a hat on. People are insensitive, they will stare at you and make you feel uncomfortable.

 

[israelite]

If you read this, you will find this defines the majority of people posting on this forum. Notice how it mentions hair as one of the three most common things people tend to obsess about. For me it was first my skin since I had acne, and when I got that under control, my hair become the second obsession but luckily that started alot later in life. Many people say they won't care about things like this as they age or get older. Trust me, it you have mild BDD, you will always care no matter how old you become. Its what defines you as a person. I just learned never to let it control my life enough to ruin it. Most people with BDD tend to be perfectionist too. I wish I could turn off my BDD permanently but I can't but I know how to suppress it enough to be able to function in society and do well financially.

bdd is ruining my life. it won't leave me alone lol I'm a goddam human pinata

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no joke i dropped over 30k on this disease.

 

[antman]

the only way to get out of BDD is to hang round other people and try and make them your focus (or forgot about your own tasks/goals) and persist with this. Eventually your Easy-Going (introverted/people-orientated), Out-going (extroverted/people-orientated) and leader/taskmaster (extroverted/task-orientated) personalities will develop. if drinking a bit of alcohol is what it takes to forgot about your life whilst around other people then just do it, eventually it will become natural to side to and from introverted to extroverted and people to task orientated depending on the environment you are in.

people will give away ques if you are expressing the wrong part of your personality. if they say you are quiet/shy then u r being introverted/task-orientated when u should be out-going (extroverted/people-orientated), if they say you are being stubben/sulky then you need to try and slide into easy-going (introverted/people-orientated). anybody can learn/practise other parts of their personality. a taskmaster can easily go out and become the life of the party just as an Melancholy can transition into being easy-going.

the problem with hair loss is that its such an in-your-face defect that it !@#$s up your ability to let your personality move freely around because people don't warm up to you very well which makes it a 10000000 times harder to keep people orientated when u r around people. do whatever it takes to find people that you are comfortable being people-orientated (introverted and extroverted) and indulge in it for a long as possible.

any bald guy that has the skill of keeping people-orientated will eventually win over the people around him.

if you think, 'i don't want to be out-going because they seem superficial' then chances are your out-going side of yourself is nothing like theirs; everyone is different.

 

[zeroes]

Even if I was a nw0 or 1 I wouldn't be able to do any of that, my social anxiety won't let me. My social skills aren't good enough either. I've got a lot of learning to do.

I think the above is great for those that only have hair loss as their main problem.

 

[Thom]

My social-skills have developed a lot in the last two years. It used to be I would be in a class for most of the semester before I started talking to people, people just thought I was snobby or an elitist but I never knew what to say. Now I just walk right in on the first day and usually strike up a conversation, even with beautiful girls. I have made a lot of good friends with pretty girls but I still can't atrike up the courage to ask anyone out, especially since I dated a crazy girl last...makes me very careful. I figure since I have come a long way in the past couple years I will eventually be able to feel comfortable with asking someone out again.

As for this bdd, I've developed a scalp itch again and a bit of a shed so I'm constantly obsessing with whether or not my finasteride is wearing off. Sometimes I just go through itchy shedding phases though, it just spikes my anxiety.

 

[israelite]

my social skills are good

 

[LooseItAll]

Even if I was a nw0 or 1 I wouldn't be able to do any of that, my social anxiety won't let me. My social skills aren't good enough either. I've got a lot of learning to do.

I think the above is great for those that only have hair loss as their main problem.

Same with me. Hairloss or not my social life sucks

 

[DoctorHouse]

I have something worse. I have social intolerance. I have no problem conversing with people, I just find very few people interesting or stimulating to listen too. I enjoy people who like to educate and like to teach or who are real spiritual. I don't enjoy listening to people who complain all the time and blame all their problems on everyone else. People who are on quest to help themselves are enjoyable too. I am on that quest always. Once in a while on here, we get some posters with some great words of wisdom and I do like reading stuff like that on here.
I have good news for all you social people with anxiety or poor social skills. Eventually, as long as you work with the public, you will develop better social skills. And once you learn everyone has dysfunction, you will feel right at ease as you will not feel you are the only one with defects.

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bdd is ruining my life. it won't leave me alone lol I'm a goddam human pinata

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no joke i dropped over 30k on this disease.

What did you get for 30K?

 

[israelite]

I have something worse. I have social intolerance. I have no problem conversing with people, I just find very few people interesting or stimulating to listen too. I enjoy people who like to educate and like to teach or who are real spiritual. I don't enjoy listening to people who complain all the time and blame all their problems on everyone else. People who are on quest to help themselves are enjoyable too. I am on that quest always. Once in a while on here, we get some posters with some great words of wisdom and I do like reading stuff like that on here.
I have good news for all you social people with anxiety or poor social skills. Eventually, as long as you work with the public, you will develop better social skills. And once you learn everyone has dysfunction, you will feel right at ease as you will not feel you are the only one with defects.

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What did you get for 30K?

i have spent over 11 k on my teeth. 4000 or 5000 on steroids. 1500 JUST ON CB-0301!!!!!! 1k on rum, 110 ru, 700 on dr p products, 1k on ahk, 150 asc, 2 k on hairloss shampoos/products, 1500 bleaching my skin, 1k diamond earing

 

[LooseItAll]

i have spent over 11 k on my teeth. 4000 or 5000 on steroids. 1500 JUST ON CB-0301!!!!!! 1k on rum, 110 ru, 700 on dr p products, 1k on ahk, 150 asc, 2 k on hairloss shampoos/products, 1500 bleaching my skin, 1k diamond earing

ooooooook
[*]

 

[uncomfortable man]

How do I deal with anxiety? I put my beanie on before I leave the house. Even if it is burning hot out I will still wear that damn beanie because I guess I'm the type of person who would rather experience physical discomfort over emotional discomfort. I'm sure there are those of you who don't approve of my strategy of hiding but then again who has the nw5 with social anxiety disorder? I will admit that I am protecting my ego by doing this no doubt but wearing a beanie all the time is not my denial of being bald, more like my refusal to be seen that way (in that unflattering light). And shame, just general shame.
Recently I stumbled upon a site called The Bald Wall and I read their mission statement and it partially encapsulated how I feel about why I wear the beanie always.... "When there is no more shame in being bald then the bald wall can come down. Until that day comes the wall stays up" paraphrasing of course. Why should I subject myself to being bombarded with negative attention and insults for something that is not my fault? When there is no shame in being bald, when bald men are truly seen as equal and not lesser to those with hair, until I see bald ****in men in the macy's, Target, Khols or JPC catalogs and commercials that aren't black and leading roles in romantic movies, until bald men aren't villainized by the media, until people look bald men in the eyes instead of the forehead I will wear this ****in beanie because that is my wall, it is my protection.