The depression caused by hair loss is erroding my will to live....

[lkm370]

You know, I really tried to avoid posting this but lately I find myself just losing all touch with reality. Every since I realized I was losing my hair, I've been hit with periodic bouts of severe depression. I'm talking about months of not working do to just a general feeling of worthlessness. I've seen women I used to hook up with disappear and friends go their own way. The women left because of my baldness and the friends because I'm too depressed to make time with them. I don't blame either.

I don't know how much more of this I can take of this. Its not even the baldness ruining my life but the depression that comes with it. I just cant seem to find reasons to get up in the morning, to carry out my goals, to make effort to talk to girls. Everything just seems futile. I'm just seen as the stereotypical bald guy. Think about it, when you have hair...you can change your persona. Grow a mo hawk...your punk. Grow it long...your metal. Grow it short...your military serious guy. But when your just a shaved bald guy, you look like every other facking bald guy. Seriously, when your bald there's only one look you can pull off...the bald guy look. And to all those saying..."just get ripped brah", have you ever noticed how every facking bald guy is a meat-head bald ugly mother fack?!?!?

I cant do this anymore. I recently watched a documentary about Ronald Reagan...they showed the last known picture of Ronald Reagan taken sometime in the late 90s. The man was like 80 something and still had a Norwood -1, and here I am....a goddamned 25 year old with a Norwood 5/6. I can't take these severe mood swings and bouts of depression anymore. Everything just seems so pointless. I exercise, eat healthy, mediate, keep myself busy... I do everything i can to keep myself occupied and to stay positive but it doesn't help. I've never complained about this to friends, family, or even internet forums because I know nobody cares in real life but Jesus Christ....how can any sane human being deal with this baldness induced depression. I dont live in a humane country like the European countries or Canada....I live in America where there is no access to good mental health without $$. I feel like I'm going off the deep end and there's nothing I can do...

 

[Agustin Araujo]

You know, I really tried to avoid posting this but lately I find myself just losing all touch with reality. Every since I realized I was losing my hair, I've been hit with periodic bouts of severe depression. I'm talking about months of not working do to just a general feeling of worthlessness. I've seen women I used to hook up with disappear and friends go their own way. The women left because of my baldness and the friends because I'm too depressed to make time with them. I don't blame either.

I don't know how much more of this I can take of this. Its not even the baldness ruining my life but the depression that comes with it. I just cant seem to find reasons to get up in the morning, to carry out my goals, to make effort to talk to girls. Everything just seems futile. I'm just seen as the stereotypical bald guy. Think about it, when you have hair...you can change your persona. Grow a mo hawk...your punk. Grow it long...your metal. Grow it short...your military serious guy. But when your just a shaved bald guy, you look like every other facking bald guy. Seriously, when your bald there's only one look you can pull off...the bald guy look. And to all those saying..."just get ripped brah", have you ever noticed how every facking bald guy is a meat-head bald ugly mother fack?!?!?

I cant do this anymore. I recently watched a documentary about Ronald Reagan...they showed the last known picture of Ronald Reagan taken sometime in the late 90s. The man was like 80 something and still had a Norwood -1, and here I am....a goddamned 25 year old with a Norwood 5/6. I can't take these severe mood swings and bouts of depression anymore. Everything just seems so pointless. I exercise, eat healthy, mediate, keep myself busy... I do everything i can to keep myself occupied and to stay positive but it doesn't help. I've never complained about this to friends, family, or even internet forums because I know nobody cares in real life but Jesus Christ....how can any sane human being deal with this baldness induced depression. I dont live in a humane country like the European countries or Canada....I live in America where there is no access to good mental health without $$. I feel like I'm going off the deep end and there's nothing I can do...

It's hard. :sad:

I'm suffering from premature male pattern baldness and premature greying. I suffer from depression, it's got nothing to do with my hair loss though; however, I will admit that my male pattern baldness does get me down sometimes. It's obviously no fun to suffer from any medical condition, including alopecia.

 

[lkm370]

It's hard. :sad:

I'm suffering from premature male pattern baldness and premature greying. I suffer from depression, it's got nothing to do with my hair loss though; however, I will admit that my male pattern baldness does get me down sometimes. It's obviously no fun to suffer from any medical condition, including alopecia.

I just feel like a godamned old man. Bah, even most old men have more charisma and happiness than me. All I feel from waking up to sleep is depression...soul crushing, paralyzing depression. And what makes it worse is the fact nobody takes it seriously though I cant say I blame them. Everyone think's your either whining or taking it too serious. My dad is goddamned 65 with a NW2 and telling me to not worry about it...well yeah how would he know...he hit the genetic lottery.

Every girl I've ever loved is with a guy with hair. Every girl I used to bang is not with a guy with hair. And here I am...this undesirable bald loser. Hitting the gym but looking like every other roided up bald loser. It just feels like the saddness will last forever

 

[Agustin Araujo]

And it has nothing to do with hair loss, that's solved for me. I just feel... empty, for no reason.

If you've got everything that you need to be happy and you're not happy, maybe you have depression FredTheBelgian? No offense.

I suffer from Depression and I need to take medication for it, otherwise I just can't function well. Maybe you need to take medication if you really do have depression and suffered from depressive episodes in the past for no reason. Talk to your doctor if you're having these issues, there's nothing wrong with getting treatment for it.

I was having issues like that even before my alopecia struck. Proper treatment really helps.

 

[lkm370]

It just seems as if the hair loss exacerbates the depression. Sure, I had depression before hair loss, but it could always easily be cured by a night of banging some chick or going out or whatever. Now I have nothing. Sure this isnt the healthy way to think about it but lets be realistic...humans are social beings whose sole goal is to reproduce. I'm sure it will temporarily pass...give it a day or two but it always returns. Before, with hair, there was always something to hope about. But now it's all just damn pointless...Go to the gym...yeah and become another of 99% bald meat head gym brahs.

Man, I'm seriously about to just check out of reality all together. This bulls.h.i.t. life is just not worth living.

Blessed are those 95% of balding guys who just don't care and think they can still get it without hair...i truly wish I was that ignorant

 

[Notcoolanymore]

I have been on dutasteride+finasteride for a year and have kept my hair loss at bay but it terrifies me that this is my eventual destiny

You posted this in late May 2014. Sounds like you were having some success with meds. Did all of a sudden things go down hill? I tried looking to see if you posted pics, but didn't find any.

 

[lkm370]

You posted this in late May 2014. Sounds like you were having some success with meds. Did all of a sudden things go down hill? I tried looking to see if you posted pics, but didn't find any.

I was maintaining on finasteride+dutasteride but it was really messing with my head and body. No sexual sides but I always got headaches and it felt like fire circulating in my veins in my head. I had extreme dandruff and itchiness. My brain just felt like it was being fried and my scalp was an endless supply of dandruff which always retired me to wear a hat.

I quit all meds temporarily then slowly reinserted just finasteride into my regimen but my hairs just began thinning and shedding into overtime. My scalp is visible in a Norwood 5/6 pattern so one day I just quit and shaved about a month ago. No more dandruff, headaches, brain fog, mood swings, etc...

To be honest, the entire time I was on dutasteride and finasteride, I really was worried about the effects of dutasteride on my body in the future so there is a peace of mind knowing I'm not doing anything potentially dangerous to myself. I read everything I could about dutasteride before I started because I know its heavy duty and now I can see why.

I may try slowly reinserting dutasteride on certain intervals...like maybe once every 3 days or once ever week and see the effects since I am still hoping for regrowth atm despite my losses.

 

[DoctorHouse]

To make things clear, my post strictly relates to depression and anxiety and not about hair loss since I have no authority on that subject based on our experts like Exodus and Uncomfortable Man. And by the way, Fred, I appreciate the fact that you have never bashed me for not being a hair loss expert. That is why I really respect and admire you the most on here regardless of what people think about you.

Depression and Anxiety are so common today that is very understandable that many people can feel this without any particular reason. We have an "automatic" brain wired in us and it can take over at anytime. If our brain is used to being in depressed or anxiety mode, then you may feel that way for no apparent reason or in some cases you know exactly why. Most of the time it is caused from a chemical imbalance. You are low in serotonin mostly. Many times its nutrition or stress that can deplete you of this. For boosting your serotonin levels, activities like exercise(yes, even sex) can boost those levels to make you feel better. That is why you see so many people at the gym pumping iron trying to boost their serotonin levels to feel better about themselves. However, when you start comparing yourself to anyone, your "automatic" brain can get fired up and then you become depressed or anxious if you feel inferior to them for whatever reason. So basically, as Fred said, depression is a tough nut to crack because your "automatic" brain wants to take over. When you are around people who you feel "superior" too, then confidence and self esteem tend to rise and you feel less anxious and depressed. Unfortunately, for Exodus, that is going to be almost impossible because in most situations he will be the "odd" man out.

There are only two solutions to this problem. The easy way out is suicide which icon legend Robin Williams took which I really don't recommend. The only other solution is to rewire you brain to control your "automatic" brain. And yes, that solution is very difficult but if you can do it 20 percent of the time and try to increase it as much as possible life can be bearable. The key word is FOCUS. As long as you keep your focus off yourself, that is a great baby step. If you can't, you will always fail every time. That is when you are going to have to rely on drugs and therapy to teach you how to do it. Another baby step is to stop comparing yourself to anyone else. There is no point to this as you are never going to ALWAYS measure up on the "outside" but you can excel from the "inside". Most people are drawn to people who are entertaining and interesting and good educators. That's why we love movies, TV, sports, and for some education.

One of the easiest ways to divert your focus is audiobooks or reading books if you like to read. I love audiobooks. The best one is Tony Robbins new book. Look it up on Amazon, you will find it. Just to let you know, Tony Robbins is the most amazing person you will get to know if you read or listen to his latest book.

Another baby step is try to wean yourself off forums that are full of negative and depressed posts. However, in some cases it can work to your advantage when you read a post with someone who is going thru the exact same thing as you. Its always great to feel that you are not the only one in world suffering from the same thoughts. I use this forum for that and only that( and it has nothing to do with hair, Exodus).

The most important baby step is to finding something you are passion about and become an expert at it so you can share and teach your passion to others who are novices at whatever you are passionate about. Do volunteer work with charity events. Do something that is productive where someone else can benefit because of you. Find a career and focus on it and become passionate about it.

Just remember every situation has a solution and sometimes its going to take a lot of homework to find the solution. Sometimes you might find the solution is what you expected or not even wanted but in life things tend to work out to teach you how to evolve. If you fail, then you have to keep trying until you get a different result. If you don't then, insanity might be firing up in your brain. Although this forum may sometimes constitute as "group therapy", its up to you to decide how much time you need to spend here when there are so many more productive things you could be doing. So far, I got my level of focus up to about 80 per cent but there are 20 percent of the times when my depressed and anxious "automatic" brain take over and life becomes a big disappointment and I go to that "dark place" so many of you know. Sometimes option number one like Robbin Williams took sounds like a good idea but then I am able to rewire my brain and take control and realize the consequences are not worth the benefits. So, yes, even a low Norwood who has height, good looks, a great career and financially secure can feel worthless too. However, 80 percent of the time, he can feel on "top of the world".

I want as many people to chime in now and tell me what is you're percentage now and at what percent could you feel better about yourself.

 

[EvilLocks]

Just don't give up OP, I'm here to tell you it's going to pass, it always does. Maybe it's because it's Winter too, there's not much light and that's not good for our mood.

It's going to pass? Have you completely forgotten you used to be a bald man? Of course it's not going to pass, unless he gets a hair transplant like you. Also you just love to complain, don't you? You now have the life everyone here wants, but you still feel depressed? And when there's nothing to complain about, you'll complain about that as well?

 

[maher]

House, very good post. kudos.

Fred, I told you months before you had you hair transplant that this is going to happen.

Its the small things in life you must charish.

 

[2bald2young]

Evillocks, I don't understand why you deleted your first post it is true what you said honestly.

Op, I get what you mean in the last part. Depression=no job, no job=no money, no money in US=no treatment. Danm that must s*** although I don't think treatment would help anyway.

 

[maher]

2b2y is right, Elocks. That post was spot on!

 

[EvilLocks]

Suck it up Fred, there are people here who are depressed for a reason they cannot help, unlike you who have "it all" and still complain. Maybe you just like to complain for no reason, and when there's nothing to complain about you complain about that as well. It might just be the reason for your "depression" too. No it won't "pass" for OP, as a speaker of the truth like you say you should also speak the truth. It won't pass unless he gets it fixed like you with a hair transplant. And he may not be a candidate or have money so yeah it's not an easy fix. Go and live your life Fred, it seems so wonderful, why on earth are you here complaining when you now have what all of us wants?? I don't get it.

This post? I thought it might have been too harsh but maybe not?

 

[2bald2young]

It's not harsh, the point is that he has everything now he wanted and he describes his life to be perfect, a life most of us crave for. So why would you waste your time complaining about it instead of just enjoying it? You know, be happy again after all that s*** you had to go through?

 

[EvilLocks]

Even you admitted you EvilLocks were unhappy and clinically depressed before hair loss. So I don't think it's fair to throw stones at me in this case.

Yes, but not for no reason. I was depressed because I suffered General Anxiety Disorder and had panic attacks because I thought I was dying from cancer (literally). I became isolated because of my disorder hence depressed.

I'm not throwing stones at you either just wondering why you spend so much time on here with the life you describe. If I were in your shoes I would be running around like a maniac because of happiness, but of course I'm not you so...

And you are wrong, in my case happiness depends on hair. If I got my hair back I would be genuinely happy no doubt.

 

[EvilLocks]

You think you would be like this in my shoes, but it wears off quickly, you come back to having the "normal" problems people with no hair loss deal with.

I can relate to you more than you think. But don't think that if your hair loss problems were gone tomorrow, you would suddenly feel happy all the time for the rest of your life.

Do you have any idea how much I would pay to have "normal" problems? Like failing an exam, being dumped, being broke, having an argument, not getting the job i want +++ I think about it all the time. Hair loss has put me in hell, so of course if I was given a way out I would take it and never look back. I can honestly say I would never complain again and mean it. Maybe I would not be happy all the time but that would be fine with me. Just being a normal person with normal problems would be more than enough.

 

[Fena2000]

I've been paying attention lately to other women's hair, noticed some here and there. Then I think by myself, why is it they're not bothered by it. Maybe it's because I'm a perfectionist, almost in the sense of OCD, that's why it's been really though accepting what's going on. Every flaw I notice it depresses me, now of course my flaws are really noticeable which makes it ten times worse. And the fact I cant fix it just drives me crazy!

 

[EvilLocks]

And the fact I cant fix it just drives me crazy!

Tell me about it...

 

[2bald2young]

I just feel depressed that's all, you know depression doesn't need a reason right?

Unless you have a condition like chronic depression, yes you do need a reason to get depressed. But silly me, you said it so it must be true? :/

You know, you think if you had it all like me, you would be over the moon all the time, but that's just not reality, it's an idea you have.

Maybe not over the moon but probably at least not suicidal.

Happiness comes from within, not from external sources, not from your job, not your sexual conquests, and not your hair in the end.

Really fred? Really? happiness comes from within and not from your hair, well you are quick back into the hair doesn't matter group, I guess. Ofcourse external resources give happiness, how can someone be happy if he is completely homeless and alone for instance?

Dude it is great to hear that you have escaped this hell but please, just please don't turn into a giant c***!

I've been paying attention lately to other women's hair, noticed some here and there. Then I think by myself, why is it they're not bothered by it. Maybe it's because I'm a perfectionist, almost in the sense of OCD, that's why it's been really though accepting what's going on. Every flaw I notice it depresses me, now of course my flaws are really noticeable which makes it ten times worse. And the fact I cant fix it just drives me crazy!

Honestly a small recession is not the same as fully bald, especially as a women because most people don't even know that they can go bald.

 

[Ryath]

You're right, I'm going to take that back. It's just hard to see beyond your own case.

Of course hair does matter a lot, I won't lose sight of that. What I mean is: if you don't have hair, you're going to be generally miserable.

Having hair means that you will at least get a shot of having a normal life, but that doesn't mean your life will necessarily be great by default.

I see hair as the necessary foot in the door, if you don't have it, you won't (easily) have access to a great social life, love life and career.

Of course you know that there are a lot of NW1 people whose life is also completely miserable. But you could argue it's just a waste of good genes.

you dont have to be miserable cause you dont have hair i got a young friend who is complety bald, and women adore him, he is a sucesfull man in every way e posible. On the contrary i have seen guys with full total hair that they have a kinda loser attitude.

In your case you are depressed for some thing else and you were bald. People tend to manage life diffently