Psa: Women Do Not Magically Drop Their Standards As Soon As They Hit 30

[tracker54]

I see a lot of people here write stuff like:

"But you're over 30, noone gives a sh*t about balding then"
"I'll quit the meds when I'm 30"
"Women aren't as picky then, only young girls obsess over looks"
"Half of all men experience balding, the older you get, the less you'll care"

etc.

I'm 31, and of all my friends and acquaintances around my age, I'd say that maybe 20% look like they're balding. The advanced Norwood guys have been balding since they were young, while the majority look like gradual cases.

BUT with that said, women are still picky. At this point in life, most are fully employed, on the career track. They own their own house / apartment, are done with the partying lifestyle. If anything, they're even more picky about their parters, as they have less time to settle. Simply put: They must take less chances, because if they pick a dud, then 5-10 years down the line maybe they will be too old to start a family. My experience is that at my age, things move quite fast...I've seen many friends go from casual dating, to being engaged, pregnant fiancé, house and mortgage, in just 6-12 months.

And believe me, the dating pool is ridiculously skewed at this stage of life. There are so many losers out there. Bald, fat, missing teeth, unemployed, living on welfare, etc. One unfortunate trait, like baldness, can easily make you look like one of them.

So while women do get more desperate to find a mate, they do not lower their standards much, if anything. They are certainly more picky on some things (income, house, job, personality match), and can pick and choose if they're somewhat successful themselves.

Being a very handsome man in your 30's is the absolute peak of manhood, as far as dating goes. You can easily f*** around +/- 10 years your own age, and women will throw themselves at you. When you're 20, you're too young for certain women...when you're 40, you're too old for certain women...30? Perfect. And with Tinder etc. you don't even need to go out of your house to find these.

But for the rest of us? Things only get more difficult. One bad trait can easily cluster you with the other losers. Keep maxing your self, and be the best man that you can be. If the only thing that keeps you back is your hair, get that sh*t fixed.

 

[kj6723]

I always say people who think they won't care how they look because they're over 30 are delusional. It's a fairly common myth on here. As if your age turning to a certain number suddenly makes the mirror irrelevant

The long running joke you hear middle aged+ people make to each other about their age and how old they are getting is actually due to the insecurity that people wish they were younger and beautiful

With agemaxing, the key is to looksmax young, and maintain. The older you get the harder it will be to reverse the decline of your hair, body, skin

 

[cantara]

They are, deep down, still as picky. The question is if they try or even just pretend to drop their standards to get a partner a/o a father for their kid(s), having realized the guys they wish for will not give that to them.
I for one prefer to keep hoping for that miracle, hence remaining as picky, no matter how inadequate it is. At least I realise it, unlike all those average girls who think average guys are below their league.

 

[doubleindemnity]

Can you really date 10 years younger as a handsome 30 something? How would you pull it off?

 

[cantara]

Can you really date 10 years younger as a handsome 30 something? How would you pull it off?

It‘s definitely possible. Just be handsome and qualities like maturity, financial stability, smartness will be see in the positive light handsomeness creates.

 

[doubleindemnity]

It‘s definitely possible. Just be handsome and qualities like maturity, financial stability, smartness will be see in the positive light handsomeness creates.

But where do you find these women? I can't set dates with women more than 4 years younger on apps and it can't possibly be easier as a man over 30. So you'd need to learn game, right?

 

[cantara]

But where do you find these women? I can't set dates with women more than 4 years younger on apps and it can't possibly be easier as a man over 30. So you'd need to learn game, right?

Look, I‘ve done the usual frustrated-guy-Tinder experiment with my age (36) and pics of an 8. Once I texted as I would normally interact, the other time being cheap and super direct.
Interestingly (and in defence of women), there WAS a big difference in terms of success. Basically, only (some) girls 5 and below would put up with the latter.
What stung me: when I was myself, girls laughed left and right, loved the interaction, really got hooked. Among them girls between 20-26. Girls 24 up were not only open but even asking for meetings. Life as a 36-year-old can be fantastic, but I suppose you have to be handsome, being decent-looking will trigger the usual excuse that they may even believe in: he‘s too old.
The experiment also made me notice I do appear im 36-year-old‘s search, so that excuse I used to come up with had to say goodbye...

 

[Yakitori]

Only women who are desperate to have kids drop their standards as they get into their 30s.

 

[Dontwannabeabetabob]

I've always laughed at the women hitting the wall theory...Its complete bullshit. I rent a house from a woman who's 54. She gets hit up by young Chads constantly. She refers to these men as toys in her toy box. She's shown me her dating profiles and messages. It's pure suicide fuel. Makes me feel like sh*t tbh. So, no, the "wall" is a myth as I've witnessed it. These guys are legit model types and are in high positions like doctors, chiropractors, engineers, etc. It's over.

 

[barfacan]

they hit on her because they think shes easy meat. Ugly/old b****s get hit on connnnnnstantly.

You guys really are just sit-at-home computer fappers. That's the best thing about this upcoming generation -- extremely Low T, excessive masturbation, and 0 social skills leaves the young girls begging for mature dominant alpha dick. There just aint enough chads their own age to go around.

 

[JohnsonDDG]

Women hit the wall in their 30s: some at 30 whereas some may be mid 30s.

Maybe a very small percentage stay good looking in their 40s.

Examples:

Men seldom hit the wall, they tend to decline slowly over a longer period of time.

Also, women tend to get baby rabbies in their 30s which leads them to search for a reliable, somewhat beta man.

There are only so many chads with good jobs (maybe 2 or 3% of the population) so eventually they will stop hoping chad will settle for them and they will find someone who is more realistic.

That doesn't mean they will suddenly date some unlce fester lookalike, but it does mean they will stop searching for perfection.

 

[Prop533]

Your landlady sounds like a real prize.

A lot of guys swipe right on everyone. How many of those guys do you think are actually interested in her, except as a potential one-night stand when they have nothing better lined up?

Meanwhile, she thinks matches actually mean something, and she’s parading it around to feel better about herself. Delusional.

 

[sunchyme1]

I'm even in the top 1% of my country by income.

i can believe that

what line of work you in?

 

[IdealForehead]

i can believe that

what line of work you in?

Sorry but my paranoia and excessive honesty on this forum prevent me from comfortably saying anything too particular about myself.

So let's go with mid level drug cartel boss perhaps. (And Luo is an associate, that's why I try to send him business.)

(not srs)

 

[sunchyme1]

Sorry but my paranoia and excessive honesty on this forum prevent me from comfortably saying anything too particular about myself.

So let's go with mid level drug cartel boss perhaps. (Luo is an associate, that's why I try to send him business.)

yeah good money in that sh*t

dude are you from the us?

i just binged watched all 5 seasons of the wire the past few weeks

f*****g great show

 

[shookwun]

30 is a grey area for dating as far as excellence, and risk. If a women decides to settle, she is still relatively young but at the same time she needs to make an educated decision on being with you as time goes fast and a few years can mean the difference between being young to now being an older individual. Where as when you date in your twenties, it's easy to lose a few here and there because after all you are still young and care-free. The older you get, it seems like the investment to be with someone needs to be taken with more precaution as people start wanting kids sooner then later, responsibilities arise and you are entering a career peak.


I would say that being thirty is no different then 25 as far as physical aesthetics, but there are more risks involved with the decisions you make on partners. Going from 25-30 is not the same as going from 30-35. Suddenly your priorities shift much faster, and you cannot afford to make mistakes then you could in your twenties with the people you surround yourselves around. At the same time, you have more flexibility as most people at this age have paid there debts, have financial privilege and start to bear the fruits of there labour. And most importantly you still look young and fresh if you maintain a solid head of hair, and are in decent shape.


I could see the biggest challenge being that the clock ticks much faster, and women don't want to burden themselves with subpar men that they have semi-interest in. because ultimately wasting a few years for a guy you thought you might like is far worse then being single and strong with your decisions. Which could explain why most women rather stay single then be with guys they don't really want to be with.

As far as partying is concerned, this growing out phase is often exhibited by people that were never desirable to begin with. I often see beautiful women going out every weekend who are in there thirties. the validation that comes with being wanted is what fuels people to continue a young lift style. which men also exhibit if they have great hair, and nice physique in there thirties. it's men who let themselves go, and bald that will spew the same bullshit of settling down. where as the real reason is they are preumptively disqualified from there lack of desirability.

 

[Dontwannabeabetabob]

Do you guys think it's better to LDAR now? Versus continuing to try and have all those efforts go to waste when you could've came to terms with it years ago? I don't want to keep deluding myself, so part of me wants to just get used to it now instead of my 30s.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

It's a look-elsewhere effect.

A thirty-five year-old ex-Stacy is very likely to tell you that she no longer cares about looks, and in her case it's true. That is because she will be dating a man who is less hot than some of the guys that she slept with at 18, but that he has a better personality.

It's all true but that is because she will be willfully oblivious to a few factors. The first is that she can no longer pull the hot men that she did when she was 18. Moreover, though she likely fucked a hotter guy when she was 18 (which she remembers fondly), she probably also fucked many lesser men, those are the ones that she's "blocked from memory", but having done so she has a distorted view of what she once pulled (look elsewhere effect). The second (complementary) is that older men have better personalities (in some sense) simply because they've lived more, accumulated more money, etc. If she's dating the same percentile of men in her age group at 35 as she was at 18, she will eb dating men with "better personalities", which will enable her to believe that she's no longer shallow like she was 15 years prior. Lastly, even when she's evaluating 35 year-old men, she will have standards when assessing within that group. However, to her these will be appear as "not caring about looks", simply because the standards will be lower than when she was young.

Some of the terms for personality are also about looks in the abstract. For example, "knows how to dress well" is a composite of "has an athletic body" and "has money," as it is extremely difficult to dress well without a good body and without money.

 

[Bklyn_23]

Can you really date 10 years younger as a handsome 30 something? How would you pull it off?

I dated and had sex with 5 girls age 22-26 three summers ago as a 37 year old. All but one of them approached me first, and the other one made her interest obvious (two on a singles cruise, and the other 3 at bars/lounges). One of the girls on our second date asked why I didn’t have a girlfriend, and said to me “you’re so good looking, you could have any girl you want” - I won’t lie: as a man approaching middle age, it felt great to hear that from an attractive 25 year old. So yes, it is possible. I’m roughly an 8, for reference. 2.5 years ago, when all this happened, I was still likely an 8.5 despite being 37. That’s just facially, mind you - I’m also a very broad, well built and 6’1”, so maybe that also helps bump me up a bit. More hair loss and minor general aging since then have dropped me half a point lol.

 

[IdealForehead]

I dated and had sex with 5 girls age 22-26 three summers ago as a 37 year old. All but one of them approached me first, and the other one made her interest obvious (two on a singles cruise, and the other 3 at bars/lounges). One of the girls on our second date asked why I didn’t have a girlfriend, and said to me “you’re so good looking, you could have any girl you want” - I won’t lie: as a man approaching middle age, it felt great to hear that from an attractive 25 year old. So yes, it is possible. I’m roughly an 8, for reference. 2.5 years ago, when all this happened, I was still likely an 8.5 despite being 37. That’s just facially, mind you - I’m also a very broad, well built and 6’1”, so maybe that also helps bump me up a bit. More hair loss and minor general aging since then have dropped me half a point lol.

Jesus Christ dude. You're an ultraChad. What was it like in your youth? Actually maybe don't tell us. LOL f***