Who is motivated even more by hair loss?

[uncomfortable man]

I don't want everyone to love me I just don't want everyone to hate me. Does that make enough sense to you lot?

And chris, that last statement had nothing to do with hair so your comment about trump cards doesn't apply in this case.

And it's people in general not just women but of course here I go repeating myself again.

 

[DannyBoyy]

I don't want everyone to love me I just don't want everyone to hate me. Does that make enough sense to you lot?

And chris, that last statement had nothing to do with hair so your comment about trump cards doesn't apply in this case.

And it's people in general not just women but of course here I go repeating myself again.

Yes we understand that UC Man you have said MANY times you dont want to be hated by others etc etc you said you wanted to be perceived attractive to others hence why i said what i said.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

UCMan, that's why I said it was like that. Because it is. Because Zeroes is or isn't married doesn't mean he has no idea about long term relationships. As I said, I have no idea what his marital or parental status is.

 

[uncomfortable man]

you said you wanted to be perceived attractive to others hence why i said what i said.

No I didn't, I was speaking in the third person. Reading comprehension is your friend.

 

[DannyBoyy]

No I didn't, I was speaking in the third person. Reading comprehension is your friend.

"Just because a couple are married doesn't mean they just stop wanting to be perceived as attractive" yes true you didnt say it but its obvious what you ment otherwise who are "they" you are on about? third person maybe...but its still obvious what you ment.

 

[Scarred4Life]

If i had a girlfriend/wife i would only care about making her happy,nt pleasing others.

So if she went away on vacation, you would stop taking showers and go to work smelling like a pig because you wouldn't care about pleasing others.

- - - Updated - - -

. Because Zeroes is or isn't married

Her isn't married. Look at the reason he banned BBAS and do the math for yourself.

- - - Updated - - -

Yes we understand that UC Man you have said MANY times you dont want to be hated by others etc etc you said you wanted to be perceived attractive to others hence why i said what i said.

He said he doesn't want to stand out as an outcast. That is completely understandable even if he is married. A marriage isn't a cacoon. We all deal with other people in our lives.

 

[zeroes]

I'm not married and I am not involved in a relationship.

What I am trying to say, is that I would only care about being attractive to my partner. It doesn't mean I would stop showering or dressing a certain way.

If you are attractive to your partner chances are, plenty of other chicks are going to find you attractive. Not something that would bother me personally.

Back to UCman, am I the only one that thinks he is paranoid? Everyone hates him because he is bald. Sounds like someone that is paranoid to me. His comments in the past have always made me suspicious that he is paranoid. He is like S4L but slightly less paranoid.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

He is paranoid. That comes through loud and clear. I don't blame him for it, but it seems strange that a 40 year old guy is hounded and treated so poorly for being bald. It's not like it's rare being bald at that age.

S4L what the hell are you trying to say? That because Zeroes doesn't like homophobia, he must be gay? I despise homophobia and prejuidice, does that mean that I'm gay as well?

 

[zeroes]

Her isn't married. Look at the reason he banned BBAS and do the math for yourself.

I am not gay, and I didn't ban BBSA originally, I accidentally unbanned his original account. I banned his new account he created and re-banned his old account.

Stop changing the facts.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

I don't know why he's so obsessed with BBSA, other than trying to wind people up by constantly going on about him. It's pretty clear S4L has a problem with gay people by what he writes.

 

[Primo]

If we're going to be lazy with our physical appearance and/or career ambitions then why should women have respect for us/find us attractive?

So sick of hearing these half-assed, (not to mention hypocritical!) cop out excuses!

A bald guy who is taking the trouble to get into good shape and dress well isn't "compensating" he's simply having respect for himself.
Gotta love the Hypocrisy on this forum!

According to many here if a guy has a physical defect such as male pattern baldness, he shouldn't bother to "compensate" through staying in shape and wearing good clothes, but should still obviously be deserving of female attraction...

Yet on the otherhand, if a woman for example has an average looking face, but doesn't bother to compensate, through wearing nice clothes, keeping her weight under control and making her hair and complexion look nice.... then the same HLTers would label her a fat, ugly tramp, who has no repect for herself and is undeserving of any male attention period....

Wake up guys seriously!

 

[HairGuru22]

Zeroes why did you ban him? This was the place where he could vent and share his misfortunes and thoughts, albeit negative but realistic to a certain degree.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

See the why so much hate thread. Not so sure it was Zeroes.

 

[Michael84]

No, I'm not trying to garnish positive attention from anyone but my wife but it still hurts my ego when that woman literally laughed out loud upon seeing me at the supermarket. Or just annoying in general when it feels like every other person who passes me on the street is either sneering at me in disgust or snickering at my bald head. Again, it's about conformity and not sticking out like a sore thumb. Just because I get love at home doesn't mean I don't feel the hate directed at me when I'm out and uncovered. I don't know how many more times or ways I can explain this!

That just proves that you're a little bit deranged with hair loss. There are dozens of bald people of different age around in streets. No matter how shallow those bitchs could be, they just can't walk and laugh on every bald guy they see, unless they escaped from mental assylum. You are not 16 and bald, you're not disfigured or something like that, so there is no reason for them to pay excessive attention to you. It's just in your mind, when every strange look or behaviour is projected on your bald head.
It could happen once or twice accidently depending on the situation, when you were a really unlucky victim of meeting some stupid people, but you say like it happens ten times every day.

 

[zeroes]

He was banned for bigotry and I did it as my last act as mod. That is a rule that was set, bigotry = instant ban.

I wasn't kicked off the team I asked to leave, had it happened earlier I wouldn't be the one banning him.

I've already thanked admin and Cassin for their support and opportunity, and hope they find someone better than myself as the next mod

 

[uncomfortable man]

That just proves that you're a little bit deranged with hair loss. There are dozens of bald people of different age around in streets. No matter how shallow those bitchs could be, they just can't walk and laugh on every bald guy they see, unless they escaped from mental assylum. You are not 16 and bald, you're not disfigured or something like that, so there is no reason for them to pay excessive attention to you. It's just in your mind, when every strange look or behaviour is projected on your bald head.
It could happen once or twice accidently depending on the situation, when you were a really unlucky victim of meeting some stupid people, but you say like it happens ten times every day.

I will conceed that my spiritual well being is not what it should be but I am not crazy, maybe a little paranoid as you say but it is justified paranioa. I'm sure people's responses to my baldness has given me social anxiety disorder but if it weren't for this bald head I would look alot younger than my actual age. I don't have bad skin, beer belly, turkey neck like many men get when they reach middle age. So I do in fact look like a late twenty/ early thirty something guy with hair loss. And every now and then I see another bald guy, certainly not as frequent as you would suggest so that makes it all the worse in terms of feeling like a minority. The overwhelming majority of people I see out in public have hair. Whenever I go out uncovered I always get looks and reactions but never when I am wearing a hat. Deductive logic tells me then that people are responding to my baldness and nothing else as I don't have any other glaring flaws that would attract unwanted attention from people.
"Paranoia is just reality on a finer scale." BTW.

 

[buckeyeblitz]

Great thread.

You're right, there is a lot of negativity on here. Bear in mind that like many mediums, you are more likely to hear people venting than expressing contentedness. That's just the nature of human behavior. The reason I point this out is to illustrate that most bald and balding men are not feeling hopeless all of the time. One mistake I have made before is letting the negativity get to me, which leads to me feeling like I have no control over things. Just be supportive to others when you can and understand that although you do not agree with how they are handling their emotions, everyone deals with things at their own pace.

While I don't think my baldness has affected my life positively, I do agree that it has been a motivator for me. One of the first replies in here suggested that you are "overcompensating" with the things that you mentioned in your original post. It's true, but there is NOTHING wrong or illogical about that. It makes sense to overcompensate in areas that you have control over, in fact, it would make very little sense not to.

The more I can keep my mind off of it, and the more I focus my efforts on productive tasks, the happier I am. I'm also more likely to get attraction from women if I'm applying myself in other areas.

Sure, losing your hair is going to reduce your odds with women. Although I can't cite scientific evidence for that (even though it may exist), few would dispute that. But just because your odds are reduces, doesn't make it impossible. Everything in life comes at a price, and you have to work for everything. We might have to work a bit harder, but there's nothing stopping us from being happy and leading productive lives, other than ourselves. The choice between making the most out of it or throwing your hands up and saying it's not worth it is a decision we must all face. Likely, we will all decide different things at different times. Even the most motivated and positive person is going to get down about it every now and again. Likewise, even the most self loathing and unmotivated balding men will still have good days, and days when they overcome their fears and doubts.