Is anyone self conscious of their height as well as their hair?

[TheEscapist]

I just heard back from the doctor after getting my growth plates examined, and its official. I'm all growed up. I am 17, and at 5 foot 11 and a half inches, I'm no longer going up.

For some reasons, I've generally always been lacking in confidence or at least security in my appearance. Even before hair loss kicked in.
One thing I feel lacking in is height. I really hate being under 6 foot. I feel like if I'm not 6 or 6'2, I'm short.

I hate my vanity, and I hope and pray one day I'll grow out of it (haha), but for now I'm stuck worrying about becoming the short, bald 20 year old that I expect I'll become.. =/

Does anyone else here feel unhappy about their height? Or feel anything at all about any of the above.

 

[Breaking Bald]

Are you ****ing serious?? 5'11 and 1/2 and you are complaining, I am 5'8. Get a ****ing grip! Ridiculous...You are well above the average height and far from short for god sake!

 

[Quantum Cat]

5'11 is taller than average you nutter. :laugh:

LOL can't wait till HPM sees this thread - he'll sh!t a brick

 

[TheEscapist]

Its taller than average, but it isn't by any means "tall".
I'm sorry if I offended you Breaking Bald, I have a tendency to let my issues keep me from being wary of the possibility that others may feel the same or worse about themselves.
I was a swimmer, and I was shorter than most of the other guys. I don't know, I know height doesn't matter at the end of the day so much. 5'8, 5'11, 6'3, you'll still be happy and unhappy and lucky and unlucky and smart and dumb and good and bad and laid or not laid. Its just, I feel like I need to be the ideal male.

It sounds completely illogical, and it pretty much is, but I feel like if I were taller, I would have at least one physical aspect that made me stand out. In a couple years, I'll be bald at age 20 in college. Mostly all of my "good looks" will be gone. I'll have to rely on having an ideal body only, and I feel like if I'm still looking upwards at 6'2 guys or above-average-height women in heels, I'll be just another bald guy, compensating with muscle. At least if I had like, a solid "tallness", I could take comfort that I'd stand out for that..

 

[DannyBoyy]

Its taller than average, but it isn't by any means "tall".
I'm sorry if I offended you Breaking Bald, I have a tendency to let my issues keep me from being wary of the possibility that others may feel the same or worse about themselves.
I was a swimmer, and I was shorter than most of the other guys. I don't know, I know height doesn't matter at the end of the day so much. 5'8, 5'11, 6'3, you'll still be happy and unhappy and lucky and unlucky and smart and dumb and good and bad and laid or not laid. Its just, I feel like I need to be the ideal male.

It sounds completely illogical, and it pretty much is, but I feel like if I were taller, I would have at least one physical aspect that made me stand out. In a couple years, I'll be bald at age 20 in college. Mostly all of my "good looks" will be gone. I'll have to rely on having an ideal body only, and I feel like if I'm still looking upwards at 6'2 guys or above-average-height women in heels, I'll be just another bald guy, compensating with muscle. At least if I had like, a solid "tallness", I could take comfort that I'd stand out for that..

Dude you was a swimmer thats a good thing what "stands out" for you get into things like hobbies or something if you want to "stand out"...its just a height there always be someone taller then you anyway im 6.1 or 6.2 and my mate is about 6.5...anyway 5.11 is tall enough so i dont get what you are worrying about.

 

[Quantum Cat]

I'm 5'8 - 5'9 and I've never felt remotely inadequate about my height. Other features maybe

 

[DoctorHouse]

Its taller than average, but it isn't by any means "tall".
I'm sorry if I offended you Breaking Bald, I have a tendency to let my issues keep me from being wary of the possibility that others may feel the same or worse about themselves.
I was a swimmer, and I was shorter than most of the other guys. I don't know, I know height doesn't matter at the end of the day so much. 5'8, 5'11, 6'3, you'll still be happy and unhappy and lucky and unlucky and smart and dumb and good and bad and laid or not laid. Its just, I feel like I need to be the ideal male.

It sounds completely illogical, and it pretty much is, but I feel like if I were taller, I would have at least one physical aspect that made me stand out. In a couple years, I'll be bald at age 20 in college. Mostly all of my "good looks" will be gone. I'll have to rely on having an ideal body only, and I feel like if I'm still looking upwards at 6'2 guys or above-average-height women in heels, I'll be just another bald guy, compensating with muscle. At least if I had like, a solid "tallness", I could take comfort that I'd stand out for that..

Trust me, your thinking is very unhealthy. I know first hand how you feel. And trust me, it can destroy your youth and your life. It did mine and now I can't get it back. Just remember this fact. There is always going to be someone taller, better looking,have better head of hair, more athletic,smarter, funnier, more muscular, and I can go on an on but there one is thing that can make you stand out. If you invent something that can change the world, you will stand out. Everyone will remember you. Bill Gates and Steve Jobs were not born with perfect genetics either. However, they used their brain to stand out and changed our world for ever. Just remember, your future is not going to depend on your height or your looks or your hair its going to depend on what you make of yourself.

When I was your age I was about 6 foot 1( we do shrink slightly as you get older) and to me I thought I was short too. I still wish I was at least 6 ft 3. I wanted to stand out too. I wanted to be the best looking every where I went. However keep saying this to yourself: To compare only leads to despair. Envy is a life destroyer. Accept the genes you were dealt as its not going to change. You can get buffed all you want but the guy next to you will be more buffed than you. I struggle everyday wishing I was something I can never be. However, I chose a career that makes a huge difference on people's lives. And people can care less about my height, my looks or my hair, they just care that I can make a difference for them and become a hero.

You are only a half inch under 6 ft, with most shoes, you will stand 6ft or more anyway. No matter what, the average person will see you as tall. Learn how to be entertaining, funny and interesting. The internet is full of ways to help you do that. I have a very hot looking girl interested in me who is half my age practically. She says she finds me very intriguing and different from most guys. I stand out, not for my looks but for what comes out of my mouth. Remember that too.

 

[TheEscapist]

I wish I could be less consumed by vanity. I really do. I know I have better qualities, redeeming ones that people do enjoy. I just hate that my self-consumed need to be good looking is almost always there. Its enigmatic to an extent, because I'm generally a deep thinker and feeler, and yet I'm so concerned about my appearance. I hate constantly checking and worrying about my hair. I hate always putting so much emphasis on being good looking.

Don't get me wrong, I can still enjoy life and come out of myself sometimes. Its just, a hindrance on my life experience that I wish I didn't have.
I always thought myself better than this.

 

[DoctorHouse]

I wish I could be less consumed by vanity. I really do. I know I have better qualities, redeeming ones that people do enjoy. I just hate that my self-consumed need to be good looking is almost always there. Its enigmatic to an extent, because I'm generally a deep thinker and feeler, and yet I'm so concerned about my appearance. I hate constantly checking and worrying about my hair. I hate always putting so much emphasis on being good looking.

Don't get me wrong, I can still enjoy life and come out of myself sometimes. Its just, a hindrance on my life experience that I wish I didn't have.
I always thought myself better than this.

Your thoughts and my thoughts are identical. Its called BDD. Read up about it and you will understand yourself better. You definitely seem very well educated so I know you will evolve eventually. It will be tough and sometimes your thinking will never change even over 20 years but as long as you can snap out of that thinking most of the time you will be just fine. You might even be like me and come back and try to help people like you prevent making the same mistake.

I wish I had a mentor that helped me change my perspective at your age. You are lucky you did not have to be 17 year in my decade. Everything we talk about in this room would be considered "gay". If you blow dried your hair, colored or high lighted your hair, wore an earring, or groomed, used hair products, never had a girlfriend, were a virgin, you would be considered "gay" Now most people are accepted no matter what they do. I think its great more people can be open about themselves and come to a forum and discuss their feelings and rant about things in my day would be considered a big NO NO. I guess maybe I post here to make up for something I never got to do at a young age. I am trying to relive a time I only wish was like the present. Although, the lack of cell phones was actually a plus. Having to keep so many things to yourself as a kid to protect your reputation was very tough. I must say internet forums are a great invention for teenagers like you.

 

[TheEscapist]

I've looked up BDD before, and I remember that I was surprised to find something that fit my symptoms so well. It makes sense, because I've had difficulty with OCD and depression for years. BDD is very close to OCD I believe. I've been seeing a psychologist about my issues for over a year or so now. It helps, but its mainly an outlet for me to talk about the things in my head.

Yes, I am lucky to live in a time where you don't have to be alone in these things. Some things though, I still choose to keep internal. I don't want to burden the people in my life any more than I do with my worries and preoccupations. My parents especially have become really annoyed with my worrying about hair, height, etc. With good reason! I can't imagine its fun being on the other end of a child of your own who is stuck inside his head worrying about things so often.

So I have outlets, and I have my girlfriend who gives me a lot of confidence and support. But I do want to one day put this beast down for good. Surgically remove the doubt and worry from my head, so to speak. And if I'm lucky, I'll come out of it with a better vigor for life.

But at the same time, I'd also like to have my hair... Can you have both, do you think? Can you take propecia every day for years on end, and still be free of preoccupation and worry over your hair? Since there's no cure, can you ever really let it go if you're still trying to treat it?

 

[DoctorHouse]

I've looked up BDD before, and I remember that I was surprised to find something that fit my symptoms so well. It makes sense, because I've had difficulty with OCD and depression for years. BDD is very close to OCD I believe. I've been seeing a psychologist about my issues for over a year or so now. It helps, but its mainly an outlet for me to talk about the things in my head.

Yes, I am lucky to live in a time where you don't have to be alone in these things. Some things though, I still choose to keep internal. I don't want to burden the people in my life any more than I do with my worries and preoccupations. My parents especially have become really annoyed with my worrying about hair, height, etc. With good reason! I can't imagine its fun being on the other end of a child of your own who is stuck inside his head worrying about things so often.

So I have outlets, and I have my girlfriend who gives me a lot of confidence and support. But I do want to one day put this beast down for good. Surgically remove the doubt and worry from my head, so to speak. And if I'm lucky, I'll come out of it with a better vigor for life.

But at the same time, I'd also like to have my hair... Can you have both, do you think? Can you take propecia every day for years on end, and still be free of preoccupation and worry over your hair? Since there's no cure, can you ever really let it go if you're still trying to treat it?

As long as you can suppress your OCD/BDD, you can treat it and let it go. However, there are going to be days when it will bother you when you see men over 50 years old who still have a perfect NW1 and their original hair color. I feel most secure when I am in room when I feel I have the "advantage" in the genes department. I am glad you have a girlfriend as that at least will help keep your self esteem some what higher as long as she supports you. Unfortunately I had girlfriends turn on me and stab me in the back when I was a teenager and that really destroyed my self esteem. Like I said, it was tough being a teen in my decade.

As far as your hair situation, even with treatment there is no guarantee you will slow male pattern baldness down. You already have some very visible signs of receding( I actually have less receding than you do and I am still bothered by my situation). So you have to be prepared for that as well. I thought I was safe when I got past a certain age, but I learned you are never safe from male pattern baldness no matter what age. I read all the time on this forum how some guy's dad went from a NW2 to a NW6 starting in his 50's or 60's. People with BDD always care about things like their hair so that is very scary to know I have no security about my hair.

 

[TheEscapist]

Yeah, I'm very lucky to have her.

If it were down to you (I know its down to me, but I'm just wondering your opinion) would you suggest I take propecia, or give up? I can cope with my hair line as it is now. I can work with it. The only thing holding me back is just the idea of altering my hormones. I can't grow a full beard yet, and I don't know if it'll stop my ability to do so. I don't know if it'll effect my "size" down there. These are all things that aren't listed on the side effects list, but are the nightmares of Propeciahelp.com articles.
Though I don't think they're entirely credible, they still worry me.

 

[DoctorHouse]

Yeah, I'm very lucky to have her.

If it were down to you (I know its down to me, but I'm just wondering your opinion) would you suggest I take propecia, or give up? I can cope with my hair line as it is now. I can work with it. The only thing holding me back is just the idea of altering my hormones. I can't grow a full beard yet, and I don't know if it'll stop my ability to do so. I don't know if it'll effect my "size" down there. These are all things that aren't listed on the side effects list, but are the nightmares of Propeciahelp.com articles.
Though I don't think they're entirely credible, they still worry me.

As long as you have too many doubts, its best you just stick with Rogaine and topical spironolactone IF you want to try to fight MBP. I first used Revivogen and I did well with it. Its worth a try. If I were in your shoes, I know I would still have tried Propecia and monitored it carefully with my doctor. I have preached many times on this forum that you will never know what the outcome of YOUR own situation will be unless you experiment on yourself. However, if you have too many doubts and concerns about a treatment then do NOT try it. In your case, I would get a baseline of my hormones and then start taking it. I would recheck my hormones 3 months after taking it to see if there are any concerns. If I see some potential concerns I would stop immediately. If not progress to 6 months and re-evaluate. When I took accutane, I had to be monitored too. In this case, I would get monitored as well. If you have the ability to accept your fate, no matter what, then its time to leave this forum now. Otherwise, it will be harder to accept your fate.

 

[Exodus2011]

Imagine being 5'6 everytime u worry about your height

As for me, i imagine what it wud be like to be 5'2" if i ever worry about my height

I think about how bad shorter guys wud wanna slap me for worrying

Most guys are ahead of me on the height bell curve but im at least taller than most girls, some guys dont have that luxury

 

[hairplz]

Height is even more important than hair loss.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

Least that's something you can be thankful for eh Hairplz?

 

[TheEscapist]

Though I do think height matters, I think Hairplz's post was pretty stupid. I agree that the 6'1-6'4 ranged guys definitely have an easier time with the ladies. But at 5'11.5, 170lbs, still have a semi-decent amount of hair on my head, I have stood a chance with a lot of pretty girls, hooked up with/dated a few, and have settled in a relationship with a really beautiful hot girl.
So, you don't NEED to be 6'2 to be fortunate or lucky. Shorter guys have a harder time, but if they can make a living, find happiness/love/sex/what have you while STILL being not height-gifted, than good on them for doing things that unfortunately are not genetically easy for them.
Girls probably love guys who, despite maybe being on the shorter side, don't have small-man syndrome or whatever. It demonstrates a maturity of mind that I haven't yet reached. And that Hairplz's post-author definitely hasn't reached.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

I've met guys around my height who do have the dreaded short man syndrome. But then I've also met others who don't. It's pretty obvious when you're short, so if someone makes a snide comment, a well placed sarcastic comment, showing you appreciate how observant they are is usually sufficient. Some people make comments without thinking, just as they would do over other physical differences. It's not right, but you have to look at the context. Getting angry about it doesn't do anyone any good. It just confirms to snidey people they've got under your skin, and in my case they haven't

 

[Betapaw]

You could return to your doctor and ask him about such cases as the NBA player Dennis Rodman, who was 5"6 as a Freshmen in High School, but by the time he graduated Highschool he was 6"8. Males do not stop growing until their 20's.

 

[ChrisW1980uk]

Betapaw do you mean me? I'm 32, not going to grow any more now