I Realized Something About Human Physical Attractiveness

Trichosan

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It's hard to expect really young people to not be narcissistic and materialistic. A 16 year old is a child emotionally. I've also seen where the guy takes off after getting married when the girl turns into a whale.
 

Cue Bald

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i think she didn't find bald men attractive and she panicked thinking she would be stuck for the rest of her life with a man she didn't find attractive. she wanted to have fun, go on holiday etc with a man she found attractive and have sex with him. she was a pretty, sweet looking girl and before this all happened i thought she was a really kind girl.
she must have thought "i am in the prime of my life" and looked around and saw all these hot guys and yet she was with a man who looked like he was in his 40's.
he really did look terrible. he was pale, old looking skin, NW7, a bit chubby; just terrible. he didn't do anything to try to stop it either. if it was me, i'd have been on finasteride, min; losing weight, fixing my skin but his aggressive male pattern baldness (NW1 - NW7 in a year) probably wouldn't have been stopped even by finasteride.
 

disfiguredyoungman

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It's hard to expect really young people to not be narcissistic and materialistic. A 16 year old is a child emotionally. I've also seen where the guy takes off after getting married when the girl turns into a whale.

Well turning into a whale really is a display of a lack of commitment to the relationship and completely under your control. Not comparable at all.
 

Trichosan

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Well turning into a whale really is a display of a lack of commitment to the relationship and completely under your control. Not comparable at all.

Dumping someone because they're losing hair is certainly a lack of commitment to a relationship too I would think.
 

BalderBaldyBald

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i think she didn't find bald men attractive and she panicked thinking she would be stuck for the rest of her life with a man she didn't find attractive. she wanted to have fun, go on holiday etc with a man she found attractive and have sex with him. she was a pretty, sweet looking girl and before this all happened i thought she was a really kind girl.
she must have thought "i am in the prime of my life" and looked around and saw all these hot guys and yet she was with a man who looked like he was in his 40's.
he really did look terrible. he was pale, old looking skin, NW7, a bit chubby; just terrible. he didn't do anything to try to stop it either. if it was me, i'd have been on finasteride, min; losing weight, fixing my skin but his aggressive male pattern baldness (NW1 - NW7 in a year) probably wouldn't have been stopped even by finasteride.

I experienced the exact opposite, hooked up at highschool, he went NW7 very agressively, they got married after that, still happily married and she still in love, despite the fact that he sleeps with other girls in her back.

Life is full of suprises
 

Roberto_72

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I experienced the exact opposite, hooked up at highschool, he went NW7 very agressively, they got married after that, still happily married and she still in love, despite the fact that he sleeps with other girls in her back.

Life is full of suprises
But in fact matters of affection are completely separated from rationality.
The girl might have ditched the husband even if he had been Norwood-1.

What really makes the difference in my experience is the competition they feel from other women.

If a woman thinks other women would want to f**k you, that you are some sort of prize, you are more likely to keep your relationship.

If they feel they are not competing, you might be left in the cold sooner or later.
 

Saurabhaj

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i think she didn't find bald men attractive and she panicked thinking she would be stuck for the rest of her life with a man she didn't find attractive. she wanted to have fun, go on holiday etc with a man she found attractive and have sex with him. she was a pretty, sweet looking girl and before this all happened i thought she was a really kind girl.
she must have thought "i am in the prime of my life" and looked around and saw all these hot guys and yet she was with a man who looked like he was in his 40's.
he really did look terrible. he was pale, old looking skin, NW7, a bit chubby; just terrible. he didn't do anything to try to stop it either. if it was me, i'd have been on finasteride, min; losing weight, fixing my skin but his aggressive male pattern baldness (NW1 - NW7 in a year) probably wouldn't have been stopped even by finasteride.

Slow down...
Stephen might start crying after reading ^ post.
 

BalderBaldyBald

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But in fact matters of affection are completely separated from rationality.
The girl might have ditched the husband even if he had been Norwood-1.

What really makes the difference in my experience is the competition they feel from other women.

If a woman thinks other women would want to f**k you, that you are some sort of prize, you are more likely to keep your relationship.

If they feel they are not competing, you might be left in the cold sooner or later.

True that, i guess trophies work for both genders after all
 

Panda89

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Also bad incurable physical health can strike any time, suddenly hair won't matter as much, at least for me. Appreciate the present in some shape or form, looking for some positivity is no bad thing. Once I saw a blind man taking a breather and almost trying to feel the environment. Felt like he was trying to feel the wind on his skin, changes in smell, subtle light changes in his eyes or maybe with his feet. Initially I was sad but I thought to myself, he still has a purpose and joy, he's "trying to take it all in" as best as he can.



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I used to live right beside a small neighborhood park where a lot of the local people would visit every day just before the sun set. during the time that i lived there i was at my lowest; I was working a very demanding job that drained my soul dry, my sudden change in appearance completely destroyed my confidence, and i stopped going out, stopped making friends, just stopped trying in life. I lost desires to plan for the future.. all i wanted to do was lie in bed when i get home, and i dreaded waking up in the morning. Like i absolutely DREADED opening my eyes every single morning. drowned myself in weed and booze until i felt numb and indifferent. one day as i was about to pull into my drive way after a long day at work, i saw a middle aged mom walking toward the park with her daughter. i noticed right awaythere was definitely something wrong with the kid, who was probably around 11-13 years old. She wasn't walking properly, heavily leaning to one side. her face was lopsided, mouth slightly opened. I turned down my music just in time to hear her scream at the top of her lungs at her mom and only then i realized she was mentally challenged. I don't think she was able to communicate with her mom at all, she didn't use her words she just..made noises loudly at the mother. And then i saw the mother's face, she was smiling at the girl, trying to calm her down while walking slowly beside her to match her pace. she was so patient, so full of love. they must've just moved there because after that i saw them almost every day.. going to the park, just the two of them, walking slowly side by side with the occasional outburst from the daughter. there is no way the kid will ever be a functioning, independent adult. Her mom probably knew it all the along ever since she was born / diagnosed, she was going to take care of her until she is too old to do so. She won't be able to just get up and go on a vacation.. whatever the dreams and plans she had for the kid when she was pregnant with her were completely shattered the moment she found out her daughter's condition. To many people, she is going to be a prisoner of the unfortunate circumstances and she will never have a normal life, ever. Yet her face was just... so full of love. the way she tried to calm her, how she wrapped her arms around her daughter shoulder reassuring her. she could've stayed home where her daughter is more manageable, she couldve stayed home to make her own day easier. but she got up and went on that little walk with her every day. it changed my perspective.. im not gonna lie and say it suddenly made me wake up from the depressive state that i was in, but i often go back to that picture and re-evaluate what's important. and it has helped me as i gradually grew up in my early to mid 20's

This isn't a sob story to have people feel better about themselves by knowing someone out there has it worse. I hate this kind of contest on who's gotten the worse end of the stick. honestly, everything is subjective. the importance and the value of anything is subjective. even the biggest, most important aspect of life: happiness, is subjective. there are many important decisions we make in life, but the most important thing is to decide to be happy.

sorry if it's getting off topic.. your post above just reminded me of this story :p you went on a vacation and you noticed how precious and limited each happy moments can be. maybe we are all given a fixed amount of those moments, and some of us are pissing them away by feeling sorry for our lack of success with girls.. drowning in something that is also subjective, misery.
 

Panda89

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There's nothing wrong with going off topic now and then, happens all the time. Bro, posts like yours are music to my ears. It's the way I'm often thinking. Everyone uses the forum in different ways. For some it's about venting or time pass with humour. For me, it's mostly been about being informative regarding hair/aesthetics and contemplating life goals, seeing how we all interpret that.

What Norwood are you? You're on finasteride and presumably have enough native hair left to protect...with surgery you could be set. It sounds like a really tough time when you describe your soul being drained by a change in appearance and tough job. I can see why you resorted to drink and weed and glad you're passed that. Sometimes it can help in the short term with anxiety but long term it's no solution with other consequences as you know yourself I'm sure. I think in that moment you felt like life was a play and you were simply a figure in it nothing more. Deep anxiety/depression can do that to you. Congrats on getting out of that hole though with renewed purpose, appreciation and perspective. Not everyone has the insight or courage to make it out. Now the moments when you feel down, you'll never fall that much again.

The example you gave shows the love of a mum. I was having this discussion recently about having a healthy child or terminating in pregnancy if possible, there really are no easy answers and sometimes being cruel to be kind is true. But having that child and telling them you kept them because you wanted them to see and feel the world, is an indescribable special feeling too. In your example, we don't know whether the pregnancy was abnormal and detected as such. Either way, the mum's love is not in doubt. Like you wrote, she could have just stayed at home but did everything with sincerity and care. Nature is also healing no matter what someone is going through at any age.

Good maturity from you! Happiness is the goal and that's subjective, well put mate. You can have nothing and be happy, have everything and be unhappy. We can see many examples of this. So to a certain extent, our reaction is under our control aside from genetic mental illness. I think having an open mind helps a lot. If you can't get what you want from life, change what you want. It's not a cope because if you truly move on and accept the circumstances and put energy into something else with success...that's amazing.

Hope you be the best version of yourself in looks, personality, achievements and passions. Most importantly, don't beat yourself up for something out of your control, instead reward yourself somehow with something.
thanks for the encouraging words Wolf! I've always enjoyed your take on things when you chimed in on some of the more gloomy posts in the impact forum (i've been binge reading past posts and i'm now at page 95 lol) I came here to learn more about hair loss treatments after avoiding the topic for a long time. didn't expect to find a lot of people who are also going through severe confidence issues.. people who are clearly depressed and need somewhere to vent.

i like your "being in a play" analogy. yes, it felt like i was just watching everything happen.. there was no emotion involved and i did not care what happen to the person that was me. i'm fine with those 5/6 years i wasted in misery though, like you said, i will NEVER allow myself to fall that much again.

i'm norwood 3 vertex with pretty diffused top in a nw5 pattern (visible, see through top). fortunately and unfortunately i'm Asian. Unfortunate because not a single one of my Asian friends have hair loss problem at my age, but fortunately being asian made me a decent responder to finasteride. Im actively tackling this issue instead of avoiding it and thats good enough for me now! and yes, i plan to have surgery after my treatment with finasteride stabilizes in a year or so.

thanks, you too man! Funny thing is the younger more cynical me would've never thought i would be so into positivity and self encouragement :p
 

Cue Bald

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well in regards to my story about the young couple separating, he was her first and only boyfriend and she didn't want to spend her entire life with someone who she didn't find attractive, so she obviously didn't find bald men attractive at all. that much is obvious to me.

i mean she didn't come out and say it was about baldness, she never said she hated bald men and who knows what those two discussed in private so it could have been about anything, but really occams razor and all stating that the simplest explanation is likely to be correct - i am 99% sure him going bald and her freaking out about being stuck with a man she was no longer attracted to at a very young age, was the cause of it. she didn't want to spend the rest of her life feeling old being with a bald man (it looked terrible on him, made him look like her dad)

perhaps she also resented how he just ignored it and changed the subject (i was ignorant about treatments back then, everyone is ignorant about male pattern baldness until it happens to them, some research it as soon as they hit NW1.5, others bury their heads in the sand which is what he did)
imagine if you were with a girl and she ballooned in weight, 20lbs a month and when you talk to her about going on a diet or not eating those 3 burgers she just ignores you and changes the subject. how much of that could you take?

do you remember dudemon from on here? the exact same thing happened to him, his wife married him because they were both metalheads, he had his long metal hair. well when male pattern baldness kicked in she was absolutely brutal towards him. made fun of him to his face and called him bald and ugly. as a last resort he got a hair transplant, but got butchered so she divorced him. i have no reason to see why he would have made all of it up on a hair loss board, if he made it up well he should go to hollywood and become a script writer (writing horror movies)

i wish i hadn't ignored it until i was norwood 3 / 3.5. i wish i had just gotten on finasteride as soon as i noticed it as i think i would have maintained a thick NW2 or even a NW1.5 as finasteride works well on me. i was still in the denial phase until one day i saw just how bad it really looked, and then everything "clicked" as i realised people had been treating me drastically different and this was why
 

jasonstatham

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But in fact matters of affection are completely separated from rationality.
The girl might have ditched the husband even if he had been Norwood-1.

What really makes the difference in my experience is the competition they feel from other women.

If a woman thinks other women would want to f**k you, that you are some sort of prize, you are more likely to keep your relationship.

If they feel they are not competing, you might be left in the cold sooner or later.

The most important thing to keep a relationship is to be able or at least make her think, you could have other girls too. Women love and hate to be jealous. It's so important to stay in shape in a relationship. That's why I never understood why you can be "bald and fat" when you have kids and stuff. Why would a woman suddenly not care about having a nice looking husband just because she has kids?
 

alekgn

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Far more complex than "cat face."
068edc13ab628665f7bb01c1c330fe1c.jpg


The golden ratio is a better answer. The above are outlines of ideal male and female faces according to it.
 
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