How do you guys deal with this ****

[AScannerDarkly]

I think the #1 thing I wanted in life was good hair. And I never had it. I always had longer hairstyles but my hair was very fine, and after washing it if I didnt style it would look like a birds nest on my head. Had good facial features that I've always been complemented on but a very high forehead which was part of the reason I wore my hair long. Pretty much not long after I hit puberty my hair began to thin out in a diffuse pattern. By 16 it became very noticeable that my hair was really thin and even though I had it long and had pretty bad anxiety since I was young I would easily pull girls with my looks, became outgoing and had fun in life. Looking back I wish I had made more out of it because I was always self conscious and shy and missed a lot of opportunities. I was in denial about hair loss for a while, thinking I got blessed with my mothers nice hair, and then when it thinned out a bit I figured it would stop because my dad (who is the only person in my family besides his mom who had hair loss) had thin hair when he was young but maintained it for a good 20-30 years and even 40 years later still isn't bald but just very diffuse all over. By the time I graduated and finished my first year in university I was constantly wearing hats, and managed to look good even though my long hair underneath was really thinned out. I always knew how bad it looked underneath though so I cut it short when I was 19 or so and sported shorter hairstyles or just buzzed it off. When I styled my hair into a faux hawk with lots of hairspray it concealed the extent of my hair thinning but I never liked how I looked bald/with short hair. Didnt go with my self image and my temples had recessed a bit too (never had a pefectly straight hairline to begin with..) so I became less outgoing, lost the confidence I gained in my last years at highschool, avoided people/situations etc. Began smoking lots of pot daily and sitting at home being on the computer, didnt bother going out trying to get girls, stopped caring/going to university and dropped out in my second year. I did brief stints with finasteride and I'm currently taking it now (EOD to reduce sides) but realistically I will never expect to get the hair I want from it.
I always struggled with depression because of my anxiety and other reasons since I was 12 or so but it's gotten worse and worse as I grew older. I worked for a year and made enough money to pay for my way back into university with enough left over, and was doing alright because I was avoiding my problems being constantly high, felt more financially secure and didnt give a damn about feeling self conscious at work. I knew it wouldn't last tho and now that I'm back in school I'm basically at a crisis point. Just turned 21 this summer, have diffused thin hair in a nw5 pattern and feeling like **** being back in school seeing 95% of people with better hair than me, and people who are ahead of me in life because I havent made any progress in the last 2 years in my education. In the last several months my hair definately took a hit and scared me back on meds, my scalp is pretty visible through my thin fine hair. I really thought during a stage in my life, when I was 16-17, that despite all my problems as a teenager that things were looking up and I was gonna turn out fine, but this hairloss has pretty much completely ruined my life. The only option I have left is to get a hair system and hold out til I get it by concealers/hats or just **** it and kill myself like I probably should've years ago. Im not completely secure with the idea of wearing hair that's not mine (even if my own is crap) and think the maintenance will be an absolute pain in the *** but I don't want to be sporting a buzzcut/thinning look for the rest of my life.
All you people who have slightly receding hairlines/maintain their hair until at least their 30s don't know how lucky you've had it. This hairloss has impacted me on every area in my life and I do not want to stick around through my 20s just holding on and not looking the way I want and not being able to have the life I wanted. I don't think I deserved this at all i've tried to be a great person to people and have wonderful friends and a loving family but they cant understand the suffering I'm going through and knowing it will only get worse and I'm finding it hard to maintain even an outward persona of positivity now. I know lots of people have worse problems but this feels like the worst thing that can happen to a shy insecure young teenager, like I've been afflicted by a terminal illness or something. Seriously considering if I can handle wearing hair for the rest of my life or should just start writing a note explaining to people why I won't be able to make it to my 22nd birthday

Sorry for the depressing rant I'm not looking for any sympathy or anything just really needed to get this off my chest. To all the people who lost their hair early and rock the shaved look I respect that since I would never envision living the rest of my life this way especially this young. Peace.

 

[Exodus2011]

wow man me and you have real similar situations, we are pretty much the same really

except i was 17 when my hair diffused a lot

really to deal with it, i use meds and hope for the best, and distract myself. yea thats it, those are my two main therapies lol. i also come here to vent.

first of all, are you on rogaine? u said u were on finasteride, id get on both and wait around a year before considering hair systems and such

and yea, u said it, its very difficult to deal with this at this age, just hold on though. its unlikely but its possible that a cure cud come out soon if that makes u feel any better.

if u wanna talk just private message me

 

[AScannerDarkly]

I'm finding it hard enough to take finasteride pills cause they **** with your hormones, I don't think I'd be able to do 1-2 rogaine applications per day every day for the rest of my life, especially at this stage when my hair is so diffusely thin it wouldn't bring me back to what I want and I'd be seriously stressed out over sheds and taking it forever unless I want all my hair to rapidly fall out. The maintenance to do that would basically be approaching the level of a hair system without giving the appearance I desire. The only other things besides finasteride I take are zinc/vitamin supplements and nizoral 2% shampoo (now once a week). I figure I can continue that regimen while wearing but I'm still trying to find a way of coping with wearing since I know it won't be real and I'd have to worry about people finding out/it not blending right or if the bond happens to loosen etc. On the other hand it would look infinitely better than anything medication or a transplant would achieve for me and I never liked my hair to begin with so I wouldnt have a problem, just the way others might perceive it. There's a lot of situations I avoid and stuff I don't do because of my hair anyways so it wouldnt be a big difference in that department, although I've heard with the proper bond guys do crazy things with theirs on such as water skiing, swimming, workout 5 days a week etc. that I would not feel comfortable doing with my own natural hair lol. Sometimes I feel good about trying it, other times I have apprehensions and reservations about it being looked down upon and made fun of by others. The truth is that they can look pretty damn undetectable these days, and with the right info and suppliers you wont have to drop thousands on a good looking piece and can spend under 1-2k a year. I just think despite the negatives its a good tradeoff in my situation since I know I can't picture myself living the rest of my life with my hair like this or worse. My hair has been diffusing slowly but over such a long time and from when I was so young its really painful watching it slowly die. I feel like I've already wasted so much time trying to wait to see if it'll stop worsening I wanna confront the problem now and either deal with it and put it behind me or know for certain that its something I can't solve & move beyond. I know for certain that I don't want to live through my 20s which should be the best years of my life being handicapped and distressed by this and suffer.

tbh when I first thought about the idea of a system I considered it as something I would at least try temporarily while staying on the meds so if a cure does come out I can make the transition cause i at least took preventative measures for my own hair during that time. Looking around I'm not as optimistic anymore since a "cure" could have possibly come out in the next few years for many, many years now. I'm not about to watch my life go by waiting for it to supposedly arrive.

 

[Exodus2011]

look, don't believe the fear mongering about propecia. only 2% get sides and it doesnt **** with ur hormones. i delayed on it for like a year unfortunately cuz of the fear mongering. now im taking it and im getting no sides whatsoever. besides, u can get on half the normal dose, which is somethign like 80 to 90% as effective as the normal dose if u are worried about sides that much.

also rogaine foam is really easy to use. about 2 minutes to apply it, and it dries in about 5 to 10 minutes. i pop a pill every other day and spend about 3 or 4 minutes total a day doing rogaine foam 2x a day. its extremely easy. i dont see how someone cudnt do it.

as for the sheds, thats just hair you would have lost anyways and a sign that the med is kicking in, altho not all get it. its impossible to make your hair worse, why the hell wud it? its hair loss MEDICATIONS that was made to TREAT hair loss.

im just saying, do both for at least a year and see where you are at, diffuse thinners are generally more successful with meds than receders.

and about cures, like i said its unlikely but its possible

 

[antman]

How do you guys deal with this ****

making a list of things i regret not doing and than making a plan of how to make them happen then doing it. sometimes i fail and other times i am successful but the good thing about success is that you only need to do it once and after that it becomes easier. and even if u r successful, you'll still feel like turd most time but just not as bad as before. i guess i live in hope that things will continue to improve as they have so far me since making that list.

 

[meetjoeblack]

Look for role models. Look for successful bald or balding men and use it as a point of reference. If it can be done, you can do it. Seal, statham, zidane, and others own it. I watch that show community. Joel mchale leads and jokes are made of his high forehead or receeding hair line. He continues to laugh it of and brag about his appearance. He owns it well. He plays the dick head quite nicely. Every aspect of who you are to your core you must own it. Love yourself as gay and lame as it sounds,

I deal with anxiety, bad skin, receeding hair, and since accutane, hairloss. I am hopefull it will pass and regrow. I pray and have faith. I read self help, I watch tony robbins break through on youtube (check it out for motivation)
And I practice cold approach. I lost family and I get ****ed up at times. I just develop mental toughness.

Eventually, we'll meet the right girl. Don't kid yourself. Aging, hairloss, death etc sucks. We'll never be truly okay with it but we can accept it or accept we dislike it. No point freaking out or being a awkward weirdo. Too many of those online bitching like sissies about it. If it worses, I'll buzz it like chris evans captain america or get a liine up and fade. It will go along with my bad *** persona.

 

[AScannerDarkly]

It's not really that I'm losing my hair thats the problem but the fact that it came at a time for me when I was really young, becoming more social breaking out of my shyness and overcoming my problems and starting to figure out my way around girls a lot better. I've buzzed my hair before and wear it short and I absolutely hate it, some people say it looks good on me but that's cause when I do grow it out a bit I go through a lot of trouble to style it properly to conceal my thinning. Having very short hair/no hair does not conform to my self image at all, doesn't complement my head shape or facial features at all and makes me look a lot older and a totally different person. I know I wont be able to regrow my long hair from meds b/c its so thin and would be lucky just to maintain it but for what ? I cant accept this look especially knowing I'll be living with it for the rest of my life. Like it or not your appearance is a strong component of where you'll get in life and how people treat you. I've always been very empathetic to others and sensitive to the way I'm being treated or judged which I'm thankful for because it really helps with forming close relationships with people but makes my concern about my appearance so much worse. I wasn't happy with life before anyways and now feeling like this is basically the final **** you its given me in terms of having any chance of enjoying it and living out my dreams

 

[Exodus2011]

wow man i know exactly what you mean

the body image part is very difficult to get over. in fact id say its impossible for me

HOWEVER, this may sound strange, but the thing that helps me is simply accepting that i can't accept it and trying to live in spite of it. really its all you can do, dont get me wrong though its a constant struggle, and occasionally i'll feel EXTREMELY terrible about it, but i still go on, i dont wanna commit suicide

 

[meetjoeblack]

I use to let petty stuff like acne or hair rattle me. Then I buried my sister and dad after a drunk driver. I found myself in a dark place. I question god, my faith, everything I ever believed in. I read a book called first rate madness which discusses the purpose of being in a dark place and even beyond mental health. It went on to describe those with mentally ill being ready and able to be leaders in times when the rest of the world is hiding under the bed. Maybe there is some meaning behind our personal conflicts?

Like an echo, I think many of us keep repeating and cycling over again back into the darkness. We need to rise above our conflicts. The easy thing would be to curse god and feel sorry for myself. I was not raised to be a pussy. I won't disrespect my family name and blood line like that.

Find meaning in life. Give it purpose and reason. Something to shoot for.












.

 

[macimate]

Look for role models. Look for successful bald or balding men and use it as a point of reference. If it can be done, you can do it. Seal, statham, zidane, and others own it. I watch that show community. Joel mchale leads and jokes are made of his high forehead or receeding hair line. He continues to laugh it of and brag about his appearance. He owns it well. He plays the dick head quite nicely. Every aspect of who you are to your core you must own it. Love yourself as gay and lame as it sounds,

I deal with anxiety, bad skin, receeding hair, and since accutane, hairloss. I am hopefull it will pass and regrow. I pray and have faith. I read self help, I watch tony robbins break through on youtube (check it out for motivation)
And I practice cold approach. I lost family and I get ****ed up at times. I just develop mental toughness.

Eventually, we'll meet the right girl. Don't kid yourself. Aging, hairloss, death etc sucks. We'll never be truly okay with it but we can accept it or accept we dislike it. No point freaking out or being a awkward weirdo. Too many of those online bitching like sissies about it. If it worses, I'll buzz it like chris evans captain america or get a liine up and fade. It will go along with my bad *** persona.

Delusional. That's what you are. This is pushing me over the edge. The stupidity of some of you ****ing idiots.
Good job using famous people as role models. Your life or status is nowhere near theirs. It can't apply to you. If you're bald and don't have the facial aesthetics of Freddie Ljungberg, say GOODBYE to getting attention from legit hot women. Period.

 

[Beingbaldsucksass]

Delusional. That's what you are. This is pushing me over the edge. The stupidity of some of you ****ing idiots.
Good job using famous people as role models. Your life or status is nowhere near theirs. It can't apply to you. If you're bald and don't have the facial aesthetics of Freddie Ljungberg, say GOODBYE to getting attention from legit women(unless they are fat whales)Period.

Fixed

 

[HairGuru22]

Firstly, I feel your pain, each of one us on this forum is going trough what you have mentioned. Secondly, since you are contemplating suicide, you might as well get on finasteride.

 

[Jockson]

Delusional. That's what you are. This is pushing me over the edge. The stupidity of some of you ****ing idiots.
Good job using famous people as role models. Your life or status is nowhere near theirs. It can't apply to you. If you're bald and don't have the facial aesthetics of Freddie Ljungberg, say GOODBYE to getting attention from legit hot women. Period.

Not everyone's life revolves around getting attention from "legit hot women". Unless you look like a model you won't be pulling model looking women? No ****ing **** genius.

 

[AScannerDarkly]

Firstly, I feel your pain, each of one us on this forum is going trough what you have mentioned. Secondly, since you are contemplating suicide, you might as well get on finasteride.

I am currently taking finasteride. What scares me even more is that my dad who is 62 has diffused thinning all over his head, including the back and side area. So basically he has DUPA. His mom, my paternal grandmother also had diffuse thin hair all over her head. I don't notice my sides or back hair thinning out yet (my sides might appear a bit thin but theyre short right now and i have fine hair so i cant tell if im overreacting :S) but seems like its hereditary so i am ****ed.

 

[Night]

I think i have DUPA. But I might be overreacting.

 

[Beingbaldsucksass]

I think i have DUPA. But I might be overreacting.

What is DUPA?

- - - Updated - - -

Not everyone's life revolves around getting attention from "legit hot women". Unless you look like a model you won't be pulling model looking women? No ****ing **** genius.

Beside fat woman no woman will look at you

 

[DannyBoyy]

You are such a vain person beingbaldsucksass do you expect everyone to be some skinny twig or something? get your head out your arse.

 

[Jockson]

Beside fat woman no woman will look at you

With a stinky attitude like that, I doubt even those horrible, ugly, fat women will tbh.

 

[Exodus2011]

You are such a vain person beingbaldsucksass do you expect everyone to be some skinny twig or something? get your head out your arse.

i hope you arent insulting skinny people here

its not my fault im skinny and theres loads of girls who are naturally skinny. again, its just their natural metabolism. i hate people who think that everyone skinny starves themselves.

 

[DannyBoyy]

i hope you arent insulting skinny people here

its not my fault im skinny and theres loads of girls who are naturally skinny. again, its just their natural metabolism. i hate people who think that everyone skinny starves themselves.

No im just saying he is judging fat people saying no one wants to be with them so i was like ok do you expect everyone to be skinny twigs? (you know opposite to fat? and i said twig cause you know they are skinny?) and thats why i said EXPECT does he expect everyone to be skinny an not fat.