Hairloss Reminds Me My Youth Is Over

[JohnsonDDG]

Youre only as old as you feel?

Wrong

You are as old as your hairline

You're only as young as the woman you feel.

 

[Chromedome1990]

My summer of 2009 was so full of hope, I spent the holidays in France with my new friends from university and you had that careless youth feeling, just drinking, fooling around, having a good time.

The funny thing is that as I was enjoying those moments, I already had my diagnosis (on June 12th 2009) but of course I was in denial, until the 4th of September (funny how I remember the dates so clearly), when one of my new (female) friends just casually said, as I was drunk on the sofa:

"Bear, you're becoming bald?!"

That was the end of my youth right there. I was 19.

I cried a little reading this...

 

[razzmatazz91]

I was depressed for months after that, it was quite a bittersweet winter, moments of deep depression mixed with some hope that everything would be alright in the end, I'd cope mostly with entertainment (movies, music) and studying for university. To make matters worse, one of my courses was all about how life was meaningless and absurd, just what I needed in such dark times.

Then minoxidil started to work quite well, and I was back to having normal hair again, then since I knew it would be short-lived, the anxiety kicked in. I spent the summer of 2010 suffering through violent panic attacks that made me want to jump of the window, a few months later, I was so psychologically exhausted that I had to go to a psychiatric clinic, on the day of my birthday (boy what a life!).

They gave me antidepressants which in the space of a few months turned me into a maniac who'd be happy all the time, going out all the time, having seemingly unlimited amounts of energy, then of course I crashed, hard. Now it was depression, anxiety and psychosis on top of it, since I had completely lost track of where I was, realizing that I had basically made a fool of myself for like 6 months.

Then I got out at the beginning of 2012, with my body being slightly damaged in various ways (and almost bald now), one of the damages was all the psychiatric medication I took gave me mild eye floaters, which were really bothering me, so I tell my psychiatrist about it. He says that they are hallucinations and that I need more antipsychotics. In the space of a month, I grow a pair of tits as a side-effect of the medication.

I'm bald, overweight, I have acne, eye floaters, boobs and to make matters worse, the doctor just tells me that I should accept all this "no one is going to notice your boobs at the beach, no surgeon will accept to remove them anyway!". That's the last straw, I start having horrifying temper tantrums and engaging in self-harm. So in the summer of 2012, I'm back in the psychiatric clinic for the third and last time.

I'm exhausted and spend my time calling up and visiting surgeons to fix my gynecomastia, while some of the staff at the clinic tells me that I should just live with it, again. One surgeon finally accepts to operate on me, I get the surgery on October 22th 2012. A month into the recovery, I see that it's a success, I also lost weight, my face cleared up, the floaters don't bother me anymore, and I meet Dr. De Reys, the surgeon who will perform my FUE who tells me that yes, he'll operate on me when I'm ready (so in May 2014).

After that, my life just got better and better, I'll get my social and dating life back, my bachelor's degree, then my master's degree, a prestigious internship that seemed to have come out of nowhere, I'll travel around the world with my friends, I'd find a great job, a lovely girlfriend, I'd join a band and perform live, etc. When I look back on what I went through and I realize where I am today, it all seems surreal to me sometimes. I can't help but being grateful all the time these days, but I also know that I have to remain awake, and to keep on being disciplined to make sure that my life remains great.

I really hope that we can help each other to achieve that kind of contentment in life, even despite the most tragic circumstances. No matter how low you sink, you have to remain hopeful and do everything in your power to stay afloat and eventually overcome the tragedy that is hair loss. The battle is never really over, that's why I'm really excited about having my second FUE hair transplant in two weeks.

Most inspiring post I've ever read on hairlosstalk.

 

[Baldingat188]

My summer of 2009 was so full of hope, I spent the holidays in France with my new friends from university and you had that careless youth feeling, just drinking, fooling around, having a good time.

The funny thing is that as I was enjoying those moments, I already had my diagnosis (on June 12th 2009) but of course I was in denial, until the 4th of September (funny how I remember the dates so clearly), when one of my new (female) friends just casually said, as I was drunk on the sofa:

"Bear, you're becoming bald?!"

That was the end of my youth right there. I was 19.

Damn.

I feel like I never got the careless youth feeling. I spent my teen years with crippling social anxiety where I could hardly talk to people. Finally at 17 when that got better I noticed my hair thinning.

Hair Thinning affects me in so many ways. It really fundamentally changed me as a person which is weird to explain to some people. I am super different then I was 2 years ago mostly because of hairloss. It's made me feel the need to give off a rougher vibe and I even started using a different name a few years ago. People probly read this and think I'm joking but my birth name is a childish sounding name that given the state of my hair doesn't suit me. I feel so much older and I even act like an old man. I don't drink , party , stay up late.

I would love to know what it feels like

 

[Saulus]

Damn.

I feel like I never got the careless youth feeling. I spent my teen years with crippling social anxiety where I could hardly talk to people. Finally at 17 when that got better I noticed my hair thinning.

Hair Thinning affects me in so many ways. It really fundamentally changed me as a person which is weird to explain to some people. I am super different then I was 2 years ago mostly because of hairloss. It's made me feel the need to give off a rougher vibe and I even started using a different name a few years ago. People probly read this and think I'm joking but my birth name is a childish sounding name that given the state of my hair doesn't suit me. I feel so much older and I even act like an old man. I don't drink , party , stay up late.

I would love to know what it feels like

Brutal just fuckin brutal

 

[Funkymonk1]

Youre only as old as you feel?

Wrong

You are as old as your hairline

That's basically what I was trying to say.

 

[Chromedome1990]

I was depressed for months after that, it was quite a bittersweet winter, moments of deep depression mixed with some hope that everything would be alright in the end, I'd cope mostly with entertainment (movies, music) and studying for university. To make matters worse, one of my courses was all about how life was meaningless and absurd, just what I needed in such dark times.

Then minoxidil started to work quite well, and I was back to having normal hair again, then since I knew it would be short-lived, the anxiety kicked in. I spent the summer of 2010 suffering through violent panic attacks that made me want to jump of the window, a few months later, I was so psychologically exhausted that I had to go to a psychiatric clinic, on the day of my birthday (boy what a life!).

They gave me antidepressants which in the space of a few months turned me into a maniac who'd be happy all the time, going out all the time, having seemingly unlimited amounts of energy, then of course I crashed, hard. Now it was depression, anxiety and psychosis on top of it, since I had completely lost track of where I was, realizing that I had basically made a fool of myself for like 6 months.

Then I got out at the beginning of 2012, with my body being slightly damaged in various ways (and almost bald now), one of the damages was all the psychiatric medication I took gave me mild eye floaters, which were really bothering me, so I tell my psychiatrist about it. He says that they are hallucinations and that I need more antipsychotics. In the space of a month, I grow a pair of tits as a side-effect of the medication.

I'm bald, overweight, I have acne, eye floaters, boobs and to make matters worse, the doctor just tells me that I should accept all this "no one is going to notice your boobs at the beach, no surgeon will accept to remove them anyway!". That's the last straw, I start having horrifying temper tantrums and engaging in self-harm. So in the summer of 2012, I'm back in the psychiatric clinic for the third and last time.

I'm exhausted and spend my time calling up and visiting surgeons to fix my gynecomastia, while some of the staff at the clinic tells me that I should just live with it, again. One surgeon finally accepts to operate on me, I get the surgery on October 22th 2012. A month into the recovery, I see that it's a success, I also lost weight, my face cleared up, the floaters don't bother me anymore, and I meet Dr. De Reys, the surgeon who will perform my FUE who tells me that yes, he'll operate on me when I'm ready (so in May 2014).

After that, my life just got better and better, I'll get my social and dating life back, my bachelor's degree, then my master's degree, a prestigious internship that seemed to have come out of nowhere, I'll travel around the world with my friends, I'd find a great job, a lovely girlfriend, I'd join a band and perform live, etc. When I look back on what I went through and I realize where I am today, it all seems surreal to me sometimes. I can't help but being grateful all the time these days, but I also know that I have to remain awake, and to keep on being disciplined to make sure that my life remains great.

I really hope that we can help each other to achieve that kind of contentment in life, even despite the most tragic circumstances. No matter how low you sink, you have to remain hopeful and do everything in your power to stay afloat and eventually overcome the tragedy that is hair loss. The battle is never really over, that's why I'm really excited about having my second FUE hair transplant in two weeks.

Good post man, even though the only thing I can really relate to is our age (I'm also 27). The thing for me is, it never got better. Overall my life has been on a downward trend since it dawned on me I was balding back in 2007. Slowly over time I've come to accept that I'll never have my old Norwood 0 again, but at the same time it's absolutely soul crushing why I had to start experiencing this ordeal in high school. Without Toppik I probably would have become a NEET shut in. Too chicken to off myself.

 

[sisenegonan]

I agree with some of the posters here. Most of us basically haven't even had a youth.

To make matters worse, my interests since childhood were mostly hobbies where I could be alone (yeah gaming). So at 14, its the final grade of high school suddenly folks tell me that I am balding. I goto a doctor and like roberto said, apparently I had 'aggressive' androgenetic alopecia. The first doctor outright refused to help me. The second tried to make sense, saying they can only delay the inevitable but I can still have some fun in life. But for something so 'aggressive' measly 1mg of finasteride would never suffice. Since I was 15, they basically didn't want to give me any strong stuff.

But now I regret it all. Been made fun of in the final years of high school, my intermediate, my college years, and even my work life. If I could tell my younger self to hop on spironolactone I could probably save all the hair. Hell my father in between even offered a hair transplant (he was drunk). Now that I think of it I should have begged like anything. Probably even got on a wig for my work life. Living like this there is no meaning, moreover its not required.

To make matters worse, my father cares more about what happens to my face, than my hair. In between when I got hit by hyper-reflexive-androgenecity, he told me to goto a doctor and take marks removing cream (had a hell lot of pimple spots). I'm like WTF??? there are more glaring issues with me, than just a few measly spots.