Anyone else think reincarnation is the only answer?

[Boondock]

Not a solid certain solution, but let's assume there's a 10% chance of reincarnation happening.

I've basically been genetically screwed by this life, and there isn't that much that can be done about it. Being skinny and short and somewhat feminine-faced isn't too bad if you have hair, but take that away and *boom*...you're ET.

I'm thinking that this could be basically the only answer for me. This life is pretty much not going to work out and statistically I'm very likely to get a better roll of the dice next time round...if there is a next time round.

Not really suicidal but just thinking of giving up on this life because the fight to actually succeed with all this crap going on is slowly destroying me. It's like an amputee trying to play world cup soccer against Brazil. No matter what adjustments you try to make, these people are just genetically far superior to you.

 

[cuebald]

I'm trying to find out now where the parodying is stopping and where the reality is starting. :mrgreen:

As far as myself is concerned:

Being skinny - check
and short - check
and somewhat feminine-faced - check

When I had hair there were women who went for this look (perhaps they never had any little brothers :mrgreen
But without hair you're turned into something bizarre.. someone who looks like they should have hair, and when it is absent, it's jarring. Like a 7 year old going completely, slick sly.

 

[Boondock]

^ This is EXACTLY my problem man.

 

[Boondock]

I've also toyed with the idea of becoming a monk.

I'm not into the whole religion thing that much, but at least joining a monastery guarantees you some level of friendship and social interaction into old age, a secure job, and often a pretty decent location to live in.

In the small chance that there is a heaven and hell, you'd be pretty well set up. You could see your Norwood 1 ex-friends in purgatory, and say "look who's laughing now, buddy."

Obviously the bald look totally gels with the monk persona as well. Even the NW1s end up rocking the sly look in the monastery.

It just seems like a decent long-term solution.

 

[Mens Rea]

im short (5 7) and diffuse but one life saver is im masculine looking - im hairy and i have good stubble

thats the only positive i have - guys losing their hair when they have baby face and no stubble etc can hurt their look even more.

however - the skinny thing? you can work on that!

 

[Boondock]

im short (5 7) and diffuse but one life saver is im masculine looking - im hairy and i have good stubble

thats the only positive i have - guys losing their hair when they have baby face and no stubble etc can hurt their look even more.

however - the skinny thing? you can work on that!

Not to any large extent. I have a very slim, skinny frame and bone structure. I can (and have) toned this up, but there's no possibility of getting jacked.

 

[Mens Rea]

im short (5 7) and diffuse but one life saver is im masculine looking - im hairy and i have good stubble

thats the only positive i have - guys losing their hair when they have baby face and no stubble etc can hurt their look even more.

however - the skinny thing? you can work on that!

Not to any large extent. I have a very slim, skinny frame and bone structure. I can (and have) toned this up, but there's no possibility of getting jacked.

Obviously everyone has different things to work with but i bet you could obtain a build you would be vey happy with if you did it right.

My brother is naturally very skinny too and has built himself up gradually into a good size. It fluctuates and may require maintainance but you'd surprise yourself!

 

[Ori83]

My brother is naturally very skinny too and has built himself up gradually into a good size. It fluctuates and may require maintainance but you'd surprise yourself!

Yes, this is very true, right now im 68Kilos because i run alot, and im very skinny, people tell me all the time (i dont really care because probably im 10 times healthier then they ever was) but i used to be 75 Kilo and was a completely different person, and btw, girls love biffed guys, and less attracted to the skinny ones, so you can work out, eat more and change your skinny looks, and if you stay on high carb diet with some fat youll gain more fat in around your face which can really change your looks! (healthy and more vital face).

Not really suicidal but just thinking of giving up on this life because the fight to actually succeed with all this crap going on is slowly destroying me.

We all have these thoughts, the questions you need to answer are
A) how do YOU define success ? you might surprise yourself here, for example, having a good career has absolutely nothing to do with hair-loss... same goes leading a healthy life-style (eating properly, working out, etc)
B) what actions your gonna take to change it? if at all...

 

[Boondock]

We all have these thoughts, the questions you need to answer are
A) how do YOU define success ? you might surprise yourself here, for example, having a good career has absolutely nothing to do with hair-loss... same goes leading a healthy life-style (eating properly, working out, etc)
B) what actions your gonna take to change it? if at all...

It might be a strange attitude, but my aims for success are separate to what makes me happy.

I have a particular set of goals I want to achieve in life, and every time I get closer to those I get some sense of satisfaction. I can achieve that 'success', and it will be worth something. But by itself, it will just be a case of me climbing a ladder and finding there's nothing at the top of it. It doesn't really make me happy.

I need happiness too, and that's what hair loss is snuffing out from me. It's hard to be happy when if you go out to a social occasion, strangers won't even give you the time of day. Pre-hair loss, I wasn't 'rocking the club' but I could have a number of decent interactions and have a good night. Nowadays, it's just crushing, and my odds of getting girls have gone from OK to complete zero, and my odds of having fun have gone way down also.

I don't see much point in career success if it's achieved while being lonely and not having any enjoyment in life. You need both. If anything you can do without the career if you've got the rest.

 

[Boondock]

Man, I seriously need to get me a hair system. I think I will get it sorted when I get back from travelling this summer.

I'm *just* about at a level where I can get away with the transition still, and I don't see any other option left for me. The rate I am going I'm pretty much setting myself up to be the next UCMan. (Again, no offence UMan but you know as well as I do the rut you're in with hair loss, and the lack of solutions you have.)

This sh*t's just killing me and I need a way out.

 

[Ori83]

It might be a strange attitude, but my aims for success are separate to what makes me happy.

ok, then you might want to change your list, i think your top priority should be "Being happy" followed by "what makes you happy"

and if the answer is "hair" then do whatever you can to get that! try a piece, save money for hair transplant - if you are a good candidate that is (and goals like "having a girlfriend " =\= "having hair!!!", its a completely different set of action you make for each one!))

 

[Boondock]

It might be a strange attitude, but my aims for success are separate to what makes me happy.

ok, then you might want to change your list, i think your top priority should be "Being happy" followed by "what makes you happy"

and if the answer is "hair" then do whatever you can to get that! try a piece, save money for hair transplant - if you are a good candidate that is (and goals like "having a girlfriend " =\= "having hair!!!", its a completely different set of action you make for each one!))

I think I need both really man. I guess I have a fixed set of long-term goals, but also a basic goal to be happy along most of the path to get to them. I don't want to croak it in 50 years and look back thinking I had a miserable time.

I agree I basically need to sort my head out on the inside as well as the outside. I've become a bit of a mess over the last few months and it's getting beyond a joke.

 

[bigentries]

In the small chance that there is a heaven and hell, you'd be pretty well set up. You could see your Norwood 1 ex-friends in purgatory, and say "look who's laughing now, buddy."

Pathetic
Talks the guy that says that he can't get hotties anymore.
But lookism is wrong, hypocrites

 

[Boondock]

In the small chance that there is a heaven and hell, you'd be pretty well set up. You could see your Norwood 1 ex-friends in purgatory, and say "look who's laughing now, buddy."

Pathetic
Talks the guy that says that he can't get hotties anymore.
But lookism is wrong, hypocrites

Dude, that stuff was all a bit of a joke. I'm not seriously thinking about joining a monastery (yet, anyway).

I think my problem on this forum is the cultural differences between UK and US. I'm British and our culture has an undercurrent of irony which doesn't really make much sense, but which we assume other cultures share (and they don't).

The truth is that all the monastery stuff is nonsense, but the fact that I'm coming out with it is an indication of how dodgy my mental state is right now.

 

[Nene]

Not a solid certain solution, but let's assume there's a 10% chance of reincarnation happening.

I've basically been genetically screwed by this life, and there isn't that much that can be done about it. Being skinny and short and somewhat feminine-faced isn't too bad if you have hair, but take that away and *boom*...you're ET.

I'm thinking that this could be basically the only answer for me. This life is pretty much not going to work out and statistically I'm very likely to get a better roll of the dice next time round...if there is a next time round.

Not really suicidal but just thinking of giving up on this life because the fight to actually succeed with all this crap going on is slowly destroying me. It's like an amputee trying to play world cup soccer against Brazil. No matter what adjustments you try to make, these people are just genetically far superior to you.

Boondock, a couple of things. First of all, I saw your pics and I don't think you have a feminine face and I also don't think your hair loss is THAT severe. But you don't seem to be doing that much to fight it. I'm not too familiar with your story but you say you couldn't tolerate finasteride. Are you sure that you can't tolerate finasteride? Not even a low dose? You said min didn't work for you, how long did you try? What about nizoral or topical spironolactone? How is proxn working for you?

In any event, you still have a pretty good deal of hair and should be able to fool people into thinking you have a full head of hair with some concealers. But brother, hair or not, I have to say you are one of my favorite posters. I can tell you're very smart and you're witty as well. You have to try to find a way to cope with this, if meds aren't for you then by all means get the piece. Also, I don't think you gave the buzzed look enough of a chance. Try it for 4 or 5 months, it takes time to grow on you. I did it for over a year, I can grow a head of hair that most guys on here would kill for but I'm still comfortable buzzing down with no guard because I'm used to it and actually kinda like it. Find a way to cope with this. You have other things going for you and need to realize and appreciate that. If you can't find a way to cope with it, maybe you should try talking to a psychologist. It's not for everyone but it might help, you never know.

I'm currently converting to Buddhism and so your joke(?) about becoming a monk actually resonates with me. When I first started shaving my head I would dream of joining Shaolin temple where I would work out all day, learn to live a spiritual, humble life and everyone is bald anyway. Obviously I wouldn't actually do it but there is something romantic and comforting about the idea. Also, if you think this shitty life buys you a better life next time, think again. You could end up a roach for your next ten lives, than being a bald guy wouldn't seem so bad. lol. BTW are you fluent in Chinese? I'm trying to learn, I wish I would've studied it in college.

 

[bigentries]

In the small chance that there is a heaven and hell, you'd be pretty well set up. You could see your Norwood 1 ex-friends in purgatory, and say "look who's laughing now, buddy."

Pathetic
Talks the guy that says that he can't get hotties anymore.
But lookism is wrong, hypocrites

Dude, that stuff was all a bit of a joke. I'm not seriously thinking about joining a monastery (yet, anyway).

I think my problem on this forum is the cultural differences between UK and US. I'm British and our culture has an undercurrent of irony which doesn't really make much sense, but which we assume other cultures share (and they don't).

The truth is that all the monastery stuff is nonsense, but the fact that I'm coming out with it is an indication of how dodgy my mental state is right now.

Playing with sarcasm here is difficult.
I know you said you are on parody mode, but I take everything you an qball says as completely serious.

Call me stupid, but you have a guy that's been here for a year preaching about hairloss and how it affects him, how girls don't look at him anymore, and suddenly he posts pictures of a perfectly healthy hairline.

So an NW3 talking about becoming a monk or an NW6 that claims he can't walk without being attacked by strangers seems perfectly normal to me.

 

[Boondock]

Nene, I do appreciate this message forum bromance we have going on here.

Seriously though, finasteride was a bit of a b**ch for me. The basic story was that I gave it two trials. First time, just a week. Second time, a couple of months. I lowered the dose and all the rest of it, but the sides hit me pretty hard. Sometimes I tell myself it's worth another go, but other times I realize that the same will probably happen again. I actually tried pretty hard to outman the finasteride but there's only so long you can hold on and wait for sides to go away.

Bear in mind this was over a year ago. This was before I ended up being whiner-in-chief and was still pretty badass with my approach to hair loss. Nowadays I am sort of the mini-me to UCMan's Dr Evil. Back then, I was Austin Powers. (Really, check my post archive.)

I was on min for 18 months. No problems with sides, but I got no benefit from it either. White flakes were pretty annoying and led to wig-like monitoring and bathroom mirror eyeballing.

I am on fluridil and prox-n at the moment, but their effect is really not that significant. They seemed to be working for a while and I had zero shed for a few weeks, but I think at best they're just slowing down the process now. I am still shedding atm.

I wouldn't say I'm fluent in Chinese but I speak more than enough to get by. To a Chinese person I probably sound as fluent as a Mexican janitor-attendant does in Texas, but being able to get by and do pretty much everything you need to in the language is a fair milestone to have reached. It's a work in progress and takes more college study than I gave it.

I am tempted by Buddhism, funnily enough. I need to read a lot more about it before I commit myself to anything tho.

 

[Boondock]

Playing with sarcasm here is difficult.
I know you said you are on parody mode, but I take everything you an qball says as completely serious.

Call me stupid, but you have a guy that's been here for a year preaching about hairloss and how it affects him, how girls don't look at him anymore, and suddenly he posts pictures of a perfectly healthy hairline.

So an NW3 talking about becoming a monk or an NW6 that claims he can't walk without being attacked by strangers seems perfectly normal to me.

I am in parody mode way too much man, but I guess I just do it to try and make light of my situation. I don't know about qball, to be honest.

Pretty much everything I say that makes hair loss out to be some sort of great social stigma is a parody. In reality, my experience is that it leads to mild disadvantages in normal social life, and only has a serious effect in two areas. The first is romantic relationships. The second is how you feel emotionally about yourself.

Sometimes guys let the second of those things get bad, and that's what causes the first to go bad too.

 

[Nene]

I'm the opposite, when I joined the forum I was dealing with depression, much of it had to do with hair loss, but now I'm doing much better. My hair really hasn't improved much but I'm tolerating finasteride pretty well and not shedding, so I guess that gives me hope that I can keep my hair until my early to mid 30s, at which point I'm hoping I'll be married with a busy career and will be ready to join sly bald guys. LOL. But I have noticed your posts becoming more cynical as well as more frequent. As much as I like reading your posts it's not a good sign. Some of the things you've said lately sound more like UC man, epicetus, hat prisoner, and the suicidal version of hope4hair. Seriously, consider talking to someone, take advantage of free healthcare in the UK!!!!

Also, it does sound like you gave the meds a fair chance, good luck with the hair system.

 

[Boondock]

I agree man, I'm totally aware that I've got more negative about things lately. It's not good, even if I do try and parody it up occasionally.

I will get through this eventually though, one way or the other. I am determined not to become a bitter poster who's on here for years. Whether it means wigging it up or just shaving, I will move on.

The trouble for me is in the uncertainty and the constant continuing loss. If it's game over and I have to shave, I'll have to deal with it, even if it won't be pleasant for a while. It's just the hinterland of not knowing which way things will go, trying different treatments and all the rest of it that does my head in.

My ultimate ambition is to get off this board, come back in a few years time and report how everything actually worked out pretty well in my life - bald or not.

Hopefully I get the chance to do that.