Well, here is what we know WORKS:
1) Rod Stewart's semen
2) Nasal mucous from a young Uzbek boy (or Kazakh, but you have to use that 2x day)
3) Second coming of the Messiah
4) Doug Butter
5) A gene transplant from David Schwimmer
Short of that, we have the Big 3.
If you really wanted to throw the kitchen sink at the problem, here would be Gardener's "Temple Regmen Del Fuego":
1) Xandrox 15%, minoxidil 5%, each daily
2) Follow with 5% spironolactone cream
3) Follow that with a spray of your fave copper peptide juice
4) Finasteride, daily
5) T/Sal, then Nizoral and soak, every day
And every morning, you have to repeatedly scream "Houston:.. f***! f***! Holy Living f***! I am a-f*****g-firmatively losing my f*****g hair! Over! Do you read me Houston?" while showering.