Need your advice...

[Peter_mac]

I’m 28 (single), been losing hair since I was 16. Been using Propecia for 5 years, but don’t feel it’s really working.

People around me simply have no friggin clue how bad my hairloss really is. I’ve been combing my hair the same way since I was born, hence the combover I’m doing now to hide things doesn’t strike my friends as a mean to hide anything. My close friends keep telling me to switch hairstyle, to cut it shorter, to use gel, to dye it, to enjoy the fact I have hair and do crazy things with it. They simply don’t understand I can’t change it one bit without revealing the truth. I even told one of them (who is bald but shaved his head) I’m suffering hairloss, but he refused to believe, he said I just have some temples problem and it’s nothing to worry about, until I showed him by playing with my hair… then he believed.

I know exactly where I’m heading with this hairloss problem. I’ve seen the pics of my grandfather (father of my mother, who looks exactly like me in the photos of my age), and my time is limited. You can see how my hair looks today in the pic that I attached (no concealers used). I can probably keep this look for another 1-2 years, maybe more (with concealers), but I’m kind of tired of it, tired of the wind ruining it… I don’t want to shave my head because I’ll look ugly.

I thought, since people don’t see me as a bald guy (yet), maybe I can use it to my advantage, and switch to a hair system. The fact that I do have hair should make the switch much easier.

The question is can such a switch be done seamlessly ?, I have an advantage in the fact that I never used gel before on my hair, and never dyed it before, and never styled it before in any way other than how it looks now. If I change to a hair system (with low density at the front hairline), dye my hair, and use gel, people might not suspect a hair system, rather just a big change that happened from dye and gel and new hairstyle.

I don’t have much of a problem to live a life of lies and deceit, I feel like I’m living it now with this annoying combover… at least with a hair system I’ll look better. The question is, assuming I’ll go to great lengths, will I be able to fool 100% of the people, 100% of the time ?, are we there yet with the quality of the hair system to allow such feat ?

 

[beemark]

Your hair looks similar to the way mine looked when I was in my early-mid 20's, so I know exactly how you feel.. I'm 55 now and have only a narrow horseshoe of thin hair left.

Fortunately, other than people who knew me before, nobody knows that I wear hair. The truth is that, with the right hair system, you can fool 99% of the people 99% of the time. You are at an advantage because you still have a lot of bio hair left.

 

[Peter_mac]

Your hair looks similar to the way mine looked when I was in my early-mid 20's, so I know exactly how you feel.. I'm 55 now and have only a narrow horseshoe of thin hair left.

Fortunately, other than people who knew me before, nobody knows that I wear hair. The truth is that, with the right hair system, you can fool 99% of the people 99% of the time. You are at an advantage because you still have a lot of bio hair left.

Thanks for your answer, beemark.

Ok, I understand that if done correctly, most of the people will think it’s my real hair. The question is, regarding the small percentage that won’t be fooled, can they be sure it’s not my real hair, or will they only suspect of that possibility (in comparison to the other 99%, that won’t even suspect)?

Another important question, because I DO have something to lose (at least for now), is it possible to get a very good impression how natural the hair system will look on me, without shaving the top of my head (maybe I can order a hair system with a skin base that will mask the hair on the top of the head ?). The moment I shave the top of my head it’s game over for my real hair, if the hair system doesn’t look natural I’ll be at a much worse situation than I started…

Another question, as you can see from my pic, I have temples, can the hair system be designed to mimic those exact temples ?, otherwise I’m giving it away immediately…

 

[hair_tomorrow]

Peter -

at 28 you're still a young man and I'm sure you're still in the trauma stage of feeling pretty crappy about your hairloss.

I'm not trying to talk you out of anything - but I couldn't see "myself" going for a system. I think it'd just be more trouble than it's worth.

At a NW5, I'm 1/2 a Norwood away from one of those close cropped bald guy haircuts - but that's where I'm headed and that's what I'll do when the time comes.

The only positive thing I can tell you - is that if your hairloss progresses, then the older you get the less it'll bother you.

If we have to go bald - let's do it with a little grace and dignity.

Just my 2 cents.

 

[Peter_mac]

The only positive thing I can tell you - is that if your hairloss progresses, then the older you get the less it'll bother you.

If we have to go bald - let's do it with a little grace and dignity.

My hair (and yours) will come back. hair transplant works but there's a problem with not enough donor area. HM will solve it. It's just a matter of time, but I don't feel like I have time. I'm 28 and single, by the time HM will bring me my hair back I might be 38 and married. I will never experience how it is to be young, single and good looking... I hate the hair system idea, but my only other option is to surrender.

 

[hair_tomorrow]

I think your hair looks just fine. You seem to have enough to cover your head

We always tend to look at ouselves a bit more critically than the rest of the world sees us.

I haven't surrendered - still doing what I can do - but sometimes Mother Nature wins.

You'll need to do what is best is for you - but accepting your situation will go a long way in your personal happiness.

I've been married twice. Had a bald spot both times

 

[Peter_mac]

I've been married twice. Had a bald spot both times

LOL

I'll have to give this more thought...

 

[Peter_mac]

In order for you to give me the right advice, I want to show you the truth first. These are hard pics to look at (for me), but this is the real situation on my head (took my hair backward, and used strong light). Nobody who knows me (and I mean nobody!!!) has even the slightest of clues that this is the real situation. The situation is BAD !!!, If there is a prize for concealing baldness (with nothing but your real hair) I think I have a good shot at the top place.

The pic you saw at the beginning of the thread is how I looked for 28 years (more or less), it’s how people know me. I don’t want the truth to become my new look, I couldn’t live with myself, my confidence will never survive such a hit. This is not the life I want for myself at this age.

I can keep concealing, but the truth is there, and it will become harder and harder to disguise.

 

[hair_tomorrow]

If you're like me - you must hate windy days.

 

[Peter_mac]

Hair_Tomorrow,

Regarding what you said about balding with dignity, with all due respect, western society, in general, doesn’t give balding guys the same dignity as those with hair. In our society, attractiveness is more than often way too important, and for many people hair is a very important marker for attractiveness.

Why do I have to be treated like a second grade person by society (at least in some manners), just because I have hair follicles that are more sensitive to DHT ?, this is very superficial, no ?, and why is it wrong to correct it with superficial hair ?, why can’t a superficial problem be solved by a superficial solution ?

Now, don't get me wrong, you can't solve every superficial problem with every superficial solution, for example, a women can't solve a "small breast" problem by stuffing her bra with something, because the functionality is damaged, but she can do breast enlargement surgery. With hair replacement, no functionality is damaged, hence I think the solution is totally viable.

To me, the only question is whether I can make this work, whether I could really make people think it’s my real hair. The moment I do this, I don’t care about the rest.

 

[s.a.f]

Wow P_M you really do a good job at hiding that hairloss. The 1st pic looks like a different person.
Have you considered a hair transplant? Its a bit of an ordeal but if you think longterm it could save you alot of hassle.

 

[dr_jekyll]

That is one seriously excellent comb-over!! wow :woot:

 

[Peter_mac]

Thanks guys for the comb-over complements. The complements should really go to my barber, just an old-fashioned barber working in the same old barber shop that his father worked. He's been cutting my hair since I was 1 years old.

I don't really have hair, you saw the pics, but somehow I walk with a head full of hair and nobody notices how deep the scam goes, this is a miracle...

If I knew that my hairloss wouldn't become any worse, I would have kept things as they are, but since age 16 I'm on the gradual downhill slope that never ends, so at some point this comb-over is going to become pathetic, as they all eventually become.

I thought about hair transplant but don’t want the scar, and thought about FUE but I need too many grafts for it to be a viable option. The only thing that is going to save my real hair is HM, but that is some 5-10 years from us.

I think that the jump to the hair replacement system should be done in the following months If I want to achieve a seamless transfer. One of the things that I can never forget is all those people that first got bald badly, and then suddenly appeared with a head full of hair, this is SO obvious, and don’t want this happening to me… so the wig is going to happen soon, or never…

It's just that replacing my real hair with artificial hair seems like such a scary and desperate feat, I hope I'm up to it...

 

[hair_tomorrow]

Hair_Tomorrow,

...
To me, the only question is whether I can make this work, whether I could really make people think it’s my real hair. The moment I do this, I don’t care about the rest.

It's not an easy decision. I guess you'll never know until or unless you try. Whatever you decide, my best wishes are with you.

btw - are you "THE" peter_mac, or a new and different peter_mac (just curious).

 

[EmoHurr]

Wow, I looked at your 1st post & was like "This guy has PLENTY of hair left" Then scrolled down & saw what you were talking about. I have to say, you do a GREAT job of concealing the hairloss. Personally from what your hair looks like now, I'd def give a hair system or two a try, see if it's worth it for you, some people seem to hate the work put into it, while others it's no problem. I actually am waiting on my 1st system to arrive, & am hoping it'll look really natural, but am not going to get my hopes up. As far as hair transplant go, I threw that idea out the window a long time ago after reading stories about them. It seems as if half the time they don't even work, I really don't wanna sign a contract paying 20,000 for something that might or might not work, especially when you have to deal with a scar on the back of your scalp. With my luck i'd go get the hair transplant, & then 2 weeks later they'd come out with something else that's 100% effective.

 

[Peter_mac]

btw - are you "THE" peter_mac, or a new and different peter_mac (just curious).

LOL !, when I chose this nickname I just wanted something so unique that there is no chance on earth anyone is using (so it will let me register right on the first time)... I thought to myself "Peter is a nice name, I'll add "mac" since I have a macintosh, and then "_" in between to make it REALLY unique"...

 

[Peter_mac]

Wow, I looked at your 1st post & was like "This guy has PLENTY of hair left"

This is exactly what I'm counting on. This is exactly what people all around me think. If they’ll know I want to switch to a hair system (without me showing them the “truthâ€￾ first) they’ll simply think I went totally mad, nuts, out of my mind, they’ll be certain I have serious problems that require professional help. This is why the hair system has to look REAL, if it looks real, people will not suspect. It’s the perfect crime… or at least it could be, with proper planning and execution...

 

[hair_tomorrow]

> . . . when I chose this nickname I just wanted something so unique that there is no chance on earth anyone is using

Thanks for the clarification There is another p_m, but I'm pretty sure we won't get you confused. Come to think of it, I don't know if he's posted anywhere in a while.

 

[youfunkithing]

hi pete mac I have been looking a hair system myself so have followed your post with great interest. I have been reading posts at toplace and Hair Direct I suggest you have a look as its quite informative. I have to admit aswell that some of the guys systems look amazing have a look for yourself. My hairloss is not quite as severe as yours however I am in the same mindset as yourself, I would rather swap to a system now b4 my hairloss is so severe that the change would be obvious, i cannot afford to have a bald head as I have psoriasis on my scalp and I would just look like I had the plague or something. Just my opinion but Im not sure a hair transplant would be a solution for you I have to admit, and there a guys out there younger than yourself wearing systems and they look great (on pics anayway).

One thing I would say is keep posting what you decide to do as I would be very interested in your progress and chin up mate this hairloss is a shitter I have to admit but we could be walking hundreds of miles to get fresh water for our starving families and were not were just tryin to keep a bit of fluff on our bonce

 

[Peter_mac]

I have been reading posts at toplace and Hair Direct I suggest you have a look as its quite informative.

Yes I know, I've been reading there all day

My hairloss is not quite as severe as yours

Lol, this is the first time in my life I hear someone call my hairloss "severe". Granted, since you guys are the first to ever see me without a comb-over

however I am in the same mindset as yourself, I would rather swap to a system now b4 my hairloss is so severe that the change would be obvious,

Yes, there's nothing like planning ahead. I always did it in my life, and I hope my decision here will indeed prove itself with time.

i cannot afford to have a bald head as I have psoriasis on my scalp and I would just look like I had the plague or something.

You can wait for HM, but if indeed it will take 10 years from now (and who really knows?) it is better for you to switch now and hence minimize detection.

Just my opinion but Im not sure a hair transplant would be a solution for you I have to admit, and there a guys out there younger than yourself wearing systems and they look great (on pics anayway).

True, my balding is too advanced to get good results from hair transplant (I only really noticed that for the first time yesterday when I took the pics). I need unlimited supply of donor hair…

Yes, I know younger guys than me are wearing, the thing is, when they show their “before†pics, then without an exception, none of them could disguise his baldness as good as I can, so I always treated those guys as people who really didn’t have ANYTHING to lose, my assumption is that even detection is better for them than living like they did. But in my case it’s not the same, I still have something to lose (my great comb-over, which gives me much easier life in terms of maintenance), but also a lot to gain (I actually can’t let a girl touch my hair now without ruining the illusion I have a full head of hair…, and wind is my enemy…). I never met anyone in my condition who chose the wig, well maybe apart from you… (but still you have the psoriasis thing, and if you didn't, I'm not sure you were here now with me...) This makes me unsure if this is the route I really should be taking, or maybe I’m getting myself into a bad situation here ?, I simply don’t know yet.

I simply don't understand, if hair systems can indeed look like your real hair, and cost a reasonable amount of money, how could it be that so few young single guys (who look bad bald) are taking this route ?, maintenance is a b**ch, but still, I can't see how the alternative of going bald can look better in this situation...

One thing I would say is keep posting what you decide to do as I would be very interested in your progress

Sure thing.

and chin up mate this hairloss is a shitter I have to admit but we could be walking hundreds of miles to get fresh water for our starving families and were not were just tryin to keep a bit of fluff on our bonce

Always good to keep things in perspective