Looking back at old pictures

[big_head]

One word: Stoicism.
http://99u.com/articles/24401/a-makers-guidebook-9-stoic-principles-to-nurture-your-life-and-work

I spent my entire teen years and half my 20s not caring about how I looked. Now that I do, it's frankly falling apart because of baldness.

I'm sorry but I'm still young, and I know some day I will not be. I can be stoic in 15 years. Right now I want to look good.

 

[Bowie]

Agree with the previous poster. Will be plenty of time for stoicism, just trying to get out of my 20's alive...

 

[Digidako]

I spent my entire teen years and half my 20s not caring about how I looked. Now that I do, it's frankly falling apart because of baldness.

I'm sorry but I'm still young, and I know some day I will not be. I can be stoic in 15 years. Right now I want to look good.

Than start using something other than Nizoral 2x a week

- - - Updated - - -

Agree with the previous poster. Will be plenty of time for stoicism, just trying to get out of my 20's alive...

That's a negative way to think, reframe that thought.
Instead of just wanting to get out of your 20's alive, why not enjoy them and make the best of them.
Would you rather spend all of your 20's being upset about losing your hair, or enjoy your 20s doing stuff that makes you happy ?

A counter might be that you can't enjoy your 20s if you dont have hair; of which is simply a self-imposed limitation.

 

[blackg]

The world sure enjoys a bald guy in his twenties. (sarcasm)

 

[big_head]

Than start using something other than Nizoral 2x a week

Plan to very soon, still haven't decided if I am going to go the expensive route of a dermatologist or just bite the bullet and order from India.

I feel like it might be too late though.

The world sure enjoys a bald guy in his twenties. (sarcasm)

I love people who pretend it doesn't matter at all.

It's like saying having no nose doesn't matter.

Sure, yes, you survive and you can live and enjoy life. I'm sure when I hit 66 and my skin is wrinkled and my hip aches, I won't be too concerned with hair, but I got quite a ways to go. I'd like to keep the one thing that held my looks together.

 

[Rudiger]

It's like saying having no nose doesn't matter.

I'm sorry, but the amount of dramatic and piss-poor analogies that I read daily on here is just infuriating at times. How often do people see someone with a missing nose? And how often do they see a bald guy, or even a young bald guy?

I'm only saying this to put it in perspective, you may feel like an alien when people look persistently at your head instead of making eye contact, and people are bastards if they do so, but I bet the majority don't and you focus on the ones who do.

 

[big_head]

I'm sorry, but the amount of dramatic and piss-poor analogies that I read daily on here is just infuriating at times. How often do people see someone with a missing nose? And how often do they see a bald guy, or even a young bald guy?

I'm only saying this to put it in perspective, you may feel like an alien when people look persistently at your head instead of making eye contact, and people are bastards if they do so, but I bet the majority don't and you focus on the ones who do.

No, I don't. People subconsciously put you into a different category though. Not having a nose is a bad analogy because there is a shock and gawk factor involved. But subconciously, people- especially women- will place men into the same category if they're balding or if they do not have a nose. So will employers, prospective customers, children, etc.

Society dislikes balding men. They find it ugly and it's something they will attack, just like being fat or being short. People will say "It doesn't matter" until the knives come out or they want to have a good laugh or they want to look down on you. That's just how it is.

It's silly, but we wouldn't all care about saving our hair if it didn't matter a lot.

 

[blackg]

No, I don't. People subconsciously put you into a different category though. Not having a nose is a bad analogy because there is a shock and gawk factor involved. But subconciously, people- especially women- will place men into the same category if they're balding or if they do not have a nose. So will employers, prospective customers, children, etc.

Society dislikes balding men. They find it ugly and it's something they will attack, just like being fat or being short. People will say "It doesn't matter" until the knives come out or they want to have a good laugh or they want to look down on you. That's just how it is.

It's silly, but we wouldn't all care about saving our hair if it didn't matter a lot.

Your my kind of man! Someone who ain't afraid to speak the truth.
Not a deluded fool vainly hanging on to the "it's all in ya mind, dude" theory.

Society, and human interaction are a daily cesspit that we are forced to plow through.

 

[Rudiger]

No, I don't.

I'm seriously asking here because a lot of guys on this forum talk about the day-to-day constant social assault on their hair loss, and I never get a straight answer, how many people would you say, as a rough estimate, actually look at your head, or give signals off, that show they are instantly consumed by your baldness?

When you say it all happens "subconsciously" well, there's no way of you knowing that.

 

[DannyBoyy]

I always liked to know where these people live who seem to have this judgement on a daily basis, im not saying it dont happen but its like its constant with some i could walk through my town centre and noone will bat an eye, you can honestly see them just going about their life. But i have had looks we all have, but is it cause im bald? or my huge beard? or cause im looking at them? etc etc i guess we never know since noone says a thing.

 

[big_head]

I'm seriously asking here because a lot of guys on this forum talk about the day-to-day constant social assault on their hair loss, and I never get a straight answer, how many people would you say, as a rough estimate, actually look at your head, or give signals off, that show they are instantly consumed by your baldness?

When you say it all happens "subconsciously" well, there's no way of you knowing that.

This is the point. Think about how you might talk to a very attractive woman with big breasts and a tiny waist versus how you would talk to a fat 55 year old woman with a raspy voice.

Are you sitting there consumed by this woman's age and fat body? No. But do you automatically put her into a different category in your mind? YES.

Now this isn't a big problem if you are a 55 year old man and receding looks normal on you.

If you are a 20 or even 30 something year old man trying to look his best to get laid, to get a job, to sell a product, to act in a movie (for those of us in such businesses where image matters even more)- the balding, the baldness, makes people put you into that category. I am not extremely short, but I'm not tall. I'm not ugly, but I'm not great looking. One of the things people always commented on was that I had nice hair. Now I have ****ty hair, and my only other future option if I can't save it is to shave it- and I have a big (seriously it's huge) pale head. No matter how jacked I get, it will always look terrible.

So people aren't going to point at my dome and go OMG BALD. But they will put me in a category, and to get out of that category I have to work 2, 3, 4 times as hard to even climb out of that then if I simply had hair.

Yes, this sounds very silly, doesn't it? Well, I never thought this way when I had hair, because I never thought about how bald men were treated. But this is the reality.

A fat girl can lose weight. I can't work hard to grow my hair back, I can only try treatments and cross my fingers. Shaving is great if your head is tan and small and well shaped. This is not most white men. It just isn't.

 

[Rudiger]

I'm seriously asking here because a lot of guys on this forum talk about the day-to-day constant social assault on their hair loss, and I never get a straight answer.

The trend continues.

You never knew bald men were treated how exactly? Being aware others privately group them into a category in their brain? Thats not being treated in any way positive or negative, its not really under the definition of what it is to be treated, and yeah that does sound silly.

I don't disagree with much of your post and I also don't disagree that bald guys are put in a certain unfathomable group, but that's not what I asked.

 

[Dench57]

Dench does your barber comment any on your hair loss? I know a lot of them won't go there, which is polite of them (I guess).

No he doesn't, thankfully!

 

[Rudiger]

Oh you will agree with us h.l.

At a point.

My new favourite worst thing about Fred: gets off on the idea of others suffering the same pain as him.

And this was way more obvious in another thread recently but fine deny it all you want.