G
Guest
Guest
Because my girlfriend of 4 hours has just dumped me because of hair loss.
This was the first girlfriend I’ve had in 5 years and it only lasted 4 hours.
I can’t believe my luck.
I met her when I went to a night club last night. She saw me with my beanie hat on, jigging on the dance floor. I asked her out and to my surprise, she said yes.
At this stage, my hair loss was hidden - obviously by the beanie.
Hair loss was the furthest thing from my mind at this point, and it felt great.
The first 3 hours went perfectly; she was good looking and I looked good with my beanie hat - hiding my hair loss.
Well, at about 3 hours 45 minutes into our relationship it then started to go slightly pear shaped, because she asked me to take my beanie off.
When she said this I got embarrassed and tried to change the subject.
'I thought she accepted me with my hat on' I quietly muttered to myself.
I was wrong.
She kept pursuing it and nagging me for a whole 8 minutes to take my hat off.
I felt like a rotten egg.
I couldn’t believe it. It was this early into our relationship and she already wanted me to take the next step. She was robbing me of the chance to wear my hat for a few more hours.
I just started to furiously shout at the ground “Damn it! Why me!â€.
At this stage I turned on her TV, only to hear the song "You can keep your hat on†by Tom Jones, play out.
Once again, I started shouting at the ground again “Damn it! Why me!â€.
I just wanted to leave and go home ASAP, so I could enter HairlossTalk.com.
Hair loss has driven me to the point where I wear my hat all the time.
She then started to quiz me more, as to why I am so reluctant to remove my beanie hat. This made me go red in the cheeks.
Not my face cheeks, unfortunately.
But my bum cheeks, which were now on display due to me pulling down my trousers in a last ditch effort to deflect the attention from my hair loss.
It revealed a tattooed Norwood scale I had imprinted on my ***.
"Knackers!" I furiously shouted.
I thought that pulling down my trousers was a good idea because she might of thought I wanted to sex her up - like a hair loss sufferer would.
Or even have sexty fun with her.
However, this didn’t work, so I pulled my Rogaine dungarees back up.
"Stop putting me under unnecessary pressure!" I shouted in her direction.
At about 3 hours 50 minutes into our relationship, her mate knocked at her door (As I was still round her house) The first thing she said when she entered the house was, “"Hello - why don’t you take off that silly hat".
In my mind, I just frantically fell to my knees shouting "nOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOwood!".
But only in my mind because I had to stay strong.
I was stuck for words, so I said the first thing that came into my mind which sounded something like "I am not a Norwood 3Vc+ with a cherry on top!!" which predictably drew weird looks from my girlfriend of 3 hours 52 minutes.
I felt a total idiot.
I couldn’t believe I said that; I was so embarrassed of my hair loss at this stage.
So I did it. I pulled off my hat, confidently.
This was met with a gasp from my girlfriend, who automatically shouted “I have to go!â€.
I then pointed my Norwood, North, acting as a makeshift compass
"That way's north!" I frantically yelled, whilst furiously dabbing Rogaine onto my assline.
Her friend was laughing her head off, as my matted down hair made me look like an uglier version of Gollum.
I looked a complete spud face.
My big 'Norwood scale V' expression face almost poked her eyes out, as I turned in her direction.
I then plummeted to the floor in shock, and desperately shouted in her direction “What do I take, Duprost, Dutas or Avodart?!†In the hope I would finally get an answer to this unanswered question.
Things then went from bad to worse, because as soon as I displayed my Norwood 3v in her direction, it became a race as to who was going to dump who first.
That’s when I picked myself up off the floor and ran out the house shouting "You’re dumped! ha ha ha!" whilst laughing confidently.
I felt quite proud of gaining confidence when I ran out of her house without my beanie on. Because I have never left my house without my beanie before. I was taking a first step to leaving my house without my beanie.
All of a sudden, my best hair loss flat mate, Boris, jumped out from the bushes dressed in his favourite diaper. We just looked each other in the eye and simultaneously shouted "We're the Norwood twins, and we love each other"
Before giving each other high 5's and jigging our hearts out.
Our hairy Norwood patterned legs were bending in the air whilst we grooved, waving our DermMatch manuals above our heads.
Sadly, my jubilation didn’t last for long.
Because I am now typing this message at my computer, as tears fall from my face and land in my bean sprout soup.
My relationship lasted just under 4 hours.
My hair loss is stopping me from getting married.
I feel useless.
Hair loss has done it to me again.
This was the first girlfriend I’ve had in 5 years and it only lasted 4 hours.
I can’t believe my luck.
I met her when I went to a night club last night. She saw me with my beanie hat on, jigging on the dance floor. I asked her out and to my surprise, she said yes.
At this stage, my hair loss was hidden - obviously by the beanie.
Hair loss was the furthest thing from my mind at this point, and it felt great.
The first 3 hours went perfectly; she was good looking and I looked good with my beanie hat - hiding my hair loss.
Well, at about 3 hours 45 minutes into our relationship it then started to go slightly pear shaped, because she asked me to take my beanie off.
When she said this I got embarrassed and tried to change the subject.
'I thought she accepted me with my hat on' I quietly muttered to myself.
I was wrong.
She kept pursuing it and nagging me for a whole 8 minutes to take my hat off.
I felt like a rotten egg.
I couldn’t believe it. It was this early into our relationship and she already wanted me to take the next step. She was robbing me of the chance to wear my hat for a few more hours.
I just started to furiously shout at the ground “Damn it! Why me!â€.
At this stage I turned on her TV, only to hear the song "You can keep your hat on†by Tom Jones, play out.
Once again, I started shouting at the ground again “Damn it! Why me!â€.
I just wanted to leave and go home ASAP, so I could enter HairlossTalk.com.
Hair loss has driven me to the point where I wear my hat all the time.
She then started to quiz me more, as to why I am so reluctant to remove my beanie hat. This made me go red in the cheeks.
Not my face cheeks, unfortunately.
But my bum cheeks, which were now on display due to me pulling down my trousers in a last ditch effort to deflect the attention from my hair loss.
It revealed a tattooed Norwood scale I had imprinted on my ***.
"Knackers!" I furiously shouted.
I thought that pulling down my trousers was a good idea because she might of thought I wanted to sex her up - like a hair loss sufferer would.
Or even have sexty fun with her.
However, this didn’t work, so I pulled my Rogaine dungarees back up.
"Stop putting me under unnecessary pressure!" I shouted in her direction.
At about 3 hours 50 minutes into our relationship, her mate knocked at her door (As I was still round her house) The first thing she said when she entered the house was, “"Hello - why don’t you take off that silly hat".
In my mind, I just frantically fell to my knees shouting "nOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOwood!".
But only in my mind because I had to stay strong.
I was stuck for words, so I said the first thing that came into my mind which sounded something like "I am not a Norwood 3Vc+ with a cherry on top!!" which predictably drew weird looks from my girlfriend of 3 hours 52 minutes.
I felt a total idiot.
I couldn’t believe I said that; I was so embarrassed of my hair loss at this stage.
So I did it. I pulled off my hat, confidently.
This was met with a gasp from my girlfriend, who automatically shouted “I have to go!â€.
I then pointed my Norwood, North, acting as a makeshift compass
"That way's north!" I frantically yelled, whilst furiously dabbing Rogaine onto my assline.
Her friend was laughing her head off, as my matted down hair made me look like an uglier version of Gollum.
I looked a complete spud face.
My big 'Norwood scale V' expression face almost poked her eyes out, as I turned in her direction.
I then plummeted to the floor in shock, and desperately shouted in her direction “What do I take, Duprost, Dutas or Avodart?!†In the hope I would finally get an answer to this unanswered question.
Things then went from bad to worse, because as soon as I displayed my Norwood 3v in her direction, it became a race as to who was going to dump who first.
That’s when I picked myself up off the floor and ran out the house shouting "You’re dumped! ha ha ha!" whilst laughing confidently.
I felt quite proud of gaining confidence when I ran out of her house without my beanie on. Because I have never left my house without my beanie before. I was taking a first step to leaving my house without my beanie.
All of a sudden, my best hair loss flat mate, Boris, jumped out from the bushes dressed in his favourite diaper. We just looked each other in the eye and simultaneously shouted "We're the Norwood twins, and we love each other"
Before giving each other high 5's and jigging our hearts out.
Our hairy Norwood patterned legs were bending in the air whilst we grooved, waving our DermMatch manuals above our heads.
Sadly, my jubilation didn’t last for long.
Because I am now typing this message at my computer, as tears fall from my face and land in my bean sprout soup.
My relationship lasted just under 4 hours.
My hair loss is stopping me from getting married.
I feel useless.
Hair loss has done it to me again.