I Wonder If The Rate Of Incel-dom Will Skyrocket In The Next Decade?

[Afro_Vacancy]

This isn't specifically related to hair loss, as there are many different ways to be ugly, and I think hair loss is going to be nearly cured in the next fifteen years anyway.

It's related to online dating. When I was younger people met others in school, summer camp, church/synagogue/mosque/temple, their jobs, night clubs, activities, et cetera. That is being phased out by online dating, I'm not sure the exact rate and how it impacts different age groups.

Online dating allows one to cast a wider net, and it yields dates for good-looking at a minimal cost of effort -- they need only make a profile and read the compliments that pour in, rather than dress up and go to a club. As they are the most desirable members, it is their incentives that drive the behaviour of the whole community, as the community will largely follow them.

When I was an undergraduate, I talked to people in class, and I got involved in student politics and the school newspaper. Now, I think a lot of students attend class with their earphones on, they keep their earphones on all day, or they look at their cell phone for a few hours a day. You cannot meet people in real life if you're staring at your cell phone all day. They will meet fewer people. If this accelerates, as I suspect/fear it will, we will see much higher rate of incel-dom among men. According to surveys only 5% or less my age are virgins in this society. Perhaps that number will climb far higher.

If that happens, the mainstream media and the general public will have no clue. We will see a lot of articles in The Guardian, The Washington Post, etc. about how men are unwilling to commit. We may also see some condescending articles about how some men don't get dates because they don't groom themselves and don't dress properly and don't have confidence. The underlying basis for that will be 80% of women competing for 20% of men, and not understanding why they're not getting partners. You are free to tell me that these sexual dynamics already exist in human nature, but my retort is that I believe that online dating amplifies them, whereas traditional social structures (marriage, church, shunning of adultery, monogamy) inhibit them.

 

[Rudiger]

The underlying basis for that will be 80% of women competing for 20% of men, and not understanding why they're not getting partners.

Woah this MGTOW post took a cope plot twist.

I for one embrace this new culture of 1 hot wife and 3 average side fucks.

 

[Afro_Vacancy]

Woah this MGTOW post took a cope plot twist.

I embrace this new culture of 1 hot wife and 3 average side fucks.

I'm not advocating MGTOW at all. I'm trying to describe things, not prescribe. If you want to read in a prescription that's up to you, and I can see how you derived MGTOW.

Anyway, that's enough posting for me today. I hope to see a lot of thoughtful responses when I next log in.

 

[Rudiger]

Uh just a little joke there.

I'll have a think about this one.

 

[SmoothSailing]

This isn't specifically related to hair loss, as there are many different ways to be ugly, and I think hair loss is going to be nearly cured in the next fifteen years anyway.

It's related to online dating. When I was younger people met others in school, summer camp, church/synagogue/mosque/temple, their jobs, night clubs, activities, et cetera. That is being phased out by online dating, I'm not sure the exact rate and how it impacts different age groups.

Online dating allows one to cast a wider net, and it yields dates for good-looking at a minimal cost of effort -- they need only make a profile and read the compliments that pour in, rather than dress up and go to a club. As they are the most desirable members, it is their incentives that drive the behaviour of the whole community, as the community will largely follow them.

When I was an undergraduate, I talked to people in class, and I got involved in student politics and the school newspaper. Now, I think a lot of students attend class with their earphones on, they keep their earphones on all day, or they look at their cell phone for a few hours a day. You cannot meet people in real life if you're staring at your cell phone all day. They will meet fewer people. If this accelerates, as I suspect/fear it will, we will see much higher rate of incel-dom among men. According to surveys only 5% or less my age are virgins in this society. Perhaps that number will climb far higher.

If that happens, the mainstream media and the general public will have no clue. We will see a lot of articles in The Guardian, The Washington Post, etc. about how men are unwilling to commit. We may also see some condescending articles about how some men don't get dates because they don't groom themselves and don't dress properly and don't have confidence. The underlying basis for that will be 80% of women competing for 20% of men, and not understanding why they're not getting partners. You are free to tell me that these sexual dynamics already exist in human nature, but my retort is that I believe that online dating amplifies them, whereas traditional social structures (marriage, church, shunning of adultery, monogamy) inhibit them.

But it has already happened, online dating is widespread, there is no stigma around it as there was in pre-tinder days. At least with young people. Statistics back this up, people on average are having far less sex, the number of virgins has increased in millennials.

The counter argument that this will continue to spiral out of control is this. We are already at a point where girls can and do compete for the top 20%. Why would it get any worse?

The only reason I see this extending further is if women start moving away from wanting LTR's, which might happen as people are choosing to have less kids, less marriages, moving away from traditions etc. But I don't think this has happened in a large way for above mid 20's women yet. And, as I've said, we already have online dating.

Most learn after a while that they will be pumped and dumped, or that they will have a STR and be left because the guy realized he could get better. Thus by mid-20s most average girls who want a LTR will have realized that they will have to shoot for average guys in order to achieve that goal. I've seen it with my friends already. Girls who have had 'chads' are now in LTR with average guys.

TL;DR: you are right in everything except it has already happened, online dating is already widespread, it might get worse if more people choose short term relationships/sex over long term relationships.

 

[Xander94]

If it's bad today it's gonna become unbearable in the coming years. Prepare yourselves now take the black pill and work HARD !

 

[shookwun]

Incels account for a small minority.


100% truth pill


(Excluding Asian countries)

 

[Rudiger]

If you're not at least above average in value due to a combination of your looks, height, status, personality, build, experience etc. You will struggle on the dating scene, and I mean really struggle: a couple of matches with fat girls every month, girls who lose interest in a matter of minutes, and even if you manage to get into a relationship, your girlfriend will most likely be frustrated, and dreaming of greener pastures.

I'm lucky enough to be able to date effortlessly, I'll never be sex-starved or unable to lock down a girl. This is stil not slayer level, tall good-looking guys have seen their value explode with online dating and social media. You have to be friends with handsome guys to understand, these guys could f*** another girl every single day.

This was not possible before social media, not as effortless anyway. In short, ugly to average guys are going to struggle more and more as social media and online dating become more popular, and above average to good-looking guys will see their value skyrocket.

I've found my own dating situation ridiculous at a point: f*****g 4 girls (all 4 from Tinder) at the same time, all ready to commit to me while some guys couldn't get a date with a non-fat girl to save their lives? I'm thankful to be able to take advantage of this, but I feel for the guys who are on the other side.

They could have had a looksmatched girlfriend more easily before the internet era. Now unless a girl lives her life completely offline, she'll wonder why this ugly incel is even making a move on her "I mean, we haven't even matched on Tinder. Creep!".

I'll give you credit for knowing the world of dating apps very well, and this sounds about right from what little I know about Tinder. I've never really thought about it until now, but most of my friends are active on Tinder or have been at some point, and the only one's who have had any success or mention f*****g a girl have been at least 6/10 if not a decent bit higher.

As for outside of that? A wide social circle is pretty much imperative, the numbers game of knowing plenty of friends, inevitably many females, and some of these females may drop their online standards to real life standards, or so average or ugly guys can hope. And to be honest, I see it happen all the time.

As far as pulling women in clubs and bars, it seems to be pretty much the same results as online dating, except there is the rare guy who most importantly isn't afraid of rejection and the numbers game, but also has that personality to somehow always create a situation where he can apply his personality to females and get somewhere (this being extreme extroverts- can't be taught, anyone below at least extrovert level need not apply).

I think shookwun is right, incels are still a small minority of the population, most people are still dating and even some average single guys get regular enough sex. However will this still be a minority in future, I have seen some articles about how sex is generally declining among the population, and this could be the effect of online dating and actually what David wrote this topic about.

Is it going to get worse? Will incels no longer be a minority some day?

 

[SmoothSailing]

and some of these females may drop their online standards to real life standards, or so average or ugly guys can hope. And to be honest, I see it happen all the time.

This is true and something I disagree with Fred on. I have friends who have had no luck on tinder or in clubs/pubs, but have sex with friends and some who are now dating looksmatched friends.

 

[Xander94]

If you're not at least above average in value due to a combination of your looks, height, status, personality, build, experience etc. You will struggle on the dating scene, and I mean really struggle: a couple of matches with fat girls every month, girls who lose interest in a matter of minutes, and even if you manage to get into a relationship, your girlfriend will most likely be frustrated, and dreaming of greener pastures.

I'm lucky enough to be able to date effortlessly, I'll never be sex-starved or unable to lock down a girl. This is stil not slayer level, tall good-looking guys have seen their value explode with online dating and social media. You have to be friends with handsome guys to understand, these guys could f*** another girl every single day.

This was not possible before social media, not as effortless anyway. In short, ugly to average guys are going to struggle more and more as social media and online dating become more popular, and above average to good-looking guys will see their value skyrocket.

I've found my own dating situation ridiculous at a point: f*****g 4 girls (all 4 from Tinder) at the same time, all ready to commit to me while some guys couldn't get a date with a non-fat girl to save their lives? I'm thankful to be able to take advantage of this, but I feel for the guys who are on the other side.

They could have had a looksmatched girlfriend more easily before the internet era. Now unless a girl lives her life completely offline, she'll wonder why this ugly incel is even making a move on her "I mean, we haven't even matched on Tinder. Creep!".

Can confirm only match with whales once a week when I show my face. Game over for me it's time to buy a basement to live the rest of my pathetic life.

 

[Rudiger]

This is true and something I disagree with Fred on. I have friends who have had no luck on tinder or in clubs/pubs, but have sex with friends and some who are now dating looksmatched friends.

I only really have experience of living in Ireland and England, other places I've just visited and got to know the hook up culture from bars etc.

But I thought here (Ireland/UK) that the online dating was becoming a thing, for a handful of years it felt like more and more people were meeting that way. Now I no longer think so, it's dying in only the last few years.

I think when we look at articles of things getting worse like I mentioned in my last post, we don't take into account that humans adapt and learn, and we don't give enough people credit for that. If you could message hot women on tinder and get to f*** one every few months, and then get promptly rejected each time you try and message them after, would you keep doing it? Or would you settle down with someone on your level for company every night?

And we expect women to forever keep f*****g Chad's here and there, and never learn from it? Interesting.

 

[Exodus2011]

Uh just a little joke there.

I'll have a think about this one.

joke but its true. the men in the top 20% would prefer this. its the free (romantic) market baby!

 

[SmoothSailing]

I only really have experience of living in Ireland and England, other places I've just visited and got to know the hook up culture from bars etc.

But I thought here (Ireland/UK) that the online dating was becoming a thing, for a handful of years it felt like more and more people were meeting that way. Now I no longer think so, it's dying in only the last few years.

I think when we look at articles of things getting worse like I mentioned in my last post, we don't take into account that humans adapt and learn, and we don't give enough people credit for that. If you could message hot women on tinder and get to f*** one every few months, and then get promptly rejected each time you try and message them after, would you keep doing it? Or would you settle down with someone on your level for company every night?

And we expect women to forever keep f*****g Chad's here and there, and never learn from it? Interesting.

I'm from Ireland BTW.

Agreed about the adapting. When predicting the future we often take where we're at, and the direction we are going, and project. Not taking into account how we might react to different circumstance, how the direction might change.

Truth be told, predicting the future is extremely difficult. You're almost always going to miss something.


I don't know about girls moving away from tinder and that, but I know many girls who have used tinder but never ever meet up using it.

 

[Xander94]

LOL If I tried I would get a match with 2/10 landwhales once a month and by mistake.

Don't try tinder it destroyed my confidence and made me even more depressed. I now know that my chances lie on the real world, and there's no way im going through the hurdles to "impress" women f*** that Im f*****g done. My destiny lies with inceldom.

Our value has been reduced to a f*****g left/right swipe it's outrageous

Basement life.

 

[SmoothSailing]

I don't have the extended social circle.

First, I have no need for it to meet women, and second, I'm an introvert, I hate those 'parties', those nights out where you meet friends of friends and you're supposed to give a sh*t about them and they pretend to give a sh*t about you, everyone goes to these things mostly to get drunk and to forget for a moment that yes, their lives sucks a little.

I have a few close friends, people like me in general, but I've never understood those social gatherings, it's just not my thing at all. Of course I've had my fair share of them at university, especially before my hair loss and depression got too bad, people automatically liked me and invited me to go on holiday with them, and I was not even that interesting.

But still, I hated those moments, people just got drunk, you got those fake deep conversations that got nowhere, people who pretend to have good time, the girls who started crying and complaining about how horrible their lives was, girls who got their purse or their phone stolen. Sometimes one of the average girls ended up f*****g the hot guy of the group, ugly to average guys never got anything but kept trying every single night out, and yes, sometimes, one of them got a pity f*** with his passed-out crush that was just dumped by her hot boyfriend.

Not my world. What I like: spending time with my best friends, going out with them, getting drunk, but that "meeting the friends of my friends" part. f*** that. That period at university where I seemed to be the most social, where I went out the most was probably the loneliest time of my life somehow. Like many people, I was trying to be someone I was not. I thought "hey, this is what the cool people do, it's fun, right?!"

Thank god that's all over. All that to say, going through all that pretending sh*t that I abhor to f*** an average girl?! No thanks.

And as I've said, I just don't need it.

Yeah I get that, I dislike club/pub scene, love getting drunk at houses though.

Anyhow I'm actually talking more about friends rather than friends of friends, I fucked my 7/10 friend, nothing awkward about it, second best sex I've had so far.

My 5/10 mate is now dating my skinny 5/10 mate, he was virgin before this relationship, would be told he was fucked in places like sluthate or lookism. Both friends for years before this. He never had any luck on tinder.

Just two examples of what I'm talking about.

 

[Rudiger]

I'm from Ireland BTW.

Agreed about the adapting. When predicting the future we often take where we're at, and the direction we are going, and project. Not taking into account how we might react to different circumstance, how the direction might change.

Truth be told, predicting the future is extremely difficult. You're almost always going to miss something.


I don't know about girls moving away from tinder and that, but I know many girls who have used tinder but never ever meet up using it.

Ah you'll understand a lot of where I'm coming from with my posts, although some of it is based on England as well which can be quite different (as it's more like city life).

And your last sentence hit home with me, because I have insight that maybe others do not on here that I've got many female friends, a few have been close friends for years, they can be open and candid about their dating life, and Tinder has literally been a swipe-left-fest for them. It's literally just a laugh, to see who's on it in their area. I've even seen them using it with their friends, stumble upon some really hot guy they all think is incredible, and without a second thought she'll swipe left and move on.

Nobody around her even questions the rejection of it, and I'm sitting there like "WTF" and they'd be like "of course he's HOT but like that's all..."

It's rare that they even swipe right, and often they don't know why they do it. A meet up? Even rarer. Hook up sex with online strangers? It's possible I wouldn't hear about it I suppose, but they've admitted screwing random guys before so I don't see why Tinder would be any different.

That period at university where I seemed to be the most social, where I went out the most was probably the loneliest time of my life somehow.

I'd agree with this when I was at my most social.

But Fred I wasn't going to get presumptuous in my other post to you, but you said it yourself, you don't have a wide circle of friends. So I think your views of things are based solely on the online dating apps, which are meat markets.

I guess it's not wrong when you initially wrote average guys will struggle "on the dating scene" because sure, if you mean like randomly asking out chicks in real life that the average guys barely knows, it's going to be a disaster. However if you include generally being able to get dates, through knowing people, work, whatever, there's a lot more to be said for average guys chances.

I've seen you write a lot about average or ugly guys chances of finding a girlfriend, and for my money, it seems to be based on guys who are practically autistic when it comes to dating, and have zero common sense. I could be wrong here of course, but do you know many average guys who's experiences you practically go through with them, being their friend?

Well having plenty of average friends, the ones with common sense definitely end up finding someone, they do have to put more time and effort in but eventually they get somewhere. And then there's others who are incel or barely get laid, and think a first date means getting pussy, absolutely clueless.

These guys normally end up getting a date every few months, it going badly because the guys a retard when it comes to women, and then he texts her until exhaustion and being completely ignored.

Most guys with self-awareness stay realistic about their chances, don't make assumptions, and wait it out until they get their chance. This is why it's still a small minority who fail to get anywhere.

 

[Xander94]

I thought you wanted me to get out of the lookism mentality. Yet you and my life experience are validating it every day

 

[Exodus2011]

LMAO!

 

[CopeForLife]

Started with level 4 as soon as tried to communicate with women Never was on any level above.

Implementing LDAR protocol nowadays.

 

[Exodus2011]

what looks issues did you have @CopeForLife ? weren't you norwood 3? but okay height? and half asian right?