Balding population

jd_uk

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I'm a fairly good looking guy. I always have girls looking at me at the bar and it's so easy for me to talk to them (not being cocky, I am far from it). My hair is dwindling fast and I feel like everything I stated up above will disappear as soon as I shave my head. I just discovered toppik and it makes my hair look pretty damn good, but I am disgusted in myself for using it. My whole situation is honestly making me feel mentally ill and I fantasize about number 1ing my head and getting my depressed *** back into the gym. The one thing in the back of my head though.. I will no longer have that initial attraction I give off to girls, something I've enjoyed my entire life. I have a great job as a programmer, a good personality but I've convinced myself my hair will destroy me. Once you get this mentality that I'm sure many of you here have, it spreads like a disease. I want so badly to get away from these forums, from stating at my hair in the rear view mirror of my car more than the road, for this whole thing to just be over. I need to figure out what it takes to just cut ties with this miserable obsession and finally enjoy life again.

Definitely get back in the gym. I went on a date with a girl just yesterday almost purely on the basis that she liked my arms. She wasn't too interested until me and my mate were joking around in a club and she compared our arm size...ignore the posters who state things about gym and weights not mattering because its untrue.

The rear view mirror stuff is familiar. Like you said it's a mentality and its hard to break. But you have to break it or it will break you. The thing is, the more you mirror check, the more the addiction grows. It's a form of anxiety...fear of what might happen and that anxiety can feed more anxiety to check agaij until it takes over your life.
 

SniperWolfMR

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Definitely get back in the gym. I went on a date with a girl just yesterday almost purely on the basis that she liked my arms. She wasn't too interested until me and my mate were joking around in a club and she compared our arm size...ignore the posters who state things about gym and weights not mattering because its untrue.

The rear view mirror stuff is familiar. Like you said it's a mentality and its hard to break. But you have to break it or it will break you. The thing is, the more you mirror check, the more the addiction grows. It's a form of anxiety...fear of what might happen and that anxiety can feed more anxiety to check agaij until it takes over your life.

The sad part of the reason I stopped lifting was because I don't want to have to look at my hair in the gym mirrors for an hour. This **** is destroying me. Remember back when you would look in the mirror to see your FACE? I can't.
 

jd_uk

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The sad part of the reason I stopped lifting was because I don't want to have to look at my hair in the gym mirrors for an hour. This **** is destroying me. Remember back when you would look in the mirror to see your FACE? I can't.

Funny for me but also sad, because i've been there. Get an old school gym without all the mirrors. I train 3-4 days per week outside now and am in maybe the best shape or my life after just a month of hard training. Calisthenics on the pull up and dips bars. I'm up to doing 20 pull ups with 15kg weight and it feels great. Good luck with it anyway mate...you aren't alone with it.
 

Afro_Vacancy

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Funny for me but also sad, because i've been there. Get an old school gym without all the mirrors. I train 3-4 days per week outside now and am in maybe the best shape or my life after just a month of hard training. Calisthenics on the pull up and dips bars. I'm up to doing 20 pull ups with 15kg weight and it feels great. Good luck with it anyway mate...you aren't alone with it.

You have impressive upper body strength.
 

jd_uk

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You have impressive upper body strength.


Thanks..becoming a bit of a hobby to see how strong I can get but aside from that the mental benefits are good. When you're someone who cares about hair loss, something which isn't completely in your control (it isn't for me anyway), then it helps to have other things that you can be proud of and feel good about. If it's a physical thing then even better. I'd recommend this sort of thing to anyone.
 

F2005

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I think one of the biggest misconceptions on here is that just because a bald man is not on a hair loss internet forum, then that means that they have moved on with their life and hair loss does not adversely affect them. It could not be further from the truth. I personally know hat prisoners and wig prisoners very well who despite the fact that they do not subscribe to an internet hair loss forum, are still terribly devastated by hair loss. It is perfectly natural for hair loss to adversely affect anybody. Especially since we live in such a visually-conscious society and baldness really does not do wonders for most men's looks. And we all care about the way that we look, some of us very deeply.
 

shookwun

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We know the impact it has. Self-esteem, women, social life, finding a job, etc.

Ignoring this impact and willingly lowering one's quality of life is stupid.


Sometimes ignorance can be bliss. Just going about your day realising people are stepping on you but not knowing the full extend, and address to the situation.

Sometimes I with I didn't know reality so well, and can be blue pilled. have the typical 'just be confident attitude'



it's funny Fred, the night & day difference how a women will literally worship you without having met physically or heard your voice verbally. I am talking to one in particular, everyday texting me 'hey baby' 'hey handsome xo' and flooding me with pictures. prior to this kept saying a guy like me would never go for her, how badly she would like to be with a guy like me, but knows the type of who will go for her. When she finally decided to randomly give me her number she has be abusing my texts ever since. I ignore her, she still texts... On other hand, when I get a hot girls number who thinks 'i'm alright to the point where, we will see where this goes' I never get this attention. Feels like I;m chasing something that will probably vanish one way or another. Aesthetics reign supreme, and you don't realise how easy it is until you find a women who makes you feel that way. it rele puts the whole dating scene, and how people treat you in perspective, and realising how easy it is when you're better then the women you're chasing.. its easy as pie. The hot girl wont care, and easily forget about you even if you don't text her..... Try it, engage, and then stop texting... she wont bother trying to keep the chemistry going

No more worrying about her not following through with texts, because everyone knows the ol 'i'll get back to you' most of the time they never do until you text them wondering what happen. No more skipping dates, and hangouts. it's truly amazing how a women can make so much time suddenly in there schedule for a guy they ctually are into. That's the problem with rele hot girls, even if you're a handsome guy, a lot of the time they will still bail on you. Unless of course you're top tier.... suddenly she has time, and is always available.
 

Roberto_72

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If someone has a job where age discrimination is a factor, it's definitely an issue. I
can speak from experience on that one.

What is your line of work?
I am a store manager and - luckily - "un certaine age" is appreciated.
But I do know that aging sucks also in the workplace

- - - Updated - - -

I know exactly what you mean shook.

It's funny, after almost 10 years on dating websites, thousands of girls messaged, 80 first dates, I feel like I've developed this ability to predict how a girl is going to react, how the date is going to go, whether I will have sex with her or only kiss her.

Today, I was talking to this gorgeous blond girl with blue eyes. I immediately thought "that's never going to happen". I ask her to meet and of course she replies: "I need to know you better first!"

In my experience, you need to be at least on the same level in terms of attractiveness for everything to go smoothly. If she's above you, prepare to go through a lot of resistance and BS. She knows she's pretty. These women would never, ever consider a bald guy. They're giving me a shot (at talking with them online at least) only because of my hair transplant.

But even then, she's above me, I know it, she knows it, so the motivation just isn't there on her side, no matter how long we will speak or how funny I will seem.

There is no place for hesitation in dating, if she isn't eager to meet you, don't even bother, she's just killing time and toying with you.
That's sad but true
And, again, the matching hypothesis...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matching_hypothesis
 

whatevr

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That's fair enough. Anyone who is on these forums cares. I'm just saying that i would rather be one of the guys who didn't care about it much.

Well and good, but if we're playing make believe I'd much rather be one of those guys who didn't have any hair loss to care about to begin with ;)
 

abcdefg

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Looking at number of guys on treatments might be a million, but a large number just look at options and say why bother? Most people dont like losing their hair id imagine, but if you have bad male pattern baldness your pretty much toast anyway. Propecia isnt going to completely stop it most likely its not strong enough. The odds are kind of stacked against you to begin with.
Do guys love the idea of taking a pill every day for the rest of their lives? Going to the doctor however many months to get checkups and the refills they have to have. Taking the pills everywhere they go. The lots of risks with sides effects or problems. It might not work anyway. Not to mention the costs which are not trivial especially if you work a low wage job or no health insurance. Its not at all hard to see why a lot of people dont bother treating it.
Also what effect male pattern baldness has on how you look, and how good/bad that it is can be very much opinion. Some guys might think it doesnt matter and to some people it wont. Very subjective, and that is why a lot of people can argue who cares? its just a minor cosmetic thing or turn it into a joke. It does make you look quite a bit older IMO
 
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