Avoiding eye contact

[kalbo]

^ You know, I found out a technique regarding eye contact when talking to a woman you're hitting on...... only look into one of her eyes.

Obviously you have to make eye contact or else she'll think you lack confidence, but the reason you have to look into one eye is so that you don't intimidate her too much. I don't know if it actually works but it makes sense. I heard it from this group of guys who claim to be "experts" at picking up the ladies. I know, these guys may seem like a big joke, but I've seen one of them in action and trust me, he knows what he's doing (and he's not really a good looking guy either)

 

[hairwegoagain]

i rarely look people in the eye when i talk to them. not my brother, my friends, my coworkers, women. Well, i try harder to look women in the eyes, but even then I look at the ceiling or somewhere else.

College, screw the hair. You need to get to a psychiatrist for some help.

 

[biglemoncoke]

its funny what this forum brings out, maybe because we don't know each others real identity, we can speak out what we think from our minds. I also never look at people in the eyes, people keep saying i lack confidence, maybe to some degree, but i just dont like to look, my boss told me to look at him in the eye when he talks, i stare at him then, then he fired me =.=

 

[Guest]

I.

DO NOT bring up your self esteem by looking down on 20 year olds. This will just put you in a mind set that will keep you from intereacting with them well, and soon you will widen the age gap. You have to see that you are using a defense mechanism that will skew your life views if you don't stop.

This is a great point and one that I've made many times. It is definitely amusing though to see people on here pick on fat people or young people who still have hair and say "oh someday they will be fat and at least i'll have muscles". Yeah but they'll have the hair.

 

[holyhair]

css you need some deep romance with a nice person that really makes you feel instead of thinking.
sometimes people outgrow eachother in the mind..no matter how pretty someone is..if they are boring they will suck after a while and annoy the crap out of you...no matter how good looking they are.
yes its alot of unhappy shallow people who trade partners like gloves..but everyone i know who are like that is deeply unhappy on the inside.
i guess its somekind of poetic justice in that.

about the staring.
i had anxiety a couple of years ago and a depression i could swear on my mothers grave i thought everyone could see it and that they hated me.
the second i got on pills and therapy it went away.

same ppl...same busrides etc..suddenly they didnt stare and hated me...it was just tired people staring because they have to put their eyes somewhere and if everyone stare at the roof it looks strange and hurts the neck.

they dont care enough to stare on you...its in your mind.

But i know how you are feeling i have the feeling everyone is checking my hair out all the time...but this time i know its mostly in my brain..

 

[CCS]

some people complain that it is OK to pick on bald people, but not fat people. While that is a valid point, I have never seen anyone pick on me or anyone else for baldness. Of course I'm in front of this computer a lot. I'm just wondering if the attacks are in their head, or if I just don't get out enough to see them. It is not like I don't talk about my hair with my coworkers all the time. The just don't care. One of them said my biggest flaw is my hunched back, and that if that were fixed, I would not have dating problems.

 

[Guest]

some people complain that it is OK to pick on bald people, but not fat people. While that is a valid point, I have never seen anyone pick on me or anyone else for baldness. Of course I'm in front of this computer a lot. I'm just wondering if the attacks are in their head, or if I just don't get out enough to see them. It is not like I don't talk about my hair with my coworkers all the time. The just don't care. One of them said my biggest flaw is my hunched back, and that if that were fixed, I would not have dating problems.

A lot of people on this site and others take out their anger from losing their hair on other groups of people, like fat people. Of course there are also fat people on this site so the anger is a bit misplaced.

 

[Guest]

some people complain that it is OK to pick on bald people, but not fat people. While that is a valid point, I have never seen anyone pick on me or anyone else for baldness. Of course I'm in front of this computer a lot. I'm just wondering if the attacks are in their head, or if I just don't get out enough to see them. It is not like I don't talk about my hair with my coworkers all the time. The just don't care. One of them said my biggest flaw is my hunched back, and that if that were fixed, I would not have dating problems.

I have wondered that, too... there's a student in my class at school who is like 27 or something (so I'm told, I haven't asked him myself) and he's been bald for at least 4 years. I have never heard anyone say anything about his baldness, he's just one of the guys, not "the bald one" or anything. To top that, my hair loss has been very obvious for this whole summer, yet NO ONE has said anything about it. Except my brother-in-law commented how I used to look like Kalle Palander (bald Finnish alpine skiier) WHEN I had long hair, but not anymore. That was weird... Anyway, my point is that I think our culture tolerates baldies much better than yours.

 

[CCS]

css you need some deep romance with a nice person that really makes you feel instead of thinking.
quote]

that would be a hot woman.



anyway, I've heard many guys, especially guys with pretty girlfriends, and even many women, say bad stuff about fat people. this is much more common.

 

[Nathaniel]

some people complain that it is OK to pick on bald people, but not fat people. While that is a valid point, I have never seen anyone pick on me or anyone else for baldness. Of course I'm in front of this computer a lot. I'm just wondering if the attacks are in their head, or if I just don't get out enough to see them. It is not like I don't talk about my hair with my coworkers all the time. The just don't care. One of them said my biggest flaw is my hunched back, and that if that were fixed, I would not have dating problems.

I have wondered that, too... there's a student in my class at school who is like 27 or something (so I'm told, I haven't asked him myself) and he's been bald for at least 4 years. I have never heard anyone say anything about his baldness, he's just one of the guys, not "the bald one" or anything. To top that, my hair loss has been very obvious for this whole summer, yet NO ONE has said anything about it. Except my brother-in-law commented how I used to look like Kalle Palander (bald Finnish alpine skiier) WHEN I had long hair, but not anymore. That was weird... Anyway, my point is that I think our culture tolerates baldies much better than yours.

I agree with this. I think for the most part society will not care, BUT the problem is just accepting yourself in the mirror. I think thats the biggest issue with being bald or going bald: Being able to tolerate yourself. Because if you hate yourself, your negativity is going to be perceived by others or you will just act stupid because you are focused on your hair, and that is when hairloss is really screwing your life.

Damn, I wish didn't care but I do.

 

[CCS]

I disagree completely. Society does not care if you are bald. Your baldness fades into the background. But women care as far as dating goes. they don't make fun of you because they are not expecting you to ask them out. They see you in a different role. it is only when bald guys hit on women that they all of a sudden think about it, and some do the hat snatch. it just depends on the woman and the situation and how confidently you were hitting on her. i doubt a woman would snatch a hat from a timid guy, since he is already acknowledging her superior beauty. Baldness does not stop guys from getting dates, it just means they get someone who looks a bit worse. Some guys can pull off the shaved look, and some tall guys did not need the hair to begin with and now are just at the normal level.

it still is important to believe in yourself as a 20 year old. If you think you are being weird for hitting on 20 year olds, and talk about, they will think you are weird too. If you act like and insist you are your age, they will have to accept it.

 

[Nathaniel]

^
I wasn't talking about women. Or dating.

I said you are not going to be noticed and that society will accept you being bald, I didn't say you will get more pussy by being bald or balding.

Thats is up to up to your looks + personality.