RaginDemon said:
Its who you are that attracts woman.
A woman likes a man thats confident and passionate. Even you are losing your hair, you will still attract a lot of woman with flattery, generousity, and integrity.
I tend to agree thats true in a lot of cases of guys that are balding. Usually all most balding guys need is to pull themselves up by their boot straps, and then their inner qualities will adequately compensate. But sometimes women can tell if a balding guy is trying obtain these qualities, which he naturally does not have, in order to make up for his physical flaws. They perceive this as being fake, which makes you appear insecure.
I mean, if you are normally shy and balding, women will be able to tell right away if you have a sudden new personality you have chosen to adopt. Even if they meet you for the first time, they can immediately perceive whether you are putting on a show, or are being yourself (quiet, shy, etc.). I may be giving the opposite sex too much power, but I have seen this happen to guys, including myself when I was younger. They really have this sixth sense that I can't explain. Women are extremely perceptive.
Also, we should keep in mind that some guys look handsome, or at least usually average, even with their balding. Others aren't so lucky. It won't matter how much confidence they naturally had or try to gain, most women don't go for guys they perceive as looking 'scary' or 'weird'. Its just how it is. Advances put out by these guys will be seen as 'creepy'. I am not saying its impossible to get a girl even with this stacked against you, but lets be practical. Your chances go down a lot, and that is tough on some guys.
Lets be real with ourselves here too in this area. We are no different than women when it comes to selecting a partner. Would we really want to date a woman that we found physically repulsive? I don't mean to sound shallow or cruel, but the fact is, deep down inside, I will be honest. I am attracted sexually to only women that are hot. This is true of all guys. It doesn't mean that I will persecute girls who are not attractive. Just the opposite. Sure, unattractive women may make nice friends, but would you really want to have sexual relations with them?
Now lets put ourselves in the women's shoes. They feel the same way. It doesn't make them shallow. Its perfectly natural to go for the average looking guy over the guy who looks like frankenstein. If the woman is kind, she may be nice to the odd looking who works at her office. She may even crack jokes and chat with him at the office, considering him to be her buddy. But if he asked her out on a date, no matter how confident, there is a strong chance she would politely refuse. You can't blame people for not being attracted to someone.
If I am wrong about all of this, somebody please chew me out and set me straight. I would like to be shown the true path, if there is one. Please show me.
And I am not saying that you can never achieve true happiness and peace if you look like a freak by most people's standards. But the chances are, you will not have the same opportunities in life as other guys who look to be what is percieved as 'normal' by the vast majority of women.
Its comparable to poverty vs. wealth. Some poor people in poor countries can achieve happiness, I mean its possible, but what is happiness? Perhaps happiness for a poor person is different than what it would be for someone born into a rich nation, based on materalism and lust. Perhaps their happiness would appear to us as misery if we experienced it?
Imagine if you are poor and hideous looking. This means you have no financial means to 'buy' women in a figurative sense, so you have no hope if you base happiness and contentment soley on being with the opposite sex. In the west, most guys, including myself, have the chance to at least move up the social ladder, if we work hard, and perhaps then it won't matter what we look like once we have money. Its basically prostitution, just not illegal.
I am rambling now, so I will stop. I am just saying I think there is more to life than women, but in the west, this is hard for all of us to realize in such a sexually driven society. And if we base happiness on women, then a lot of guys in our society will feel justifiably cheated. All of the false expectations we have set up for them will come to light. Reality sets in, and thats why a lot of guys on this site are so depressed. And to be honest, I don't think we should blame them. As a society and culture, we send out the message that beautiful women are essential to our existence as men. Then we blame the not so good looking guys for feeling miserable when they realize they don't have the same chances of having a relationship with these women. But there is hope, and I think its important to remember that as well.