georgesheardexpress9
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Norwoods.
All of them coming in varying shapes and sizes, all up to their varying activities, at varying times of the day.
This time, I was going to make it my obligation to venture out into the unknown and gauge people’s Norwood statuses.
A large, open area – brimming with Norwoods. Every single Norwood from one to seven had their fresh-looking Norwoods on full display.
It was perfect.
Ooh – what was this? I spotted a Norwood 3 in the distance. He was just sitting down- his eyes fixated on his mobile phone.
It was all there… from the significant temporal recession to the very subtle (albeit quite detectable, at least to me) decrease in overall density on the top.
The next Norwood to appear in my field of vision was a fresh-looking Norwood 6. Poor lad – he looked to have been in his late 20s and his hair was already practically gone. The characteristic bridge of Norwoods 4 and 5 was clearly on its last legs.
Trying to divert myself from feeling depressed about the previous Norwood’s situation, I thought I would attempt something vaguely amusing.
I would stand smack dab in the centre of the town and yell nonsensical hair loss related ramblings.
“COME ON!!! LOAD THE SCALE!!! HEHEH!!! GO TO TOWN!!! HEH! AND OBSERVE NORWOODS!!! NORWOODS!!! NORWOODS!!! HEHEHEHEH!!!!”
Everybody just stared at me quizzically – their eyes large and their mouths gaping. It should be noted that while I was yelling the aforementioned stream of dialogue, I was gesturing wildly and furiously dabbing Rogaine foam on my nipples.
I was living it up, alright.
I then whipped out my Ludwig scale (don’t ask why I have one) and bellowed the following – again, bang in the centre of the town, in full view:
“STUPID, STUPID, DARN….. THIS IS THE SCALE OF LUDWIG!!!!! LOOK??? SEE??? LUDWIG!!!!! LUDWIG!!!! LUUUDDWIIIGGG!!!!!!!!!!”
I can’t fully recall what transpired after that, but I do distinctly remember being whisked away by some odd-looking men in white suits.
Sitting here detained in a dimly-lit room, being subjected to sounds of screaming and incoherent tirades, I deliver unto you this vivid recollection of a great Norwood-spotting endeavour. Until we meet again, friends. Until we meet again...
All of them coming in varying shapes and sizes, all up to their varying activities, at varying times of the day.
This time, I was going to make it my obligation to venture out into the unknown and gauge people’s Norwood statuses.
A large, open area – brimming with Norwoods. Every single Norwood from one to seven had their fresh-looking Norwoods on full display.
It was perfect.
Ooh – what was this? I spotted a Norwood 3 in the distance. He was just sitting down- his eyes fixated on his mobile phone.
It was all there… from the significant temporal recession to the very subtle (albeit quite detectable, at least to me) decrease in overall density on the top.
The next Norwood to appear in my field of vision was a fresh-looking Norwood 6. Poor lad – he looked to have been in his late 20s and his hair was already practically gone. The characteristic bridge of Norwoods 4 and 5 was clearly on its last legs.
Trying to divert myself from feeling depressed about the previous Norwood’s situation, I thought I would attempt something vaguely amusing.
I would stand smack dab in the centre of the town and yell nonsensical hair loss related ramblings.
“COME ON!!! LOAD THE SCALE!!! HEHEH!!! GO TO TOWN!!! HEH! AND OBSERVE NORWOODS!!! NORWOODS!!! NORWOODS!!! HEHEHEHEH!!!!”
Everybody just stared at me quizzically – their eyes large and their mouths gaping. It should be noted that while I was yelling the aforementioned stream of dialogue, I was gesturing wildly and furiously dabbing Rogaine foam on my nipples.
I was living it up, alright.
I then whipped out my Ludwig scale (don’t ask why I have one) and bellowed the following – again, bang in the centre of the town, in full view:
“STUPID, STUPID, DARN….. THIS IS THE SCALE OF LUDWIG!!!!! LOOK??? SEE??? LUDWIG!!!!! LUDWIG!!!! LUUUDDWIIIGGG!!!!!!!!!!”
I can’t fully recall what transpired after that, but I do distinctly remember being whisked away by some odd-looking men in white suits.
Sitting here detained in a dimly-lit room, being subjected to sounds of screaming and incoherent tirades, I deliver unto you this vivid recollection of a great Norwood-spotting endeavour. Until we meet again, friends. Until we meet again...
