tembo said:
It seems like if it wasn't taboo, quite lot of men will admit to being gay. And it seems like even more women would be lesbians or bisexual if given the opportunity and encouragement.
I tend to think that gay men are that way because of their genes. However, a lot of lesbians can become so irrespective of genes.
Anyway, can anyone cite statistics or gay men, gay women, and bisexual men and women percentages?
This is such a tricky thing to measure. I would imagine the term "gay" and "lesbian" themselves are problematic. For example, I recently came across a phrase "men who have sex with men" and "women who have sex with women" but are not necessarily homosexual, or bisexual, but would probably say they were. Some people are GENERALLY open minded about sex, and will try many things, thus seeming to be bisexual. How do we define gay? I would define it not as a man who is attracted to some other men, but as a man who CANNOT feel attraction towards a female, and of course, vice versa, no matter how high their sex drive is (although this excludes drunken/intoxicated encounters which tampers with the default neurological state).
Infact, I would go as far as to say that attraction towards the opposite gender would need to be in the league of attraction towards siblings or other family members, ie. revulsion and natural 'disgust'. The truly homosexual/bisexual has to be neurologically homosexual/bisexual. Not an open minded occassional experimenter. I would guess that number will probably be a single digit percentage. I would guess that individuals of both genders who would be open to sexual experiences with the same gender would be much higher, higher than those willing to admit it (as some deny it probably) probably over 20% anyway. Men are less likely than women to admit bisexual tendencies simply because of the 'alpha-male' stereotype, and having sex with a man is what women do, and alpha males are not women, so therefore, "I will most definitly not even think about it!" type attitude.
Until there is a concrete way of identifying "true" homosexuality/bisexuality, any statistics would be premature and tentative. For example, I class myself as heterosexual, and probably a mild alpha male, thus would as a reflex deny any same-sex thoughts or desires I may or may not have. But I know I have thought about it, out of curiosity, and would not be ashamed or disgusted with myself if I ever pursued it beyond a thought. In fact, I used to feel a kind of neurosis about it, like a conflict. But sexual matters are really not that complicated. You get horny, you want to experience it with someone, so you do, (or you think about it :jackit
.
A mind-experiment for you all :mrgreen: Which of the following two if you had to choose, would you get it on with for a night.
These three transvestites. All are males.
Or these four chicks. All 100% female.
If you're 100% hetero, the second group of girls will be an automatic choice. If you KNOW the transvestites are males, but feel confused. Then simply knowing their gender is not enough for you to make a choice. How attractive they are to you is what matters. I simply chose those 3 coz we will all mostly be able to identify with that beauty, and what effect it has, despite knowing they're males.
The point is: Is 'KNOWING' for a fact they are males, enough to deter you? If not. Then your sexuality is not gender based as much as it's hormone based. You like femininity and are attracted to that characteristic, even if their biological gender is male. But does that make you homo/bi? Not really. The mind is after all wired in heterosexual men to identify women, and we will probably not be able to help feel attracted to the transvestites. But reverse the situation, imagine you found masculine females very attractive? Does that mean males who also fit that profile would also be attractive? Tough one. Is being gay attraction to masculinity/feminity? Some lesbian couples would appear to promote that view.
I think it's not as simple as a sexual 'spectrum' of one end being attraction to girly females and the other end manly guys. There's probably several spectrums, each of us at a particular point on it. They take into account gender, femininity-masculinity, youth-maturity, various physical shape spectrums, social spectrums etc. All quite confusing, the human mind caters to very varying neurotypes among us all, and few areas of human endeavour evidence this more strongly than sexuality.
