Hairloss=Mental Prison

sundevilb3

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I am tempted to shave off my hair, accept myself as being someone who has a shaved/balding head and move on with my life.

I am 22 yrs. old and have found that since I started losing hair, I do not feel like myself and am positive that I do not portray who I really am in public. I often feel quiet and reserved to a fault. I almost sense people thinking I am not friendly or personable because I am more quiet and embarrased because of my hair. It seems that I am not only losing hair, I am losing my personality as well and that is what is more valuable and bothersome to me.

I also find that there are many things I want to do in life but I keep from doing it because of hairloss. I find myself not wanting to meet new people for fear of what they might think. I know that my true personality would lend itself to making friends, but I do not have access to that personality right now for some reason. I also find that I don't go to the beach or in the pool because of what my hair looks like when it is wet.

I feel that it is not the hair being gone but my enjoyment of life and my desire to fulfill dreams that I have that are being restricted. This is all mental of course and can be countered with some hard work. I just want to make sure that I enjoy myself while I am on this earth and do the things that I want. To put things into perspective, the husband of a girl at my work is 30 yrs old and is dying from a brain tumor. I am sure if given the choice, he would choose hairloss over brain tumor.

I am fully capable, healthy, with a world of possibility and I am letting some fuzz on my head get the best of me. I don't think it is what is on our heads that is the problem. It is what is IN our heads. And that is a much harder thing to conquer and there is no propecia for that.
 

Aplunk1

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You're right. There's no Propecia to help my suffering.

Goddamn, I'm so sick of this life.
 

sundevilb3

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I think that there are just so many things we take for granted and are insulting those with the real problems. People are blind, deaf, paralyzed, dying of cancer, without limbs, severely disfigured, etc, etc. The list goes on and on. Of all the afflictions that are out of our control, which would you prefer to have life throw at you?


Aplunk,

the main goal that I have set for myself is to focus on the things within my control that will make me feel great. I don't feel like my style is up to par, so I will try to buy clothes that make me feel good. I will try to get a tan because i am very white. I eat healthy and get in really good shape. I will take better control of my finances so that I limit the stress that money can cause. All of these things we can control. I and I suspect you do as well, just need to accept that not everyone will love us whether we have hair or not. And the ones that are worth our time will not care. Until we find a way to be comfortable with ourselves, even the people that do love us will not be good enough to stop the mental stress of this.
 

Aplunk1

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sundevilb3 said:
Aplunk,
even the people that do love us will not be good enough to stop the mental stress of this.

Somehow I'm becoming more depressed about this.
 

JustBreathe

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Yea it's hard man...

In regards to being strong/positive mentally it's really an 'each day at a time' situation. It's very easy to fall back into mental habits such as self pity or depression which at the time seem totally justifable and reasonable, but we need to find some strength to push away those types of thoughts. A goal or aim is generally a good place to find a bit of strength when you are feeling down. The more you know who you are and what you want to do, the less these things bother you.

*sigh* ofcourse it's easy for me to SAY all of this.

But at least we can come here and get some back-up when we occansionally falter.

Aplunk1 - Shred your guitar man! I have always wanted to be able to play trippy solo's like pink floyd/devin townsend.

sundevilb3 - live a beautiful life man, have adventures....hike round Japan...thats what i'm doing in november. At the base of Mt Fuji I wont be thinking about follicles :D
 

Aplunk1

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I don't think I can anymore, man. A guitar won't get me out of this. I just am too burnt out.
 
G

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aplunk1 , you know i feel the same. sorry that i once told you to kill yourself. i hope you didnt take it personally. but i feel the same. i wanna die too, because of this sh*t. i almost get a social phobia because of this sh*t. it hurts me to go out. i have always fear that someone says something about my hair. damn. its so sh*t.
 

Aplunk1

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It's alright, 007, we all go through that sh*t. I just want to get better.

You wouldn't believe me... I haven't shed a hair in forever... then today, getting out of the shower, I ran my hand through my damp scalp and I got 1 hair, with a bulb on the end. I'm so scared that out of nowhere I'm going to get this huge f*****g Dutasteride shed. I now know how today's going to be: bad. Just because I shed 1 hair.

What the f*** is wrong with me?
 

wangho75

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switters said:
Yea it's hard man...

In regards to being strong/positive mentally it's really an 'each day at a time' situation. It's very easy to fall back into mental habits such as self pity or depression which at the time seem totally justifable and reasonable, but we need to find some strength to push away those types of thoughts. A goal or aim is generally a good place to find a bit of strength when you are feeling down. The more you know who you are and what you want to do, the less these things bother you.

*sigh* ofcourse it's easy for me to SAY all of this.

But at least we can come here and get some back-up when we occansionally falter.

Aplunk1 - Shred your guitar man! I have always wanted to be able to play trippy solo's like pink floyd/devin townsend.

sundevilb3 - live a beautiful life man, have adventures....hike round Japan...thats what i'm doing in november. At the base of Mt Fuji I wont be thinking about follicles :D

that's some pretty damn good advice there, you're unhappiness is probablly magnified because you have no aim or goal to revolve around. Find something to have faith in and work towards it. It keeps the mind off of hair.
 

sundevilb3

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that makes complete sense because every time I imagine myself in a situation where I am going after goals and doing things I want to do, I feel like hair would be less of a problem. It may be that losing hair just magnifies all of the other things that you feel are going wrong in your life. Being only 22, I am dealing with the question of what the hell to do with my life, so losing hair adds to the mix.
 

dorianyates

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Heres a solution...

F..k male pattern baldness ,shave your head slick, join a gym,get a tan and pump iron like maniac....

Grow up ..stop your whinning...focus on what you can control...choose to have self confidence.----women love self confidence...not a snail retreating back in his shell.

There are many people worse of than you so stop your self pity .

Peace
 

hairhaircomeagain

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This hairloss thing is eating up my life. And that too when it is about the time I enjoy my life.

My life was always screwed up. There was constant tension in my family. All my relatives where rich people and my Dad a poor man. My uncles used to make fun of my dad and I used to fight them. There were always fights in my house. All for money. It was so tough growing up. Inspite of all this I worked hard, very hard somehow went to school, studied in all that tension and thats why when my haor started falling everyone always thought it was stress.

Now, I am 26. I have a job that pays me almost a six figure annual salary. I wanna enjoy life now. But I cant. This hairloss has completely killed my confidence. It makes me look like I am some old guy. A few months ago my GF left me, coz she was a Muslim and her Dad wanted her to marry a Muslim. But this came right a month after she pointed out that I was balding...I dont think relegion was the reason. I cant concentrate at work. I feel dizzy all the time. Suxxx
 

Private Ryan

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hairhaircomeagain, i understand your pain... well, take heart that you are doing very well now...

hair loss does affect my life alot... i stopped meeting some old friends due to this... hearing comment that you are balding is not a fun thing to go through... i missed them but hell... that damn upsetting...

in my country, shaved head is not something that is not common and acceptable as cool to most...
 

hairhaircomeagain

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What country are you from? In my country too ( US ) shaved head is OK. But it does not suit me
 
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