I am 17 years old and have had alopecia for about 7 years now.
I do not usually share my feelings, but just wanted to get this out.
This is my story.
One day, after a haircut my mom noticed a bald spot on the back of my head.
It did not bother me at all at the time, and I was not experiencing any hair loss. This was months before my trip to Korea with my family. Like I said before, I was fine with the bald spot and it was something to laugh at. However, when we were close to leaving for Korea, little bits of hair started to fall out. I guess I was a bit nervous and stressed because it was going to be my first time meeting my relatives and grandparents. My dad took me to a dermatologist, and the doctor said to treat it with a topical cream. So with that, my family flew to Korea for our vacation.
Everything was great there. The food was great and I enjoyed meeting my relatives. The only thing that started to irritate me was when I rubbed my hair with my hand and big locks of hair came out. I was worried that I was going to be bald. Everyday more and more locks of hair came out. I got so uncomfortable that I decided to just shave my head, and the next day I did.
It really was not so bad at first. My head felt fresh and smooth and I felt really good till I walked out of the hair salon. Everyone was staring at me and talking about me. I was full of mixed emotions and did not realize that this would be the beginning of a long journey of building self-confidence. I had a hard time enjoying the rest of my stay in Korea, but I had the support of my family to help me through it.
Now back in America, I was entering the 5th grade. I was afraid that everyone would laugh at me or make fun of me that I wore a hat to school. My school had a strict dress code which prohibited wearing hats inside, so my dad told the principal of my condition, and it was okay. I kept taking treatments so my hair would grow back out and it did in the 6th grade. I was so excited and happy and gained my confidence back. However, when I wet my hair I saw that all of it hadn't grown back and there was bald spots all over. I didn't care though because when it was dry it looked completely normal. Than 7th grade came along, and my hair fell out again. You guys probably know how I felt than, pissed and depressed. However, my friends were really supportive and told me that it was okay, and that I look fine. I didn't wear a hat from the 8th grade on.
I could never have the confidence in myself as I did when I had a full set of hair. I tried lots of new treatments, hoping that one would work. From alopecia areata, to totalis, I was diagnosed with universalis, which is pretty much no hair anywhere. This made me feel really unmanly as my legs were smoother than any girl's legs.
Years later, I felt pretty comfortable with myself and my physical appearance, but I was never completely happy.
Right now however, I restored my confidence and happiness because I let it all down to God. I gave him my problems so that I would have no worries. He gives me hope even when I am broken and ashamed. I rely on him and guidance to help me through any obstacle. With God, I feel free and confident. He knows whats best for me, and if I am to live life without hair, so be it. Just be happy for his mercy and be thankful for his love. He will not give you a challenge that you cannot handle. Just trust in him, and if he believes that it is your time to have hair, he will give it to you.
God Bless everyone with alopecia, for we are unique in God's eyes.