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  1. #1

    Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    When i started to go bald i hated it. I was terrified of it really. I was a good looking guy in my mid 20's and then when i shaved my head thought that was it for girls - i found myself so unattractive. Im skinny, and white too. I spent a year doing everything i could to change it. Got major sides from propecia, no results from minoxidil, and tried lots of other treatments - nothing worked. I spent a year of my life in despair.

    Then a few things happened. I realised that the hairloss thing is about victomness. We blame hairloss, not being attractive, on the hair. But really, i already had low self worth, and was blaming the hairloss to stop me taking responsibility for my Life.

    Life doesn't work out how we want it. Most people will go through alot of suffering in their lives as they resist what is happening to them. So what do we really want? Happyness. Do people with hair all have happyness? No. Do some people who are bald have happyness? Yes. Ok - theres something really wrong here.

    I saw that its not what happens in life, but your reaction/ attitude towards it. Being a man is about taking responsbility for yourself, and looking after others. Ie: Not being a selfish / immature person. What woman would want a immature man anyway? I was a very immature person, not able to 'float the boat' not able to have real self confidence. I blamed the hair but it had been there since i was young - that feeling of not being good enough.

    Valuing yourself for your looks or hair is a losing game guys. Its a surefire way to hell.

    So i started to like myself without hair. I accepted it and stoped being a victom. if your a victom of hairloss - chances are you'll be a victom about most things. Its a hopeless situation because your whole life is ****ed because of something out of your control. Take the control back, own your life fully - however hard that is. Suffering is in your own reaction to life, that you can change, that you can control. Its just programming, you have to be able to go beyond what your mind is telling you at the moment. Its easy if you want to stop suffering - but impossible if you beleive your own bull****.

    My life now is the best its been and i am going out with an amazing looking girl, probably the most gorgeous girl i've ever been out with. More than that she is open kind and a tells me the truth. Yes she would like it if i could grow back my hair, but there are SO many other things she are interested in that the hair almost a non event for her. In fact, she gets really wild during sex with me and my shaved head. I think i look more masculine.

    Seriously guys, if your confident, you like yourself, your fun to be with, and your a real male who can take control - you will have a great life with lots of woman in it.

    **** the hairloss thing, life is short - Live now - don't become a victom. Victoms live terrible lives.

  2. #2
    Senior Member 2020's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    all right then.... we get it. Let's close this forum down boys!

  3. #3

    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    I know most people won't agree - thats ok. Being a man and taking full responsbility for how you feel and your life is actually alot of work.

    I also know most people here are suffereing - some badly... and thinking thats the only thing they can do is grow hair back. Im giving a different option going on my own experience.

  4. #4
    Senior Member fodandahalf's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Quote Originally Posted by BenVegas01
    I know most people won't agree - thats ok. Being a man and taking full responsbility for how you feel and your life is actually alot of work.

    I also know most people here are suffereing - some badly... and thinking thats the only thing they can do is grow hair back. Im giving a different option going on my own experience.
    If you've managed it then great, but for most people, that would just be tolerating something they can't stand, instead of truly accepting it. If it's possible to change, as long as it's not taking over your life, then why live with it?

  5. #5

    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Quote Originally Posted by fodandahalf
    Quote Originally Posted by BenVegas01
    I know most people won't agree - thats ok. Being a man and taking full responsbility for how you feel and your life is actually alot of work.

    I also know most people here are suffereing - some badly... and thinking thats the only thing they can do is grow hair back. Im giving a different option going on my own experience.
    If you've managed it then great, but for most people, that would just be tolerating something they can't stand, instead of truly accepting it. If it's possible to change, as long as it's not taking over your life, then why live with it?
    What i am proposing is the way of the warrier. To go whereever their is fear and show up there. Make the worst that can happen ok, and you can't be defeated. Whereever there is fear, non acceptance, you can be hurt.

    So if you put your self worth on you looks, every time somebody makes a comment or a girl rejects you based on it your going to suffer. Its not a smart way to live - not saying making the change is easy though.

  6. #6
    Senior Member antman's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Quote Originally Posted by BenVegas01
    What woman would want a immature man anyway?
    plenty of hot chicks

    Quote Originally Posted by BenVegas01
    Valuing yourself for your looks or hair is a losing game guys. Its a surefire way to hell.
    Quote Originally Posted by BenVegas01
    My life now is the best its been and i am going out with an amazing looking girl, probably the most gorgeous girl i've ever been out with
    so don't value yourself for your looks but value others for their looks?

    edit - the first thing u mention about the female you are with is her looks because you know that's what people make their first judgement about someone else. It doesn't matter the context which you communicate that information. wether its to your parents, friends or a 'where to buy the best pants forum' its the first thing you'll say/write because you know that's how human's are.

  7. #7

    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Our society values men for their power and confidence, and woman for their looks and beauty.

    Its actually a very sad thing - one that is in the way of happyness. Im not immune to this. i was putting forward that example to show that a bald skinny guy can still attract attractive woman. This came as a surprise to me - but shows the other things in play.

    Its true too that if you value girls only for their looks, you objectify woman and you'll never be happy either.

  8. #8
    Senior Member slipy's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    what id like to know how could baldness be used to one's advantage as implied in the title. :/ to scare folks away?

  9. #9
    Senior Member antman's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Quote Originally Posted by slipy
    what id like to know how could baldness be used to one's advantage as implied in the title. :/ to scare folks away?
    people who have life too easy lack resilience and character

    not letting hair loss get to you builds both of these which are assoiated with strong masculine traits; making you a supa sexy alpha male

  10. #10
    Senior Member slipy's Avatar
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    Re: Going bald? Use it to your advantage

    Quote Originally Posted by antman
    Quote Originally Posted by slipy
    what id like to know how could baldness be used to one's advantage as implied in the title. :/ to scare folks away?
    people who have life too easy lack resilience and character

    not letting hair loss get to you builds both of these which are assoiated with strong masculine traits; making you a supa sexy alpha male
    i agree with everything except for that part.

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